What do you hate most about NTs? (No offense intended)

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iheartmegahitt
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16 May 2012, 11:41 am

dinab71 wrote:
Im NT, as far as I know, but what bugs me about NTs that dont take the time to understand is when they hear someone is autistic, or aspergers, they assume your all the same...ie, they expect every aspergers person to be genius at something, they expect all aspergers not to like physical contact they expect the same from all autistic people too.


there are as many differences amongst the autistic and aspergers community as there are in NTs.

my daughter is aspergers, and while she has alot of the typical things, ie obsessive about certain things, finds change very difficult, things have to be just right ect in the way she does them...she has some artistic flair with drawing, but has absolutely no math, or english skills...she would struggle with the work an 8yr old does at school, and even with individual help, constant routin learning for life skills, still cannot learn how to properly load the dishwasher, or all hand washing she does needs to be redone, she cant get the grasp of what can happen if certain areas and things ie bathroom and kitchen are not kept hygienic...Im talking removal of food scraps, not leaving a cloth all wet and full of bits of food in the corner damp and festering blehhhh.

so many people expect her just to be genius at the computer, or maths or something and she is not...and they behave as if she has no worth,....


she is honest. caring , considerate, loving....loves cuddles.. quiet .compliant. never violent or disruptive,..for me. that gives her worth more that many NTs I know.

im NT but im ashamed of how obsessed my fellow NTs are at compartmentalising everyone...unless you fit in a particular box. so they can put a label on you, to define how you should be treated, then they dont want to deal at all...


Your daughter sounds a lot like me. I leave messes a lot and my mom alwaaaays yells at me when I'm already out of the room doing something else. She is possibly autistic but acts NT because she is undiagnosed and whatever but she doesn't seem to realize that once I'm away from something, it's too late to get me to take care of them mess again because my mind is focused on something else. x_x

I also have trouble with daily living skills. I had to quit life skills after i found out I had enough credits to graduate and the school gave me permission to stay home from the life skills program. D:

But anyway, that's why i said any NTs who have family or friends with AS/other Autism forms don't count in the whole 'what we hate about NTs' XD But yeah, I feel for your daughter.

Thing is, you could ask my friends and they will tell you how smart, funny and good-hearted I am. I really care about others and try my best to help them. That's another thing that gets me about NTs. Some of them think that I have no empathy or sympathy for others. But i do. It's just... I have a much harder time trying to show it because it doesn't register yet it doesn't mean I'm a cold hearted person. I've been told how sweet and caring i am to my friends and who I am able to help them keep going.

One of the things that does get me is basically what you said. NTs getting the wrong idea about people with Autism. It's like, when they here 'Autism' they think of someone banging their heads against a wall screaming bloody murder. D: But that's not true at all. Some people with Autism are intelligent yet just don't know how to use that intelligence because of how their brains are wired.

Other things I hate is how for me, is that NTs think they can take advantage of my writing skills. They don't realize that just because I'm a writer doesn't mean I still struggle with trying to write things they want me to. Like, current events for example. I have a strict interest base and that always made it harder for me plus having reading comprehension and terrible TERRIBLE math and processing skills too that made it harder to do them.

Your daughter does sound like me because I have trouble with reading comprehension despite having a college level in reading itself. I am a good speller and a fast typer with just two fingers. I am absolutely terrible at Math. I tried doing second grade math and it was just... mind boggling and I couldn't do it. I also have trouble with processing which most NTs think that us autistics are able to process for more than what the typical NT person can but that's not always true. I have several learning and developmental delays that most people will skip right over. >_<

NTs don't seem to realize my struggles and will always be the ones triggering my meltdowns/outbursts and wondering ust what the hell they did to deserve it. >_>


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Kalika
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16 May 2012, 12:09 pm

A few things which I would list, and have gotten from some NTs.....although I'd probably use "find annoying" instead of "hate"

- the attitude/belief that Aspergers (or any form of autism) is connected with mental retardation.

- that if you have Aspergers, you should be able to get on disability and qualify for other government assistance.

- sometimes it's forgotten that I may have Aspergers, I'm expected to act NT, and get fussed at when that doesn't happen.



iheartmegahitt
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16 May 2012, 12:21 pm

Kalika wrote:
A few things which I would list, and have gotten from some NTs.....although I'd probably use "find annoying" instead of "hate"

- the attitude/belief that Aspergers (or any form of autism) is connected with mental retardation.

- that if you have Aspergers, you should be able to get on disability and qualify for other government assistance.

- sometimes it's forgotten that I may have Aspergers, I'm expected to act NT, and get fussed at when that doesn't happen.


Well, I do border on Mental retardation. But I only border on Classic Autism and Asperger Syndrome. Mostly because I have developmental delays yet odd intelligence with writing, reading and remembering things that tends to baffle people, especially in school when I could memorize things I was taught verbally and pass my tests with flying colors without having to study from a sheet of paper. I still struggled with homework, organization and poor learning skills. >_< Most of my NT experiences are what let do really bad experiences that have literally scarred me from doing things I should be doing because of the ignorance for my Autism and ADHD combined.


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CSBurks
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16 May 2012, 12:37 pm

The fact that they've screwed up the world and yet act so superior.



dinab71
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16 May 2012, 4:27 pm

CSBurks wrote:
The fact that they've screwed up the world and yet act so superior.




Bahahahaha where is the LIKE button, Im NT, and Im boggled at why Im called and Idealist so often cause I talk about how simple it would be to fix alot of things,,,,but get told its not that simple



hell yeah it is...but most people with the power to change things dont want it changed....cause God forbid the playing field get fair. God forbid we see how many answers to problems the earth has for us, without us needing to rape it continually, How so very many wars are unnecessary, and how blind most people are to the real intentions of Governments.

so many people complain in Australia, about welfare...what they forget, that it wouldnt be necessary if we just looked after eachother, and helped our family members who need it...even people that are not family......but everyone wants it to be someone elses problem...yet complain when their taxes are used in part to support disability pensions, etc....



sorry I must stop myself before I start ranting again. I must also apologise for my poor spelling and grammer...my fingers are an extension of my mouth,,,which runs pretty fast,,,mostly without filters lol



Uprising
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16 May 2012, 5:03 pm

This:
Image

and this:
Image



Rascal77s
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16 May 2012, 5:22 pm

zeldapsychology wrote:
ALSO SHEESH! Why is planning such an issue?! !! !! ! I view it as thinking ahead!! ! Something most NT's IMO don't seem to do!! !! !! I "thought" we were going to Ihop this weekend so was planning what I was going to have there and Erica was like "Really you are planning what you are going to eat if we go to Ihop??" IMO yes! I like to have plans! At Disney I want to know what we are doing what ride we are doing 1,2,3,next 4,5,6 etc. Not oh lets go here then here no here ok "Oh well we missed X ride Oh well!" IMO NOT OH WELL!! !! ! PLAN THINGS! Also YOU HAVE to plan to see Mickey etc. since they are only in designated areas!! !! But "NO!" She was like "Oh me/Rusty/Logan already did that last trip" DON'T GO PLANNING EVERYTHING! So I sulked back in a corner and hated the rest of the day! :-(


For me the kind of planning I have a hard time with is multiple steps over a long period of time. For example I want a college degree so there are class requirements that I need to meet as well as structuring my class schedule in a way that isn't overwhelming (like taking 3 hard classes one semester and 3 easy ones the next semester). Then I have trouble sticking to the plan over a long period. Even with the help of a counselor I find this difficult. Seems much easier for most people to do long term planning. Really hard for me to get from A - Z with all those other letters in the middle.



abbiee
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16 May 2012, 6:11 pm

It really frigging bugs me, when NT people think it's easy fixed. We have this 'family friend', as such, who is an alcoholic and she doesn't understand anything. I will do something a bit 'weird' and she'll say 'oh you need tablets, you're not normal, go get some help.' She doesn't effing understand that I AM NOT BROKEN, I CAN NOT BE FIXED, THIS IS HOW I WAS BORN! Her kids are far from perfect, and I'm fairly sure her 9 year old has a similar thing to Austism...yet the mother drills in to her head that she has 'anxiety'. It's not a good look for a 9 year old to be walking around saying 'Oh it's because of my anxiety'. I am sick to death of trying to hide my aspie-ness from people. If they don't like my slightly unusual habits (Mainly Horses, Music and playing Guitar)...then they can FARK OFF. :)

It also bothers me when I get bullied and called phsyco because I react differently to things than other people. People just don't understand.



circular
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16 May 2012, 6:25 pm

zombiegirl2010 wrote:
1. Small talk...

Oh yes, people can be annoying about this. They ask what I do when I don't want to talk about myself, or say something I don't want to hear
about.

Quote:
3. gossip...oh the incessant gossip that I am forced to listen to!

It's in fact a branch of small talk. But one of the worst. Because then, when you are in front of the people who has been gossiped, then I feel so bad, especially if it was bad gossip.

Quote:
2. they get excited and cheery about the weirdest stuff (make-up, shoes, clothes, gambling, shopping, sports, **ad nausium**)

Well that would be ok if we were not forced in some way to be interested in these things in order to socialize.

abbiee wrote:
I AM NOT BROKEN, I CAN NOT BE FIXED, THIS IS HOW I WAS BORN!

Oh yes I feel quite the same. Of course there is room for progress, but essentially I will not change that much.



Matt62
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16 May 2012, 7:08 pm

"Hate" is a strong word. Let us not use it, ok? There is already too much "Us" vs. "Them" going on in the world today. I sure do not intend to add to it!
That being said, there are some annoying traits lots of them seem to have:

Asking questions about sensitive issues, but expecting a Little White Lie so as not to have their feelings hurt? Hey, I am not vindictive or cruel, but if someone asks me if some piece of clothing makes their butt look big.,. I probably will say so if its true!

The constant bending of rules by my employers. Oh, so frustrating! I thought the Ideal of the big companies that I have worked for in the past matched mine. Guess not..

Small talk. Uggh, this is so pointless!

Women playing hard to get. Since I have trouble reading your body language to begin with, this looks like rejection to me!

The constant equating of Autism with Mental Retardation. Enough said!

I think that covers the biggest ones for me..

Sincerely,
Matthew



bumble
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16 May 2012, 7:24 pm

Small talk
Endless gossip
More endless gossip and small talk
The fact that much social interaction is fake (such as asking someone how they are when they don't really want an honest answer)

Also:

Judging people as defective because they are different or like different things to the norm
Judging people as defective because they are not social butterflies

These things do not make a person less human...



Last edited by bumble on 16 May 2012, 7:26 pm, edited 1 time in total.

ArthurDent
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16 May 2012, 7:26 pm

Being indirect bothers me the most, also lying to be polite, the truth does hurt but it is that pain that drives all of us to better ourselves and isn't that what we all want I know I do.



bumble
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16 May 2012, 7:27 pm

ArthurDent wrote:
Being indirect bothers me the most, also lying to be polite, the truth does hurt but it is that pain that drives all of us to better ourselves and isn't that what we all want I know I do.


It is inspiration that drives us to better ourselves, not pain. Pain is destructive and tends to be more soul destroying than anything else.



bumble
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16 May 2012, 7:28 pm

ArthurDent wrote:
Being indirect bothers me the most, also lying to be polite, the truth does hurt but it is that pain that drives all of us to better ourselves and isn't that what we all want I know I do.


It is inspiration that drives us to better ourselves, not pain. Pain is destructive and tends to be more soul destroying than anything else.



mglosenger
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16 May 2012, 7:35 pm

To me, "NT" means not being curious. And being curious means .. not being sure about anything, ultimately. And so I guess I'm sort of NT now, because I mostly just want to be done with this place (Earth, whatever it is).

If the world were to not be so capitalistically enchanted, I'd be more willing to stick around.. but, let's face it, I just don't like people in general. Oh sure, some people are sexually attractive on a physical basis, but somehow, on a deeper, more intellectual level, I've never met anyone who really seemed interesting to me. Invariably, when I bring up interesting topics, the other person will become frightened. Or, the other person will talk about obviously 'nonconformist' topics, like zombies or giant maggots or whatever.. ZZzzzzzzzzz.

Still, I am optimistic at my core and so I think maybe someone out there could exist, yet, it never happens, and so I must conclude that such entities exist outside this weird place. Perhaps I crafted this place into what it is today and if so, what can I do now? It strikes me as being too much work to redirect the vector, such that I would put in more effort than I would receive in enjoyability.. And I am willing to accept that this may be entirely my fault.

Still, regardless of that, the reset button is there, waiting, whether I'm a big jerk/inept controller/whatever

But even once I'm gone, yes, be curious, be interested, ask yourself, 'what makes this true?' and if you can't find a satisfactory answer, then it is not true. What other explanation can there be?