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Kiriae
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02 Sep 2016, 4:24 am

So basically if someone smiles a lot and helps people in trouble he/she is a worthy person despite not working and still living with parents at 27?
Maybe I didn't waste my life after all.



auntblabby
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02 Sep 2016, 4:25 am

Kiriae wrote:
So basically if someone smiles a lot and helps people in trouble he/she is a worthy person despite not working and still living with parents at 27?
Maybe I didn't waste my life after all.

you can bet your life on that.



Alphawolf
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02 Sep 2016, 5:04 am

Neurotypical humans place a premium on only those things that add to the capitalist economic life of our nation. Any people whose contributions are not directly economically enriching are often considered a DRAG on society. If you are duped into thinking that you only have value if you have a job, make money and add to the economic life of society then by definition your life is wasted IF you don't get that job and make that money.

Our economics centric NT society does not value those who help people in trouble, smile and does other things that promote the quality and harmony of human society. Yet in truth those who smiles a lot and helps people in trouble IS a worthy person despite not working and still living with parents at 27 in truth. Unfortunately most humans focus only on economic concerns and view their world accordingly.

Waste for some is anyone who is not a full participating member of the economic, political and social life of their respective communities. As an autistic person I will never be a fully functional member in the economic, political and social life of my respective community. Yeah I have the job and I vote but my autistic nature focuses only on the narrow band of things I understand and I vote, earn and function accordingly.

My political needs and ideals aren't the same as NT's. I earn money at a great job but how I manage my money is not like most NT's. I live well within my means. I save a LOT and I'm not driven to have the next great thing. If everyone shopped and lived like I do our GDP would shrink by half. I buy only what I need. I rarely drink. I go out for dinner rarely. If people lived like me there would be no fast food resturants. I can't remember the last time I went to a McDonalds. What qualifies as a wasted life is relative. If you focus on NT economics, voting and social skills as being a success then as an autistic man I am still a failure. I just am old and wise enough not to give a crap!



Claradoon
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02 Sep 2016, 5:05 am

There is no such thing as a wasted life. There is also no such thing as finding out what our "purpose" is.

Once I grabbed the shoulder of a woman about to cross the tracks in front of a moving train. She stepped back and waited with me. Could that be my purpose? Once I played truant from a wedding party to take the children to read headstones - and the bride thanked me! How many thousands of our own actions are we able to know the end result?

My point is that we don't know what our purpose is. That doesn't mean we don't have one, or many. We can't watch our smallest actions ripple through the rings of cause and effect. But keep going.



Alphawolf
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02 Sep 2016, 5:07 am

There is no such thing as a wasted life. There is also no such thing as finding out what our "purpose" is.

Once I grabbed the shoulder of a woman about to cross the tracks in front of a moving train. She stepped back and waited with me. Could that be my purpose? Once I played truant from a wedding party to take the children to read headstones - and the bride thanked me! How many thousands of our own actions are we able to know the end result?

My point is that we don't know what our purpose is. That doesn't mean we don't have one, or many. We can't watch our smallest actions ripple through the rings of cause and effect. But keep going.



Right On!! !! !! !! !! !!



Claradoon
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02 Sep 2016, 8:22 pm

Claradoon wrote:
There is no such thing as a wasted life. There is also no such thing as finding out what our "purpose" is.

Once I grabbed the shoulder of a woman about to cross the tracks in front of a moving train. She stepped back and waited with me. Could that be my purpose? Once I played truant from a wedding party to take the children to read headstones - and the bride thanked me! How many thousands of our own actions are we able to know the end result?

My point is that we don't know what our purpose is. That doesn't mean we don't have one, or many. We can't watch our smallest actions ripple through the rings of cause and effect. But keep going.


Now I remember the name of the book I wanted to tell you about -

The Five People You Meet in Heaven - Mitch Albom

I really hope you get a chance to read it - it's so bang on about your topic.



auntblabby
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02 Sep 2016, 8:24 pm

Claradoon wrote:
Now I remember the name of the book I wanted to tell you about -I really hope you get a chance to read it - it's so bang on about your topic.

I have the movie, I watched it a decade ago. I dug it :star:



Tobes
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07 Sep 2016, 12:35 am

Great posts from AlphaWolf and others. Samual, hope you've found something to live for. Maybe come back and let us know how you're doing.

I rarely cry as I'm not in the best touch with my true emotions. However, a few years ago I was checking out the profile of a former classmate in my group of friends at high school and looking at all of the fantastic photos on her page. Wow, what a life she seemed to have lived. Has a child, seemed to be working alot, good solid person who is just working hard and achieving things. She has lived a million times more than me and we're the same age.

After checking out her page I realised that I have wasted my life. At least, the last 10 years upto that point (though also after and upto now). I broke down in tears. Rare emotion for me but seeing the complete contrast in her life to mine just brought it all up to the surface.



auntblabby
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07 Sep 2016, 12:42 am

it is seldom profitable to compare our lives with others' lives.



AngryAngryAngry
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17 Sep 2016, 11:10 pm

Tobes wrote:
Great posts from AlphaWolf and others. Samual, hope you've found something to live for. Maybe come back and let us know how you're doing.

I rarely cry as I'm not in the best touch with my true emotions. However, a few years ago I was checking out the profile of a former classmate in my group of friends at high school and looking at all of the fantastic photos on her page. Wow, what a life she seemed to have lived. Has a child, seemed to be working alot, good solid person who is just working hard and achieving things. She has lived a million times more than me and we're the same age.

After checking out her page I realised that I have wasted my life. At least, the last 10 years upto that point (though also after and upto now). I broke down in tears. Rare emotion for me but seeing the complete contrast in her life to mine just brought it all up to the surface.


People often present their life in a better light than it really is. Especially online.
Becareful, most people do not tell the truth about struggles they have (on a daily basis), unless it is to their close friends. As they don't want nasty gossip to go around, and they want to hide their weakness.



auntblabby
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17 Sep 2016, 11:35 pm

AngryAngryAngry wrote:
People often present their life in a better light than it really is. Especially online.
Becareful, most people do not tell the truth about struggles they have (on a daily basis), unless it is to their close friends. As they don't want nasty gossip to go around, and they want to hide their weakness.

gives new meaning to the old saying, "many men lead lives of quiet desperation."



Tobes
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18 Sep 2016, 12:42 am

AngryAngryAngry wrote:
People often present their life in a better light than it really is. Especially online.
Becareful, most people do not tell the truth about struggles they have (on a daily basis), unless it is to their close friends. As they don't want nasty gossip to go around, and they want to hide their weakness.


Thanks and yeah I've heard of the concept of Facebook being a mere snippet of the best bits of their life rather than the whole picture. I'm sure they've struggled and that wouldn't be a knock against them or a weakness, if anything a strength.

It's about working towards a better future and not focusing so much on the past. Things that can't be changed are best left at that. Someone here, I think, has a great line in their signature that said "trying to recreate the past is never the same as it was back then."



b9
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18 Sep 2016, 2:44 am

there is no such thing as "waste".
the universe is in the process of binding energy into material, and whatever material that is, is inconsequential to the process.
so every atom from which you are made, will be available for incorporation back into other universal processes after you have died and been completely dismantled by time.

"waste" is a human concept and is not a real thing.

so what if einstein got into drugs at 14 and buggered up his brain to the point where he never thought of his ideas that so much now is based on?

would someone else have thought of it by now?
maybe the world would be just a different kind of place now.
would that have been a "waste"?

in the fullness of time, we will all be just sands in the universe scattered far and wide.



TheForeverMan
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19 Sep 2016, 7:37 am

A wasted life, is a life that ends.

Since the term "wasted" is based upon either the perception of the self, or other humans. Thus if you're dead, other peoples views mean nothing, nor do your own, since youre dead.

Therefore, no life is wasted in the traditional sense. Unless you decide to hold that perception. But as far as the physical realm is concerned, then "wasted" cannot occur.



Eclipse247
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24 Sep 2016, 7:05 am

I have wasted the last 10-12 years in burnout as an undiagnosed AS trying to figure out what/why things panned out the way they did. I have lost a lot in that time but finding an answer to the search I have been on has been a help. My son was diagnosed about the same time back but I didn't join the dots. Being unable to see the elephant in the room seems to be a problem for me. I can now see the traits in my own father who died young but was very creative. I am only now examining his legacy.



auntblabby
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24 Sep 2016, 7:07 am

^^^^welcome to the club 8)