kirayng wrote:
I think I really suck, but I'm not sure....
I know that I'm good and there are some days where I'm really good...
I hope you don't mind me editing down your original post so much. I was really struck how you said that you both suck, and are good and really good.
I know in most of the jobs I have worked in I have felt both the above, and worried that I was getting no feedback. My general experience is if you're not getting feedback you haven't done anything wrong, but often you won't get any feedback about what you're doing right either.
For me I think I was generally good and occasionally sucked, but no more than anyone else did - as far as quality of work was concerned. But I probably thought (and still often do think) I suck far more often than I actually do good. I'm absolutely sure I am my own worst critic, and often unreasonably harsh on myself.
Might you be doing the same and tending to focus far more on the little things you do wrong occasionally, rather than the majority of occasions when you do really well?
As far as getting formal feedback I've only managed to get this this when I've worked in local government or large charities where there were formal appraisal systems, so there was a formal HR led system for assessing progress. It actually worked really well - but I'm not sure the average busy executive chef would go in for this...they might not be too keen on some kind of time consuming appraisal / review system, and I'm not sure how you could encourage one, unless you could somehow sell it that it might improve everyone's efficiency.
[Now as part of my PhD I get formal feedback from supervisors cos they are paid to do that - it's part of their job description (but I generally have to hassle them for it and it can take a while to hear anything back - but they don't mind as they are supposed to do this)]
I don't imagine that formal feedback is in a busy executive chefs job description somehow though...so not quite sure how you could ask for this, unless you can somehow suggest it's in their best interest too - e.g. 'if you can take some time to tell me what I'm doing well and what I'm doing not so well, I can then improve and be a better line cook, this means I do my job better for you - we both gain..'
Not sure if this approach would work...but it might.