How do I tell my lover he has AS?

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He may not see that he may have AS if he has a destorted view of autism. I've been actively searching for what could be the matter with me, and until two months ago have consistently rejected the idea I might be autistic because I didn't understand the difference between low functioning autism (of the "Rainman" variety) and mild high functioning autism. I attributed my social problems to high intelligence, being naturally extremely introverted and the idea that the rest of the world was weird and that I was completely normal. From my point of view, my point of view is completely logical. That can make it hard or impossible to see another point of view. Aspies aren't very good at that, I'm told. Perhaps he just doesn't see what AS has got to do with him.

I just go about telling her normally; and to tell her how it's caused me to have problems and to not have her hold it against me.

I would encourage him to see a professional and be evaluated. That's what they are for. He may have it, he may not. Either way, even if you are sure he has it because of what you have read or seen, that doesn't mean he has it. You could easily be wrong, so I'd suggest letting the professionals handle something like a diagnosis.