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BlueMax
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01 Aug 2012, 8:25 pm

On my way to a flash date with a nice (and attractive) woman my age off OKCupid. Wish me luck with being sociable for 60-120 mins. ;)



Colinn
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01 Aug 2012, 8:26 pm

Best of luck to you, hope it goes well :thumright:



JanuaryMan
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01 Aug 2012, 8:26 pm

Good luck, Max! :)



redrobin62
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01 Aug 2012, 9:01 pm

Rotsa ruck! (You knew that was coming!)



Morningstar
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01 Aug 2012, 9:01 pm

Good luck and have fun :D



metaldanielle
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01 Aug 2012, 9:22 pm

Best of luck to you, Blue.



Kjas
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01 Aug 2012, 9:56 pm

Goodluck! :D


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BlueMax
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01 Aug 2012, 10:56 pm

Meh... I'm back. It was nice, I learned a little more about myself... but there probably won't be a second date. You know when she says, "I might give it another chance..." *gack*

Ironically - it probably was less to do with being an aspie and more about still being so hurt by what my ex-wife did (and is still doing which makes it all the harder to completely move on from...) But I really enjoyed her company, she enjoyed mine and she was friendly, kind and honest... who knows?

...at least she passed on the name of a good family lawyer. ;)



MXH
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01 Aug 2012, 11:43 pm

Ive seen your stuff about the exwife around and agree that she is still messing with you too much. The best f**k you that you can send her is moving on, itll be tough but the faster you do it the better itll be for you



BlueMax
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01 Aug 2012, 11:47 pm

Gad.... an hour later, the depression of "rejection" is getting deeper and more illogical...

I don't know how I'm going to function tomorrow... I'm falling into complete shutdown.



metaldanielle
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02 Aug 2012, 12:10 am

MXH wrote:
Ive seen your stuff about the exwife around and agree that she is still messing with you too much. The best f**k you that you can send her is moving on, itll be tough but the faster you do it the better itll be for you

Agreed.



JanuaryMan
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02 Aug 2012, 3:52 am

Hey, Max. I know it's hard but your wife is in the past and should stay there. Your mind is still in recovery, and it can be easy to give into the temptation of obsessing over your ex wife being evil but even if they are it's better just to move on and deal with things that are in your control or actually have a future to them.

I'm sorry your date didn't go as planned, by the way :(. I do think you're a good guy and deserve a bit of happiness. What is important is that you know why. Many people here never even accept the idea it could be them let alone figure out the reason why it was them.



mv
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02 Aug 2012, 6:57 am

BlueMax wrote:
Meh... I'm back. It was nice, I learned a little more about myself... but there probably won't be a second date. You know when she says, "I might give it another chance..." *gack*

Ironically - it probably was less to do with being an aspie and more about still being so hurt by what my ex-wife did (and is still doing which makes it all the harder to completely move on from...) But I really enjoyed her company, she enjoyed mine and she was friendly, kind and honest... who knows?

...at least she passed on the name of a good family lawyer. ;)


I commend you for "getting out there", but yeah, it might still be too soon. I've been through what you're going through, and it's very hard. My sympathies. I went on something like 50 dates with people I met online and I think I just wasn't in the right headspace at the time because none interested me enough for me to pursue it. I gave some guys second and third dates, but I never quite warmed up. I think your attitude is much better than mine, though! I met some great people, some who are still friends today, which is good.



Toadette
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02 Aug 2012, 9:58 am

BlueMax wrote:
Gad.... an hour later, the depression of "rejection" is getting deeper and more illogical...

I don't know how I'm going to function tomorrow... I'm falling into complete shutdown.


Aww. :( There, there. I don't know what you're going through with your ex wife but I think the others are right. Maybe you can find a new hobby or make a lifestyle change to take your mind off things to help you move on?

I also think you should refrain from talking about your ex wife in front of other women as much as possible. I don't know if you ever did that or not but that's one main golden rule I learned from my mistakes, and it's the only dating advice I can think of.

It's ok, don't let it get you down. Many of us have received a lot of rejections, but you won't succeed unless you keep trying. You seem like a really good natured guy. No need to give up hope just yet. :)



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02 Aug 2012, 11:56 am

I agree with the other posters. Instead of dwelling on being alone; try to remind yourself how you were able to go on a date & it went OK despite the sh!t going on with your ex wife. You are handling things very well. It's probably too soon for you to date rite now but at least you have the name of her family lawyer so maybe she's wanting to go out with you again 1ce the ex wife situation is managed.


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