Can people choose to be gay like they can choose ice cream f

Page 5 of 5 [ 77 posts ]  Go to page Previous  1, 2, 3, 4, 5

KT67
Veteran
Veteran

Joined: 6 May 2019
Gender: Female
Posts: 1,879

23 Sep 2020, 12:12 pm

No

People can choose to act on it or not.

But there's nothing wrong with gay sex inherently. So there's nothing inherently wrong with making that choice.

Obviously the same rules apply as any time you choose to have sex - make sure you get consent, make sure you're not cheating on a partner you promised to be monogamous with, use protection etc. But all that would be the same as if the partner was a different gender to you. It has nothing to do with being gay or it being gay sex.

Sexuality can fluctuate with time and you're still bi if it does that imo.



naturalplastic
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 26 Aug 2010
Age: 65
Gender: Male
Posts: 24,274
Location: temperate zone

23 Sep 2020, 12:47 pm

lostonearth35 wrote:
I've heard this question only about a million times on WP, and the question will always be the same: NO. You cannot choose your sexuality any more than you can choose ice cream flavors.

I can just see it now, DQ becoming LGBTQ, and you go there and they have flavors of sexuality. Do you want hetero, gay, bi or ace? Or maybe ace with with bi sprinkles! Hahaha :lol: I'm going crazy!!


Well... it IS called "Diary Queen".



BenReillyUK
Tufted Titmouse
Tufted Titmouse

User avatar

Joined: 11 Sep 2020
Gender: Male
Posts: 35
Location: UK

23 Sep 2020, 12:52 pm

No.
You like what you like.
A bi-sexual person can be monogamous though. See one thing is a choice but the sexuality thing.
Not
Up
To
You

That’s why child abusers are so dangerous. They can choose not to act but they can’t stop liking the wrong thing. Worrying.

But being gay or bi is lent harming anyone.



Wolfram87
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 14 Feb 2015
Age: 32
Gender: Male
Posts: 4,976
Location: Sweden

23 Sep 2020, 1:27 pm

lostonearth35 wrote:
You cannot choose your sexuality any more than you can choose ice cream flavors.



...Is there an Ice Cream Dictator that I don't know about?


_________________
I'm bored out of my skull, let's play a different game. Let's pay a visit down below and cast the world in flame.


vermontsavant
Veteran
Veteran

Joined: 7 Dec 2010
Gender: Male
Posts: 6,110
Location: Left WP forever

23 Sep 2020, 1:36 pm

Ice cream hadn't been invented when this thread was authored.

:mrgreen:


_________________
Forever gone
Sorry I ever joined
WrongPlanet is rancid,goodbye forever


Meistersinger
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 10 May 2012
Gender: Male
Posts: 3,700
Location: Beautiful(?) West Manchester Township PA

23 Sep 2020, 5:20 pm

Yes, it is a conscious choice, just like it was a conscious choice for me to be asexual and totally avoid sexual relationships, despite what the psychologists and psychiatrists say.



OutsideView
Toucan
Toucan

User avatar

Joined: 4 Oct 2017
Age: 36
Gender: Male
Posts: 274
Location: England ^not male but apparently you can't change it

24 Sep 2020, 3:19 pm

It's actually quite a good analogy. You can choose which ice cream flavour to eat but you can't choose which you like eating; you can choose which gender(s) to have a relationship and/or sex with but you can't choose which, if any, you'd actually enjoy doing it with.


_________________
Silence lies steadily against the wood and stone of Hill House. And we who walk here, walk alone.


emotrtkey
Velociraptor
Velociraptor

Joined: 12 Aug 2020
Gender: Male
Posts: 445

24 Sep 2020, 3:53 pm

Jitro wrote:
Can people choose between being gay or straight like they can choose between buying vanilla or chocolate ice cream?


Why do you think straight people can't be gay? What makes you think we're all unhappy?



Bradleigh
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 25 May 2008
Age: 30
Gender: Male
Posts: 6,120
Location: Brisbane, Australia

24 Sep 2020, 4:17 pm

There is a boysenberry joke in here somewhere.

Or something about bi people able to get two different flavours. Or that one meme where a kid ask why the other kid's mother lets him eat two hotdogs.


_________________
Through dream I travel, at lantern's call
To consume the flames of a kingdom's fall


apprentice
Emu Egg
Emu Egg

Joined: 1 Dec 2019
Age: 40
Gender: Male
Posts: 2

26 Sep 2020, 9:54 pm

I think that some bisexual people live in traditional (heterosexual) partnership because they were discarding their second part of sexuality due to general intolerance trends, especially being young. After some years, when married and have children, they may discover that they are not really happy with woman. There are many men like that active on LGBT dating apps, marked as “discrete”, “married” etc., however, searching explicitly for sex with males. Some of them are even describing themselves as passive (ie. taking anal) which is rather more common feature of gays than bi. It may look that being bisexual should be very flexible option for sex partner selection but it does not. I do not know how other bi people act, but in my case there are very specific and narrow ranges of criteria for considering a partner sexually attractive and it is valid for both genders. In other words, only small fraction of woman or man diversity is attractive to me and bring my attention. In case of women it overlaps with their preferences but in case of men it is much more difficult to match each other. Moreover, Asperger traits in contacts with women are not as critical as with men, which are much more selective.



Bradleigh
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 25 May 2008
Age: 30
Gender: Male
Posts: 6,120
Location: Brisbane, Australia

26 Sep 2020, 10:15 pm

apprentice wrote:
I think that some bisexual people live in traditional (heterosexual) partnership because they were discarding their second part of sexuality due to general intolerance trends, especially being young. After some years, when married and have children, they may discover that they are not really happy with woman. There are many men like that active on LGBT dating apps, marked as “discrete”, “married” etc., however, searching explicitly for sex with males. Some of them are even describing themselves as passive (ie. taking anal) which is rather more common feature of gays than bi. It may look that being bisexual should be very flexible option for sex partner selection but it does not. I do not know how other bi people act, but in my case there are very specific and narrow ranges of criteria for considering a partner sexually attractive and it is valid for both genders. In other words, only small fraction of woman or man diversity is attractive to me and bring my attention. In case of women it overlaps with their preferences but in case of men it is much more difficult to match each other. Moreover, Asperger traits in contacts with women are not as critical as with men, which are much more selective.


As someone who fairly recently recognised myself as bi, my taste in women has especially been on the masculine side, such as tomboys, having boyish traits like short hair. And I am pretty sure that I don't have the same type of attraction to breast like most straight men have, and flat girls could be fine with me, I had not understand why most straight guys got so attached to size. I feel like those were clues to my range of taste.


_________________
Through dream I travel, at lantern's call
To consume the flames of a kingdom's fall


kevinquin
Emu Egg
Emu Egg

User avatar

Joined: 1 Oct 2020
Age: 29
Gender: Male
Posts: 6
Location: USA

01 Oct 2020, 2:02 pm

Nope. That's true. Before choosing this title be sure you are gay indeed. Unless you are confident about that, you can't choose it this easily



Wish_Caster
Tufted Titmouse
Tufted Titmouse

Joined: 12 Oct 2020
Age: 2019
Gender: Female
Posts: 30
Location: Ohio

12 Oct 2020, 10:21 pm

We don’t choose who we’re attracted to gay or straight the only choice we make is whether to hide in shame all out lives or to live with pride