How do you explain that things are different to NT's?

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I get frustrated when I'm explaining things to NT's and they always come back with "I do that too" or "ya, me too". I get really angry and then shut down. Is there a good way to make them understand that with AS, the same symptoms or tendencies that an NT might have are completely different to mine?

Financial info, personal ID info, personal info, and medical info should all be kept on a need-to-know basis, with very few excepts made. You should not be discussing your Asperger's with people who don't need to know. If your traits are causing problems, you can discuss your traits with someone who will have to deal with your problems. For ex:

I am sensitive to loud noises, and would appreciate your keeping the noise level down. Or--Boss I am wearing these noise cancelling headphones, as I am sensitive to loud noises, and it's noisy in here.

I am wearing sun glasses indoors because I am sensitive to bright lights.

I am not good at social cues, so let me know if I make a mistake.

I am not trying to be rude by not making eye contact. I have always been uncomfortable doing that.

I don't handle stress well, so I sometimes have meltdowns/shutdowns.

My bouncing my knee while sitting helps me burn off stress--and calories.
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See, with this method, you keep your Autism spectrum disorder private, but do explain the specific problem involved.

Most NTs don't know about Autism disorders, and the condition is too involved to explain with a quick, simple explanation. Also, most of those NTs who have heard of the condition have little or mistaken info about it. Many of them think of it as a form of retardation. It's not, but retardation is sometimes co-morbid with it, just like in the rest of the population. Some of them have heard of spectrum people who have committed crimes, including violent ones, and think we may all be ready to go postal, or at least commit crimes of our own. That's not the case. Just as in the rest of the population, there is a small percentage of us who will be bad, or violent mental cases. Unfortunately, those are the ones who make the news, so the general puplic mistakenly thinks we are all like that. So it's best to only tell people about being on the Autism spectrum on a need-to-know basis.

It's also a good idea not to discuss it with your friend any more, even though he already knows about it. There is no way you can give him an accurate picture of the condition. Also, he seems to be a "copy" or "topper" type--when you say something about something he has to say the same or increase it. This type of behavior can be very aggravating, so don't discuss your condition with him any more.

Hope this helps.

I don't know....when people say ''I do that too'' or something like that, it often makes me feel better, whether they mean it or not.

usually, the response is along the lines of "i have all of those things, sometimes"
i then reply with something simular to "yes, but i have all of it, all the time"
that usually works to make them understand, a little, if you try to explain your natural state is simular to being drunk, tired, stoned and having a migrane attack all at once, in the best-case scenario...

Yeah, the difference is really more one of degree. Like: Most people sneeze sometimes. If you have a cold, you sneeze constantly. Or, many people feel sad or dull sometimes. If you have depression, you are sad or emotionless most of the day, every day. Most ASD traits are experienced by neurotypicals, in their mild form. Ideally, that helps neurotypicals understand ASDs better--but only if they recognize that the difference in intensity has brought us outside the normal range, turning NT experiences into their more extreme autistic counterparts.

Also, relating to the thread in this post:

I don't explain my autism at all to NTs. I also don't tell many people about it at all, probably 5 people in the past 5 years. But, the people who I do tell - I don't explain it to them, only talk about certain things relating to it sometimes; things like my sensory issues - and when I talk about those I mostly just talk about them without talking about autism. Other than saying I have it, I don't really say anything about it. I've always just nonchalantly brought it up when it felt like a good time to do so. It's pretty much always just spur-of-the-moment decision to tell them.

I would start with your weirdest traits that they don't have. That will establish you in their minds as a total weirdo, which will mean that whatever less weird things that you do will seem moar weird, because you are a total weirdo in their minds, and they will not relate to as many of the behaviors and thoughts and feelings of a total weirdo. Then, once they know that you are not like them, you can try to tell them why you do whatever you do, and maybe few of them will listen and start to understand, if they are not totally turned off by you being a total weirdo.

You being a total weirdo will help them think outside the box of your being like them, and that is the first step towards getting someone to learn about your differences, I think. For eggsample, if I told someone that I have problems saying what I want to say, then they will say that they have those problems too, but if I told someone that I started to learn to speak at age eight and I still have problems saying what I want to say, then they will know that my problems are not like theirs, because they cannot relate to the speech delay. Then, perhaps, they will be able to accept what I say about myself from my perspective instead of theirs. If relating doesn't work, then the opposite approach of not relating might be worth a try, and I am sure that all autistic people have some eggstreme traits that others cannot relate to.