Do you script what you are going to say?

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Do you script your words beforehand?
Poll ended at 16 Jan 2013, 10:00 pm
Yes, over the phone and in public 61%  61%  [ 41 ]
Yes, in public 3%  3%  [ 2 ]
Yes, over the phone 7%  7%  [ 5 ]
No 6%  6%  [ 4 ]
Sometimes 22%  22%  [ 15 ]
Total votes : 67

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Snowy Owl
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11 Jan 2013, 10:00 pm

I find myself doing this all the time when I'm in public. If I'm going to a restaurant or anywhere else where I have no choice but to interact with strangers and I have an idea of the types of things I will have to say, I plan my out my words beforehand to avoid awkward situations. I do this also when speaking on the phone.



charlottez
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11 Jan 2013, 10:24 pm

Not always far in advance. Sometimes I become hyper-aware of what I am supposed to say or do, and think in the moment, "This is the part where I ..." and then follow through with it. I remember distinctly doing this when I was around 18, and kept encountering people for the first time and them saying, "Nice to meet you." I always thought that was odd, as they had just learned my name and we'd had no discussion yet. This kept happening, and it occurred to me that this was social convention. So, I made a point of saying the same thing when I met someone new (even though I had no idea if it was in fact nice to meet them).

That was probably different from what you were talking about, but I also do rehearsals too. Especially if I am nervous about who I will be talking to. Job interviews, work parties, dates. In fact, I remember making a list of different aspects of my life and interests when preparing for date. Of course, none of it came back to me in the moment. But I kept the list as a memento.



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11 Jan 2013, 10:46 pm

charlottez, this is precisely what I am talking about, thank you for the feedback.



Sylvastor
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11 Jan 2013, 10:53 pm

Yes, I do this, but I do this in my mind. I think that is one of the many reasons why I prefer to use non-verbal media to express myself, like this forum, instead of talking to people in person.


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11 Jan 2013, 10:58 pm

I am the same way, and I often have to do this somewhat spontaneously. I wanted to ask because often when I explain to people that I do this (I am constantly surrounded by NT's and my parents, after 19 years seem to be just now noticing my odd and peculiar habits) they look at me as if I am insane. So I wanted to see if I am the only one.



FishStickNick
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11 Jan 2013, 11:29 pm

Sylvastor wrote:
Yes, I do this, but I do this in my mind. I think that is one of the many reasons why I prefer to use non-verbal media to express myself, like this forum, instead of talking to people in person.

Same here. It gives me a chance to contemplate my response. I avoid phone calls at work to avoid awkward situations where I don't quite know how to respond or end up making no sense.



corastorm
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11 Jan 2013, 11:36 pm

I do this constantly. It is like a never-ending dialogue in my head, trying to work out the different ways conversations might go and repeat responses over and over to myself. I hate it but I don't know what else to do because I can't speak fast enough to have a conversation otherwise.

I had been doing it so long I didn't know there was anything different about it. When I started seeing a therapist it became a full time job to prepare for the sessions, that's when I figured out that everyone doesn't do this. But I still can't stop.



Verdandi
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11 Jan 2013, 11:42 pm

I script most of what I say. Much of what I write here is so I can explain things to my therapist and other professionals I have to deal with.



mackico
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11 Jan 2013, 11:53 pm

If I have to ring someone on the phone, then yes I do. Mind, this is only if I am calling an eating establishment to order food. I just don't use the phone at all for other purposes. If people want to chat over the phone I have difficulty, because chit-chat is difficult to script.

I also do in public, say at a restaurant before I can order, or the train before I can buy my ticket, I carefully plan out exactly what I'm going to say.

I also do this if I have something important to tell someone.



rapidroy
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12 Jan 2013, 12:21 am

I make mental notes before calling anyone, think about what to say before engageing anyone.

If I am about to start/engage what can likely become an argument/debate I take a moment and make a mental bullet point list of points I want to make, script an opening sentance and put together a list of counter arguments for the other party and script my reaction accordingly. People often compliment my debate skills.

If I script to the word I mess up alot and lose my place however mental bullet points and free speech tends to produce the best outcome for me.



unsortable
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12 Jan 2013, 12:24 am

Yes, I prepare what I'm going to say, especially to strangers. Which means most people. If I don't, the first thing out of my mouth is pure gibberish. It took awhile for me to become good at this, actually. I remember a lot of times in school raising my hand and knowing the right answer non-verbally, but when the teacher pointed at me my answer was half nonsense, because I hadn't verbalised it in my head. Earned me some odd stares, that.

If a conversation goes to fast or takes an unexpected turn, I often have to pause mid-sentence to process my thoughts into words, before being able to continue. When that happens, I swear I can feel the gears turning in my head.



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12 Jan 2013, 12:26 am

Both. Mostly over the phone, but also for face to face conversations that I'm nervous about or where I need to get across important points, especially if it's an emotional issue or I need to be persuasive. But it's not a word for word kind of scripting, more a way of getting my thoughts in order.


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12 Jan 2013, 2:47 am

Well how else am I meant to get words out? Without scripting, it just doesn't happen.


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12 Jan 2013, 2:58 am

I at first said no, but sometimes. Mostly on the phone tho its a bit complicated request phrasing then I might occationally script. But I mostly dont. I dont ever for social situations cause if something is so scripted, i'll trip out and my brain will freeze even more, lacking the flow in social interaction.



Minty33
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12 Jan 2013, 3:33 am

Everything I do. Meeting up with someone close to me, going to a shop, calling on the phone, going out into the shared kitchen when people are in there. I've been in situations where I haven't planned (being called by a company, people just turning up) and it just doesn't work, and in those cases I need the other person to be the more dominant force. My dialogue with the 2 close friends I have made at Uni basically consist of my asking question after question. I have too plan some of these in advance.

I don't understand why they don't throw me a bone though. They can ask me something - I wont give the best response, but it's better than me grinding out questions. 1 of these 2 people will talk at great length which is nice, allows me to think ahead. The other one doesn't..A lot of silence in those conversations (plus she will constantly be on the phone, which is very rude in my opinion)

But yes, I always script.
Infact, the hardest thing for me is presentations. I would love to read of a piece of paper, I have tried, and I crash and burn when I don't. My thoughts aren't clear other wise..Anyone feel the same?



RaNg84
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12 Jan 2013, 3:42 am

If I need or want to do something that might be hard to ask, then yes i will script, to make sure that I say the right things. Heck even NTs script what they want to say.