What do you hate most about NTs? (No offense intended)

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ArthurDent
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16 May 2012, 8:05 pm

bumble wrote:

ArthurDent wrote:

Being indirect bothers me the most, also lying to be polite, the truth does hurt but it is that pain that drives all of us to better ourselves and isn't that what we all want I know I do.

It is inspiration that drives us to better ourselves, not pain. Pain is destructive and tends to be more soul destroying than anything else.

As destructive as pain is, it is an effective tool for learning what not to do if not evolution would have discarded it for something better.

Danimal
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16 May 2012, 8:28 pm

I become exasperated by the constant lying and the constant need for small talk.

bumble
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16 May 2012, 8:46 pm

ArthurDent wrote:

bumble wrote:

ArthurDent wrote:

Being indirect bothers me the most, also lying to be polite, the truth does hurt but it is that pain that drives all of us to better ourselves and isn't that what we all want I know I do.

It is inspiration that drives us to better ourselves, not pain. Pain is destructive and tends to be more soul destroying than anything else.

As destructive as pain is, it is an effective tool for learning what not to do if not evolution would have discarded it for something better.

Some types of pain are useful for learning such as not to touch a hot kettle if you don't want to get your hands burnt...but other types of pain are pointless and not really needed such as bullying someone and causing them pain for ones own amusement (for example).

When it comes to the truth, sometimes it is better to keep it to yourself. Some pain is unnecessary. Ie If you have a friend and her husband beats her up and she comes around to your place. If her husband turns up looking for her I would hope that most people would lie and say she was not there. I know I would in that instance! (Actually I'd not interact with the husband at all if possible but if I had to...then yes I would lie and say I had not seen his wife).

In other instances, I would be more honest, but not in that kind of instance as it would be opening up a whole world of pain that is not required, especially for my friend.

Apart from which, you can only ever give a relative truth, not an absolute one anyway. For example, if someone says 'does this look ok' and you don't think it does look ok remember that that is only your opinion and it is not a 'truth' as such at all. Someone else might think it actually looks fine.

Why do people mix up the truth with opinion?

Dp0p
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16 May 2012, 8:49 pm

iheartmegahitt wrote:

So, what is it that really bothers you about NTs aside from them being ignorant about your condition? Like what are the main things that just drive you crazy?

For me, it's when they fail to understand that just because I can pretty much function on a basic level that I still have struggles that can cause anxiety and meltdowns.

The thing with me is I can act and be a normal functioning person yet there are things that could happen that say, I don't expect or something and I end up melting down. Then the person ends up being really ignorant about it and calls me childish or a brat for melting down over something.

Other things include my irriational fears. Like one person on Gaia who was being ignorant over my fear of darkness and my routine of the TV always being on before bed. It really drives me nuts because then she started saying i was using it as a crutch when I was merely trying to explain it to her. >_>

So what is it about NTs that drive you absolutely nuts? Anything?

Also, to the NTs here: No offensive is tended to the ones who are willing to get to know us more or have friends/family with an autistic condition. This most likely doesn't apply to you and just the ones that are more ignorant and unaware of what we go through.

their societies focus on the social world, i always used to hate vulcans but as i have matures i have come to realise that they almost had it right ( an aspie society would be better though) also the fact that the american government refures to ADD and ADHD as 'the soldier gene' they use us to develop the weapons then they use our thought encombered bretheren to fight with them. the NT greed and waste makes me sick and their illogical actions boil my blood, but most of all i hate how they have turned me into what they want me to be. i was happy as an aspie with add and asthma but their xenophobic society has morphed me into a protuctive member of NT society. however if all goes to plan it wont be long before we are recodnised as the next stage in human evolution (when i was younger i always wondered why i liked neanderthals more then homo sapiens, i guess its because im not a homo sapien im a homo novus)

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treblecake
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17 May 2012, 7:29 am

Danimal wrote:

I become exasperated by the constant lying and the constant need for small talk.

I agree, lots of the time when I have conversations I spend most of it thinking about whether they were telling the truth. Also I swear small talk will be the death of me.

Another thing that annoys me about NT is how they exagerate stories and add in details that never happened.
I had a friend who was very fond of that and often she told stories which included me to our friends, I always had to correct the extra details she added to the story. It annoyed me so much.

NeueZiel
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17 May 2012, 8:00 am

Thinking my condition (ASD and OCD) is made up, that the only way I can get better is to man up and that I'm this or that. I dislike other things about "NTs" but I think these are aspects that other normal people dislike too and isn't a unique problem made by ASD. I don't know if its because I'm not NT but I view relationships as extremely personal, important bonds with someone since its so hard for me to connect emotionally and create that bond. I despise how normal people and media portray relationships, people don't care about you or your mind/heart/whatever makes you special, its just about being with who's perceived as cool or adding another "notch" to your belt. I guess this is an NT thing because people suggest you can cure ASD and aspergers by drinking beer and going out to party. Tried it, ended very badly. I don't like alcohol much anyway.

Also LYING. I don't get what is with people who say "Yeah, let's go do this on Tuesday, I'll meet up with you!" then they ignore your call and don't show up. Its not polite, its rude as hell and I can count past both hands and the amount of people I know who have done this to me in the past. Really dislike how I'm forced to give a s**t about certain celebrities, their ongoings, sports etc. I don't expect other people to care about s**t I obsess over so why is it so socially unacceptable and weird I could give a rat's ass about Paris Hilton.

With all that said, I really don't hate "NTs" or really go out of my way to label people who don't have ASD, aspergers, hfa, or whatever. I've known nicer, friendlier NTs than fellow autistics to be honest, but I think that's normal. I just hate rude, mean, insensitive people and both sides of the spectrum have those traits.

zombiegirl2010 wrote:

1. Small talk...

2. they get excited and cheery about the weirdest stuff (make-up, shoes, clothes, gambling, shopping, sports, **ad nausium**

3. gossip...oh the incessant gossip that I am forced to listen to!

I'm sure I'll think of more later, but those are my top 3.

Aren't we kind of the same way too though? One of the traits of HFA and aspergers is having certain obsessions and subjects that you can't stop talking about, much to the detriment of others. Other people probably think "oh those autistics, they get excited and cheery about the weirdest stuff (trains, airplanes, math, roleplaying games, entomology, geometry, **add nausium**)

Ark
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17 May 2012, 9:27 am

Well I think that both Neurotypicals and Autistic people can equally annoy me. It has nothing to do with their neurological wiring and more to do with the development of their cognitive disposition. For instance, Autistic people can be just as: Ignorant, stupid, mean, hateful, nice, happy, sad etc. as a neurotypical. That being said I absolutely hate shallow, superficial people.. and constant small talk.

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17 May 2012, 11:45 am

NeueZiel wrote:

That and NTs who consider that you are using your disability as a crutch or for 'special attention'. It really drives me nuts when they do that. I mean okay yeah, so i can walk, talk and function normally! But you piss me off and you'll be sorry you even tried to mess with me. It's also the NTs that my mom deals with when they say things like, "control your child" or "You need to spank her she's a brat" or something like that.

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17 May 2012, 1:13 pm

Hate: Their emotions

...

Love: Their emotions

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18 May 2012, 10:17 am

NeueZiel wrote:

So we should all be interested in the same things to go along ?

I would say the problem is that there are too much NT people, so that we get fed up with their obsessions.

One point for Aspie, they are interested in different things, not always the same. So it's not exactly right when you just copy the list. See what I mean ?

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18 May 2012, 10:47 am

Well I don't like how NTs can be smug and think because they are normal they are better than you.

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Joe90
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18 May 2012, 12:14 pm

Some NTs when they expect/want a personality trait out of you yet if you were naturally like it, they would complain.

Like I know my mum really wishes I was into clothes and dressing up and going shopping for clothes like a lot of women (including her) are, and that most girls of my age often get into a habit of buying a garment almost every time they enter a clothes shop like it's irresistable. I'm the opposite from that, but if I WAS like that, I bet my mum would be saying, ''tsk, every time you walk into a clothes shop you always buy something. You can't keep on, you haven't got much money/you haven't got much room in your wardrobe'', even though, deep down, that is what she wants me to do.

Another thing is the other day I heard someone saying, ''tsk, my 23-year-old son came in drunk as a lord last night, he's just like what a silly 16-year-old would do, getting stupidly drunk like that!'', then the next day I heard her talking to her sister (who has a 16-year-old son who got pissed out of his head from going to a party), and she was like, ''tsk, he shouldn't be doing that at all, he's only 16, he's not old enough to drink at 16! It'd be OK when he's old enough, but not at 16!'' So parents seem to expect a 16-year-old to get drunk, then when one does, it's still not OK. What?

By the way, this hasn't got much to do with NTs, since an Aspie might look at this way too, but just saying anyway.

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zeldapsychology
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18 May 2012, 2:27 pm

Joe90 wrote:

Sorry just to clarify your example. The 23 yr. old coming in super drunk then them mentioning the 16 yr. old in that sentence they are saying the 23 yr. old was acting immature and doing something they believe an immature 16 yr. old teen would do. They did NOT expect a 23 yr. old to come in drunk like that. The second part is yes they feel like OMG! a 16 yr. old shouldn't be drinking at all!! !! OMG!

Just wanted to clarify. :-)

Sorry.

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18 May 2012, 2:40 pm

I would say the word hate is a strong word however they do come across as annoying none the less and at times they treat you inferior as well.

Joe90
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18 May 2012, 3:13 pm

I hate the way some NT women glare at me for being younger, prettier and slimmer than them (in their opinion).
I'm everso sorry, I was born this way. Deal with it. I'm jealous of all my cousins for being more socially able than me but I still have to grin and bear it.

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18 May 2012, 3:54 pm

Joe90 wrote:

That's not at all related to neurology-
that's to do with women being brought up to constantly assess themselves against other women.

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