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Aspertastic424
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17 Oct 2012, 3:06 pm

Ok, I just need to start off by saying I have aspergers syndrome. I know I will get a lot of flack for this topic, but it is something I kind of believe.

My father and I had kind of an argument about this.

My mom is getting a degree in autism special education, and we have a little autitistic boy come over to our house for reading help. Unlike children with aspergers he seems fundamentally "locked in his own little world."

I have no problem with diversity. Its just I couldnt help but thinking as I watched him sort of sing to himself and repeat the questions he was asked, would he be better off if he was cured?

You might say there is nothing to cure. I just think it would be good if severely autistic kids like him had autism removed. That way they would be able to communicate, and have their lives far more open to them than they are now. If their autism was removed they could have a choice of learning or not, of being able to speak well and communicate with others, and choose to form friendships.

I know aspergers has its upsides. But severe autism seems not to, like it just condemns people who have it to be dependent for the rest of their lives and never be able to over come their difficulties to actually understand the world around them. My heart was filled with sorrow and frustration for the little child, not rejection.

Can anyone relate to what I am saying? Or am I bad for thinking it?



Aspertastic424
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17 Oct 2012, 3:15 pm

I talked to my dad about a cure.

He then went on some kind of inane, stupid reply, in my opinion.

He said I was confusing autism with a diesease, and that it just was the way you were. It may not be a disease, technically, but it is a real handicap for people, many of whom dont have positive outcomes with it. He also said that little boy without the autism simply " wouldnt be him."

I thought that was the ultimate form of being "pollyanna". Being sweet and politically correct while failing to acknowledge the real suffering and hardship of the child. It seems intellectually dishonest to me, thinking that that kid would truly be no better or worse off without the autism. At one point I ended up calling him "ret*d" for thinking the way he did.

And then at the end of it he said to me. " But I respect the position I have is a minority position on autism." Could you care to clarify why? Why would people think severe autism is a terrible affliction that is best to be cured?

Is it becasue they are intolerant, mean people? Or are any of them good in any way, and truly desire to help and help autistic kids even the incredible odds God/ Life has stacked on them?

Idk , im sorry, The whole interchange jsut left me very drained and frustrated! :( Any thouhgts, insights suggestions about the way I think?



Scaurie
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17 Oct 2012, 3:23 pm

I don't think you're bad for thinking it. Some people may disagree with my opinion, as it is sort of defeatist, but I do think that a cure would be good -- if it was voluntary.

Some people have come to accept their Asperger's in order to survive. I respect that. Yet, at the same time I know that my disease is not going away. That for my entire life, talking to people will forever be a depressing struggle. If there was a cure, I would take it. My focus is not on being "normal", but on being happy, being able to make connections and keep them.

I think that people focus a lot on how "disabled" or "handicapped" a person is due to their Asperger's/Autism. I think that they should be focusing on whether or not the disorder is getting in the way of their happiness and ability to be happy.

On what your father said, I think that he was trying not be offensive. After all, he probably is very aware that he might have different views from you on the matter and he doesn't want to make you feel like he thinks that you/other Aspies are a failure or aren't acceptable. You're right about the part of being politically correct and sweet. My comprehension on the last part of your second post is fuzzy, but if someone said "I respect your minority position on Autism", I would be upset thinking that they are trying to stealthily pour antiseptic on a wound.



Aspertastic424
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17 Oct 2012, 3:30 pm

Thanks so much for support/ validation! :D

My father actually stated that HIS view was the minority position. I dont want to rag on my father though. Without all his help for math homework, I think it woudl be unlikely I would have graduated from High school, never mind College!

I guess I just found this one interchange a tad frustrating.



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17 Oct 2012, 5:12 pm

It's just that cure is a bit of a misnomer seeing as how there isn't actually anything to be cured which is why it can be interpreted as offensive. It's in the same vein of saying there's a cure for being gay. With education and time people of homosexual orientation have come to be accepted more. Acceptance of people who are gay has come a long way, but it's taken decades and there's still a long ways to go. The problems from being on the spectrum aren't beyond our capacity to overcome in the sense that we can live fulfilling and functional lives, but just as with gay people, society's ignorance and judgment are the biggest problem as discrimination and harassment have a very real effect on a person's psyche and thus in turn affecting every aspect of their life. We're a minority and it's going to take some time to raise awareness.

Disclaimer: It's not a perfect analogy I know, but one I believe can be easily understood. I'm not saying being on the spectrum and being gay are the same or that they're discriminated for the same reasons other than the zeitgeist of judgment and intolerance.



CockneyRebel
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17 Oct 2012, 6:04 pm

I don't need to be cured, because I'm not damaged goods. I'd also like to say that I wouldn't let anybody cure me for their own satisfaction.


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17 Oct 2012, 7:08 pm

Sure, it'd be a good thing for those who want one. I, however, do not want to be "cured."


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17 Oct 2012, 7:59 pm

How can you cure something when it isn't a disease? In order to be "cured" you will lose part of what makes you who you are, your unique way of looking at things, I know you may feel alone a lot, but do you really want to lose part of yourself to have your personality and thought process irrevocably altered?

I wouldn't, and you shouldn't either.



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17 Oct 2012, 11:25 pm

A lot of people will tell you that a cure will destory who you are, but the truth is, no one knows how a cure will work because they have not developed a cure. A cure might not be possible, it might rewrite who you are, or it might not. No one knows.

I am pro-cure. I know some people here enjoy looking down on the world with contempt, or enjoy sitting at home all day and night alone, that's not me, that's not what I enjoy at all. I can get by enough to make and keep friends, to have a job, own a home, but how much better would it be if everything wasn't a fight.

And when you look at all the troubles, rants, complaints, suicide intonations on this site, I don't think I'm alone.

I don't view it as damaged goods, but as a medical condition.

I dream of a cure that can cure the disability of autism, but not remove the autistic mind's strengths.



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18 Oct 2012, 12:25 am

Autism Speaks does not speak for me.


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18 Oct 2012, 12:37 am

I'm in the same boat, but I also don't know if a cure can ever be found since much of development of so many things happen so early on, and people have had a large part of their lives to practice, and find what works for them, the untrained brain would still have a bit of sensory overload much in the way that a person who was born blind surgically regains part of their vision and is overwhelming as the mind struggles to contextualize everything.

I do hope they find a cure, and I don't see how it could hurt an aspie, or how it'll cause them to lose their edge, i think if anything, it'll just allow you access to parts of your mind you did not have before, and for your left and right brain to work together more efficiently.


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18 Oct 2012, 12:45 am

The problem is that the need for a cure is defined from needs of people that has little clue on what's inside the mind of a person with autistic/asperger function. Yes, it's another way of function and not necessarily compatible with the majority population.

Of course some people certainly has problems but that doesn't mean everybody has that. And many organizations fail to accommodate this.

Being immune against relationship drama, status desires, keeping face, nonsense discussions etc and able to focus intensely on subject is quite nice. The reason communication is lacking may very well be that there's nothing the person with AS finds stimulating to communicate or that the person around them is interesting enough and many opinions on AS is formed by this because NT breathe using social interaction.



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18 Oct 2012, 5:58 am

Inuyasha wrote:
How can you cure something when it isn't a disease? In order to be "cured" you will lose part of what makes you who you are, your unique way of looking at things, I know you may feel alone a lot, but do you really want to lose part of yourself to have your personality and thought process irrevocably altered?

I wouldn't, and you shouldn't either.


it wouldnt actually be physcially possible to just rewire the trillions of conections that diferentiate NT's from spectrumites, at least not anytime soon.
even gene therapy cant actually work retroactively, sometimes they can aproximate such a function but still havent seen anything that tells me ti could be used for what is essentially brain surgery.

i also agree that even if it were possible most people wouldnt excactly because of the above.


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18 Oct 2012, 9:17 pm

Another thing to think about is that if an autistic person is being cured against their will, they could turn on the expert and become very uncooperative and rebellious. I know I would.


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Keyman
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18 Oct 2012, 9:43 pm

Or they turn and cure other people from NTism :twisted:



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20 Oct 2012, 3:04 am

I don't think a cure, a neurotype-change, in itself is wrong. However society would probably stop considering the different needs of those who don't want a 'cure' because it's their fault for refusing the 'cure'. In addition parents could force such a cure on their children and society may even force it on ASD people in general because it's less of a bother than being considerate.