Music to listen to around other people.

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I have pretty eclectic tastes in music. The main purpose for this is like, let's say I'm driving, and I have people I don't know in my car. You know, a big practical example of this is like, "friends of a friend" kinda thing. Also, at my old church, with a big youth group and socializing and all that, I'd be giving other people rides too. I hate giving rides, but that's besides the point.

Anyway, I'm wondering what type of music is like "appropriate" to play for when you have people ride in your car, or at your house, etc. I do like a lot of music that'd be considered "mainstream" or at the very least, knowable by a normal person, as in heard on a radio station. But, that music isn't what I "normally" listen to, a good deal more of the time, like 60-70% of the time, my music isn't "normal" and it's quite abnormal for a 21 year old male, like girly jpop and eurobeat, Russian pop, etc, even some of my American music tastes, not "normal" for a 21 year old male to listen to Michelle Branch for example.

So the basic question is, should I "fake it" and play stuff that I'd think other people would probably like, or play whatever I'd normally be listening to, even if it's like, weird music? Like should I make a playlist of "For when other people are in the car with me." Again, too, it's not so much if it's like, people I don't care about their opinions one way or the other. If I don't care about their opinions one way or the other, then even if they complain about my music to me, I won't care at all. But, an example would be, say, a date. On a date with a girl you don't know, do I just go do my "normal" music, or do I go for the "Stuff for other people" list?

Most of me thinks it's the former, just play whatever, to be authentic. I figure, screw it, if they're around me long enough, they'll catch me listening to my "weird" music, and then the jig will be up, so to speak. So that's normally what I do, but that's contrary to the advice I've gotten from some other people. I have a Pakistani friend, with sorta eclectic English music tastes (lots of old singers, ala Sinatra, and classical music) and then he listened to Spanish and obviously Pakistani music, and he told me to listen to the radio for a date or anything like that. But I never listen to the radio, though (except one station, but that doesn't come in on my mom's Galant radio, and that station plays old R&B, so it's hardly "cool" anyway.) But, again, conformity and all, sometimes it is the answer, as I learned in regard to clothing anyway (another story for another day...)

I've got other experience with this, too, as my skating rink, the PA speakers in the rink are setup so anyone can just plug in anything with a headphone jack. So most of the time, unless it's a "public" public session, ie, a 50+ people session, whoever wants to can play whatever, and you just take turns. I'd say of the majority of days, I get control over it. But, when I first started playing music, I pretty much pissed a ton of people off by what I played. Like, my happy hardcore was way too high BPM, Japanese music, etc. Nobody really comments now, and I figure three things have happened. I've found a bit more "middle ground" with my music, and can sorta gauge what I can play without getting bitched at by the demographics at the rink that day. Also, I've become a more "serious" skater, and that gives you slack, as it's like, you get more respect for it, and people don't figure I'm "just" a weird young guy who casually skates. But also, going along with that, I've just been there longer, and people have just gotten used to it. Oddly for my music, most of the older people tend to like my music, but I've not gotten the same reaction out of people my own age. And it's not like I play only old music, far far from it. I played this, the Outlaw Star ending for example, and by two separate older women was told it was beautiful, but yeah. So it's entirely possible all young people are just Cretans or something. Besides the point, though. The other thing too, skating is a different crowd of people in general, to dedicate yourself to a pursuit like that, there's usually some streak of "not normal" in you, but it's a different "crowd" from what I've observed.

Through my music at the rink, though, I've met a girl with similar eclectic music tastes, and it's good as I'd otherwise have not much to communicate with her about. So I've gotten success in that regard from playing my weird Japanese music (in this case, it was L'Arc En Ciel.) But for the success in regards to just sorta "letting it all hang out" in regards to music, I probably put off a lot of people, too.

So, what do you think? Be myself regarding music, or mask it? I guess this is a seemingly minuscule issue, probably of not too much importance, but I figure I'd ask. Anyone else wonder the same sorta thing sometimes? How their choice of music affects other people's opinions of them?

I think at the rink you should play stuff that will be acceptable to more people. Remember, there it's not just for you, it's for every one. In your own car you have more say in what you play. However, I would probably play more conventional music while giving slightly known persons a ride, so as not to leave them with the impression that I am really weird. Driving friends is a different matter. They must either come to accept your differences or at least tolerate them. Or not be your friend. One thing, though. Never play any music really loud. I've found that no music sounds good when played LOUD! Also, it puts your hearing at risk.

In the end, it's really up to you what you play in your car, but I do recommend more standard fare at the rink.

an unwritten rule to these situations, especially when given rides, is that the driver chooses the music, he is the one that needs to be the most comfortable in the situation.

it might be a good idea to stay close to mainstream if you can, but if you get comments: it's your car, you drive, if they dont like it, too bad

you could always make a spiceal CD/playlist to play in the car when you are driving people around that has some "normal" music AND some of the music you like too? that way everyones a winner you never know, some of them might secretly like your music. ( i nicked my grandads jhonny cash CD to put on my ipod, one of the most played songs on it is "a boy named sue" lol )

good luck
R x

I knew someone who used to play a combination of italian opera and gangster rap when he would drive lol, I never thought any less of him for it! But I would say if your tastes really are out there, then either don't play any music, play some "pop" stuff, or play something you like that is quiet/calming so it doesn't really bother anyone (in other words, nothing loud or violent).

I get annoyed with the music rules, and also confused. I remember when I used to collect the ''Pop Party'' CDs each year, and my cousin started laughing and going, ''that's for little kids!'', but I wondered why because the songs on ''Pop Party'' CDs were all mainstream songs. They are just songs rounded up and put on a CD, possibly for dancing to at social parties, and I thought NTs (mostly teenagers) liked parties and dancing? And I knew it wasn't just my cousin who thought that, because one of the girls at school saw I had a Pop Party CD in my CD walkman (we didn't have MP3s or iPods back then) and one of them said, ''my little sister got that for Christmas'', then added, ''she's 8.' And I could tell in the way she said it that she was implying it was a little kid's CD. Jesus, what's the big deal?

Anyway, they'd laugh now - I like to listen to nursery rhymes!! !

But anyway, back to the topic, apparently the music for young people these days are these sorts:-

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uelHwf8o7_U
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qrO4YZeyl0I&ob=av2e
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bESGLojNYSo&ob=av3n
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vmJBdvhPoUY

That's a few anyway. They are always on the radio, are very popular and people are always singing them.

But, you never know, I could be wrong. A lot of people I know love Venga Boys and they sing it and everything, but I heard my mum say that they are a bit ''naff''.

My mum won't tell her older sister that she likes the Dubliners either.

Well, for the rink, it depends on how many people are there, I sorta taper it. But, the rink has it's own weird social rules. There's a Russian coach, he'll listen to some odd Russian music, he listens to lots of foreign stuff, and nobody can really like, do anything about it, as he's a high level figure skater and a coach. So, to an extent, I copy him, mix my "weird" music with normal music like he does. Also, he's introduced me to some music I like, so yeah. To contrast, there's a Chinese guy who's in his 50s who goes to my rink, like fairly fresh off the boat and very much awkward in his own way. He very rigidly insists upon playing the Top 40 Radio, and NOW That's What I Call Music CDs, and then is like "aha, everyone else here is dumb because they're not playing mainstream music like I am." I guess it's his attempt at cultural assimilation. He'll b***h at me for my music not being exciting enough, too, sometimes over the same tracks other people go out of their way to compliment. And he's actually managed to piss off a few people by doing that, including one lady I know there who plays like, lots of Alice in Chains and stuff. But what you hear there is pretty random, sometimes people even play slightly remixed Gregorian chants and the like. The other thing, too, if anyone asks, I let them play their music, just on the basis of me being there more often and having control of the music more often than others. Generally what I'll "taper" with for getting more mainstream would be something like this: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WdO85Qf4Poc So the rink, I think I've mostly "figured out" how to do it there, with a lot of social errors in the process.

So most people are recommending to have a secret "normal music" playlist or something for strangers? One way I see the weird music though, is as a test, to weed people out early on, if you get what I mean. Should I sorta actively try to weed people out like that, sorta lay all the cards on the table and "if you don't like it go away" kinda thing?

To be honest, you choose what you want to play so long as isn't a cultural debate in the car.

If you have a laptop with a MiFi(Internet Hotspot from Verizon) go to VTuner.com and Stream international Internet Radio(: Imagine them listening to NRJ from France, Capital FM from London, Russian Radio or even some Israeli Radio(Gagalatz).

Pick some random station and see who is the popular one lol.

I have done this before and I was quite popular in the car.

Well I might not do that advice, but damn dude, what a great site, thank you so much. I wish I had one of those wireless dongle things, and a laptop for that matter. It'd be neat to integrate that into a car head unit. Hmm, that's an idea... Thank you though.

EDIT:
And WTF, Germany has way better radio than here. As patriotic as I am, wow, times like this make me wanna move.

When I'm a passenger in a car, I don't mind what the driver is listening too as long as it's not too loud. Listen to the music you want to listen to.

Be yourself, but don't impose your music on others if they ask you not to. You could put on whatever you're going to put on but let your passengers know you're willing to change if it bothers anyone.