Aspergers Subtypes --The Rationale-Dependent Aspergers Child

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Joined: 7 Aug 2011
Gender: Female
Posts: 343
Location: Canada

06 Jul 2012, 3:30 pm

postcards57, I don't understand. Are there people who challenge rules to undermine authority or to manipulate others. Why do they do that? I challenge rules to fully understand and integrate them myself. If I spot inconsistencies to someone's rules I will call them out on it.

Yes, I agree with Ettina. And it is not only psychopaths. Some people who are narcissistic or simply over-confident feel a need to challenge any kind of authority by questioning what is said.

If my other children say "Why do I have to do that?" it is often because they are resentful of the request, not because they want to understand. If my students ask "What is the point of this assignment?" it is because they think it is pointless. My reaction is generally defensive, and I have had to learn to get over it by assuming they are simply asking the question awkwardly. If they were conscious of this, they would either use that type of question as a challenge to my right to make the request, which is how it sounds to me, or they would change their question to: "Could you explain the goal of this assignment?" which is the polite way to ask for understanding.

I tell my children that there is a distinction between "asking a question" and "questioning." In empathetic communication practices, I avoid asking why someone did something, as this sounds as though I do not approve of his actions.

Hope this helps,


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Joined: 3 Jul 2012
Age: 50
Gender: Female
Posts: 2,812
Location: USA

06 Jul 2012, 9:35 pm

My son is like this. It often looks like he is arguing with adults, but I know he really isn't. I think for him it is a combination of something being logical and also having it conform to his understanding of justice and truthfulness. He gets tripped up when he doesn't understand the logic, when he thinks something is not just or equitable, or when he thinks something is dishonest.

I wonder if it is related to another one of his "quirks." He repeatedly corrects people when they are factually mistaken and he cannot really grasp why this annoys people, especially teachers. When I tell him "adults generally don't like to be corrected by children" he will say "well, how else will they know they are wrong? I am only trying to help!"