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Pandora
Veteran
Veteran

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Joined: 17 Jun 2005
Age: 63
Gender: Female
Posts: 3,553
Location: Townsville

18 Dec 2006, 7:31 am

Dad died 20 years ago. At the time, I didn't really "grieve" but had all sorts of odd emotions such as anger and relief (because he wasn't suffering anymore) but if I try to talk about him now, I find it very hard to not get upset.

Yet I cried all night when my cat died when I was 13. It doesn't mean that I didn't care about my dad - more that I tried to put it out of my mind. But of course, if you do that kind of thing, it only comes back later on.

If someone with severe handicaps eg. cerebral palsy, or a severe and painful illness died, I would feel sad for their family but would also think at least that person wouldn't be suffering any more.

Some people have told me I am heartless for thinking like that but I don't think it is being heartless, just practical.


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Break out you Western girls,
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theman
Pileated woodpecker
Pileated woodpecker

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Joined: 5 Nov 2005
Age: 52
Gender: Male
Posts: 195
Location: Oklahoma...... where the men are men and the sheep run scared.

18 Dec 2006, 1:33 pm

I have to agree that sorrow is mostly selfish, you grieve for yourself and your loss of any future interaction with this person. So being "heartless" is probably a more appropriate and mature response.

Personally I like the Mexican view on death....fiesta! It is a necessary part of life and should be embraced as such, personally I blame the jesus freaks for the current neurotic fear of death, ironic that the people who should accept it the easiest would sell their soul to get out of it.

BTW you can download this sermon for the small donation of only 39.95 none of which will go to buy the new BMW M3 I obsessing over.