unwanted encounters

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This kind of thing happened to me a few times. People, complete strangers, who don't respect my boundaries.


Example 1

When I was standing in line in a bookstore and minding my very own business, some boy came really, really close and just kept standing next to me (not behind me) for about a minute. He didn't say a single word and wasn't trying to buy anything. I was careful to not make any eye contact and still focus on minding my own business, thinking "go away, go away, stop it, go away". Eventually he did but I felt extremely uncomfortable.


Example 2

I was waiting for a movie screening. Some boy sat next to me and literally started to get closer and closer. He didn't say a word. Didn't try to make any conversation, didn't try to introduce himself or get to know me. He obviously felt it's all right to act as if there was some secret agreement between us (reminder: we were complete strangers).
I got up and walked away. I was purely disgusted and insulted.


They were both complete strangers. I've never seen them before.
Each time I felt annoyed. I felt like my personal space has been invaded. My safety has be threatened.

I don't think this is the appropriate behavior for approaching strangers - neurotypical, asperger, whatever.

Oh and it's ALWAYS men or boys. Somehow women respect my personal space and don't get "cosy" with me.

Why is this happening? How can I avoid this?

Unfortunately there is no way to completely avoid it without being a little rude. The best I can say is that you should tell them very calmly to stop. You can also try the "uhm, do I know you?"

They probably don't even realize that they're doing it. People from different cultures have different personal radii. I also think people from large cities, who are used to riding crowded trains, have a different idea of personal space.

This happens to me, too. I don't understand it. People who do not have different cultural backgrounds also do it. Sometimes I move away from the person.