White House rules out building Star Wars' Death Star

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Tequila
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13 Jan 2013, 9:07 am

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"The Administration does not support blowing up planets": White House rules out building Death Star battlestation
  • Sunday People: Officials released a firmly tongue-in-cheek statement after Star Wars fanatics compiled a petition calling for construction to start by 2016
The White House has officially ruled out building an intergalactic Death Star - because it doesn’t favour “blowing up planets”.

Officials released a firmly tongue-in-cheek statement after Star Wars fanatics compiled a petition calling for construction to start by 2016.

The pro Death Star lobby claim the project would create jobs and boost America’s national defence capabilities.

Never mind. I'm sure the Indians and/or the Chinese are looking into creating Death Star right this very moment...



CSBurks
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13 Jan 2013, 9:24 am

The cost of such a project would be astronomical (pun intended).

And I question if there is even enough metal on the earth produce a space station the size of a "small moon."



Raptor
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13 Jan 2013, 9:29 am

I think we should have one.
The bigger and more sinister the better.


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GGPViper
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13 Jan 2013, 9:40 am

I think we should look at this from a military point of view... A Death Star would clearly act as a potent force multiplier with the ability to project strategic area denial beyond our current capabilities. We should act quickly to secure first strike capability and get inside the enemy's OODA loop.

In other words:

Mister President, We Must Not Allow A Death Star Gap!



TallyMan
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13 Jan 2013, 9:47 am

The government spokesman C3PO said "These are not the death stars we are looking for."


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CSBurks
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13 Jan 2013, 9:51 am

Maybe a Mini Death Star?



AgentPalpatine
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13 Jan 2013, 3:29 pm

:Humor:

This is what Supplemental Appropriations bills were designed for. Once the Imperial Senate, errrrr.....Congress passes a funding bill, Moff Tarkin, errrr.....NASA can begin work on a mobile asteroid mining base.

I support raising revenue by imposing an excise on each mention of "Jar Jar Brinks". I'm not sure how CBO and/or JCT will score that bill.


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ooOoOoOAnaOoOoOoo
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13 Jan 2013, 3:36 pm

That's funny! It has been first and foremost on my mind for quite some time...



Jacoby
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13 Jan 2013, 3:43 pm

we need Death Star control, what if private citizens built one? WRITE UP THE LEGISLATION



Fnord
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13 Jan 2013, 5:58 pm

CSBurks wrote:
The cost of such a project would be astronomical ...

Image


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Magneto
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14 Jan 2013, 7:03 am

Building the hull wouldn't actually be that difficult. A 10-20m thick sphere of asteroidal iron, with quite a good diameter, could be made by hollowing out a small iron asteroid, placing ice in it's centre, and focusing enough solar energy on it to melt the iron and cause it to balloon to the required size due to the steam pressure inside it.

Of course, if you have the solar array necessary, you could also focus the energy on enemy cities, or maybe even vaporise individual buildings if your focusing is good enough...

Which leads to the obvious conclusion that to create a death star, you must first create a death star...



visagrunt
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14 Jan 2013, 1:42 pm

Tequila wrote:
Never mind. I'm sure the Indians and/or the Chinese are looking into creating Death Star right this very moment...


If there are Death Star (tm) plans out there, I am reasonably certain that the Chinese won't care how many Bothans they have to kill to get their hands on a set.


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iamnotaparakeet
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15 Jan 2013, 1:46 pm

Why not just build a few power plants and laser arrays upon the Moon? Why bother with the wattage necessary to destroy a planet when you can use pinpoint strikes to assist ground combat?



Magneto
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15 Jan 2013, 5:58 pm

Why put it on the moon? It's a bit far away. Better to put it in a lower orbit. True, it costs more to resupply from the lunar colony, but targeting is a lot easier...



AgentPalpatine
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15 Jan 2013, 6:07 pm

:humor:

The Florida delegation was holding out for the moon. That was the only way to get the money. Do you know how hard it is to get space funding when the senate is run by interior states?


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