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Jinks
Deinonychus
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13 Oct 2012, 5:25 am

Hi,

Most of us are familiar with "meltdowns" in which an onset of too much stimuli causes extreme reactions and we generally need to retreat to somewhere quiet to recover, but I wondered how many others experience this on a larger scale too.

What I mean by that is that if too many issues or changes in my life come along at once I find that, much like the meltdown caused by environmental stimuli, I "shut down" and find it overwhelming and disabling for a period of time. Shutdowns/meltdowns caused by environmental stimuli might take a couple of hours to recover from. Shutdowns caused by upsetting or disruptive life experiences or too many things happening at once often require a week or two of downtime. It's less extreme but lasts longer. To other people I might appear to be depressed, withdrawn, lack concentration or motivation and be even less communicative than usual for this period of time, but after I have recovered I am OK.

Things which can bring this on include:
-Upsetting life experiences
-Sudden changes or disruptions
-Having too many things to do at once (which causes me great confusion and makes me just want to hide)
-Overwhelming emotional experiences
-Combinations of the above, or other possible things.

I have learned that I just need to allow myself to recover for the necessary length of time and accept that I'm not going to get much done until I have. I have to manage things rather like a NT might when they are recovering from the flu, for example. To the greatest extent possible, I need to not interact with people or be forced to do things which I find difficult during this time since that will probably make it worse. I'm trying to learn to manage my life so that this happens as little as possible, but it is not easy.

I suspect that many autistic people who are under too much pressure and overwhelm due to their circumstances find themselves in this state permanently (I believe this because I have been there myself and was only able to recover when I was able to remove many responsibilities from my life). Therefore, it may require a certain level of being able to cope before the difference is noticeable. I don't know what to call it, perhaps "background overwhelm"?

Do other people here know what I am talking about?



NewDawn
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13 Oct 2012, 9:08 am

Yes, I do. On hindsight, I think the total burnout I exerienced in my early forties was in fact a very long shutdown. Typically, it got gradually better when I began to isolate myself for long periods.

In my case, there is another factor that causes confussion, and in the worst case meltdown/shutdown. I don't know what to call it, I'm still very much discovering. It's perhaps a form of executive dysfunction on a high level. I have a mind that continously comes up with all kinds of interesting projects. Often, I get enthousiastic about it and start a project, but I don't seem to have a good idea how much effort and time it's going to take. The result is that I have too many projects lying around. At that point, I'm unable to decide what to do first, and completely lose sight of priorities. Logically, I know that fixing a clogged faucet in the bathroom is more important than watching Midsomer Murders for the 100th time, but I can't bring myself to do it.

It's an interesting topic that I'm thinking about a lot at the moment. Right now, I'm in the process of cutting down on projects and simplifying my life. It seems to work.



PTSmorrow
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13 Oct 2012, 10:15 am

Yes, definitely the same here. Once I've read that a person needs at least six weeks to adapt to a change, even it they want it and perceive it as positive. During this period, another change would bring additional stress. For instance, if one has to a adapt to a new job, which is a huge stress anyway, they should not buy a new car during the first six weeks. This article was about NT's, however.

I found that I need much more time than six weeks to virtually recover, as the OP says, from stressful periods. Three years ago I had to move house and yet today I feel uprooted at times. During those periods of recovery I need quiet, very much sleep, can only do the most necessary chores, am constantly fatigued and susceptible to cold, flu, stomach bugs, coughing, soar throat, rashes and the like.

Quote:
The result is that I have too many projects lying around. At that point, I'm unable to decide what to do first, and completely lose sight of priorities.


Had this to the extreme for months during times of change and regularly ended up sitting at the table with a cup of tea and being totally unable to do anything. This went on for hours until I went to bed. Each day I came home from work and had made plans what to do, and then all I had were those blackouts.



Jinks
Deinonychus
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13 Oct 2012, 11:15 am

PTSmorrow wrote:
During those periods of recovery I need quiet, very much sleep, can only do the most necessary chores, am constantly fatigued and susceptible to cold, flu, stomach bugs, coughing, soar throat, rashes and the like.


Yes! That's an exact description of how I experience it as well, including the sleeping and susceptibility to illness. It's good to know I'm not alone in this. Interesting that NTs experience it as well, but to a less overwhelming degree. I suppose that makes sense.

I had a very stressful job for three years and spent the entirety of it in that state. I was only able to emerge from it and recover from the shutdown state when I left earlier this year.

NewDawn, I have always had that problem as well - lots of ideas but a complete inability to predict the time and resources they will require, or plan things (because it is impossible to plan when you can't guage how long something will take). It made life at university almost impossible for me since the course I was doing was based on projects and I would always choose great ideas which were impossible to complete in the timeframe and could never achieve a grade reflective of my standard of work because every single project was unfinished.

I'm doing the same thing, cutting down on everything and making my life as simple as possible, and trying to focus on only one thing at a time. It definitely helps.



alexi
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13 Oct 2012, 4:35 pm

This is an enormous problem for me. Quite often I can feel like I have dealt ok with a difficult situation, such as traveling or spending a lot of time around people, only to fall into a shutdown that lasts between one and two weeks. In that time I can only handle the most basic tasks. I try to take the pressure right off, remove myself from other people, and do A LOT of repetitive tasks. If I can't focus on looking after myself in this way it just will continue on and on, becoming less and less functional, and my mental health becomes badly affected.

I went back to uni this year and the adjustment has completely thrown me off balance. It took me 6 weeks of constant overwhelm to adjust, followed by 2 weeks of shutdown, then for a week I was ok, then another two weeks shutdown. Then the semester was over, only to begin the whole process again. It feels like it is just too much for me to integrate into my coping. When I was at uni about 10years ago I lived in a permanent state of overwhelm/crisis. Being diagnosed since has helped me understand what was happening to me back then.

The way I see it is that everything 'costs' me. Whether it is something that I enjoy or don't enjoy, I only have a set amount of coping/energy. Everything I do takes from that reserve, and eventually there is just nothing left and it takes about two weeks to recharge. If I can't do what I need to do to recharge appropriately, I will run empty again very quickly.



Mirror21
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13 Oct 2012, 5:20 pm

If I feel bombarded emotionally or mentally it is the same as being bombarded environmentally. I pretty much freak out.