New noob.

Post Reply New Topic

Hello,

I am 33 and "un-diagnosed".
( Actually I have been confirmed by our family psychologist but am afraid of social stigma. I don't know if I want too be an official Aspi. Long story)

Anyways, like many here I realized I am not near as unique as I thought. Reading a list of Asperger traits when my son was diagnosed I felt like someone had been spying on my life and had exposed me from the inside out. Frankly I was afraid and it was very difficult for me.

My carefully constructed world was reduced down to carefully constructed rationalizations and silly BS.

I'm currently in some post acceptance stage and resisting the urge to run around telling everyone I ever knew, "See I have Asperger's, I'm not an evil bastard who doesn't care about your feelings!"

Sorry, I'm getting off topic.

I hope there are people here i can relate too, and maybe have a conversation with without planning every step of the interaction out before hand so as not
to be offensive or misunderstood.

Regards,
AZB

Welcome to Wrong Planet, AZB!

Thanx Makayla!

It's no problem!

Welcome to WP,
Yes it is hard getting NTs to really understand an Aspie's way. We also have interest in them and can care about those we get close to. But we don't always show it in the same way that they are used to, or recognize. As an exampl,e my wife did not understand the love that was demonstarted when I cleaned out and organized her closet. She was mad! No appreciation for the organizational work of art I had slaved over for hours 'to surprise her'. In her defense it was what I had tossed out that upset her. She is a pack rat and doesn't understand that a house is like a body. It must eliminate things out as well as take things in or it will eventually explode or become so atomically heavy it sinks to the core of the earth.

That's hilarious.
I know exactly what you mean.

My time and especially my talents are important to me. If I use them both on your behalf I must really like you.
Otherwise I wouldn't have bothered.

Me and the lil misses have learned to co-exist. I make her furniture and random things she selects off pinterest that she thinks are amazing.
When it's actually sanded down and repainted crap with a pseudo philosophical statement stenciled to it.

But it works, i get to engineer something and show my appreciation for her with minimal mush involved.
She gets something pretty and original to rub in her friends faces.

Win/Win

Hello and welcome

That story from Toy soldier sounds like me and my housband. But we have been maried for so long now that he does not even want to know when I have tossed something out. I like things to be simple and orderly..and he..well he is chaotic and wonderfull

Thank you for the welcome Trekie.

I've yet to fully embrace and appreciate the differences between my NT wifes version of order and my bare bones and streamed line view of it.

But sometimes I think i only love myself because she loves me.
So I will persevere.

Welkome to WP

Mick