scale of -10 to +10, how do you feel right now?

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-10

This year has gone from bad to worse. I don’t want to continue without having a girlfriend in my life. This post will be ignored because others think my suffering doesn’t count.

Again not ignored by me, even if I really don’t know what to say that might be helpful.

Just being there helps me. My detractors don’t want anyone to be there for me.

Brother Marknis, you are once again NOT ignored by me.

-10

Just let me die.

-10

I feel more alone than ever and no one is letting me know if they still see me as a friend.

5 Trying to gently fight my way out of feeling disassociated.

I said so yesterday and a few others have said to today. I think your mind is distorting this to keep you from noticing how often people do express that they like you, care about you and hope good things happen for you.

-9.5 I really just want to call it quits on everything. I keep trying things, for plenty of time and with a fully open mind, and still just wasting time and money. I’m fed up with my therapist and really don’t want to have to find a new one, what’s kept me coming back to this one is that he specializes in neurological disorders, including ASDs (and many of his clients have some form of ASD), which I know can be pretty hard to find, and he’s known me for over a decade and knows my history and stuff, I just don’t have it in me to try to get comfortable with someone else. And all ECT is doing is hindering my thinking, I’ve been having a heck of a time putting my thoughts into words for the past few weeks, even more than usual. I may often end up with something decent, but it takes much more time, editing, and frustration when I just can’t come up with what I want. It seems to correlate with the ECT and when I should have been seeing results and stuff, is why I expect that’s what’s to blame. So I really just want to stop that, too. Didn’t help me the first time, either, I was just hoping it might make the difference between staying in the hospital and at least being able to stay at home.

-5. I'm growing frustrated, fed up and depressed.

No matter how hard I try to better my health and lifestyle, my body seems to be having other ideas.

I feel dejected, as if I'm constantly being shat on.

IMO, your mind has become so warped that it won't allow you anymore to tell the
difference between who is truly a friend and who truly is not.

I am one of many friends you have and always will be.

Also, I am sorry that you got blocked from using Wrong Planet for the next 30 days.

-7 Pretty depressed

I'm sorry you feel so depressed

I hope you feel better.

Thank you!

I hope you feel a little better today Butterfly!

I'm a 5

While it would be better for me if you were at a 10 since you deserve it given how selflessly you tire to support people on this forum while dealing with your own issues, I'm at least delighted that your 5 is an improvement from days ago where you felt worse. That's great!