It seems to me Aspie women have an easier time then men in

Post Reply New Topic

It seems to me Aspie women have an easier time then Aspie men in finding love and getting laid.

I think that it depends on the individual.

Generally your right, because the man has to do all the courting. Women are treated in society like sex objects, as degrading as this might be it seems to put them on a pedistal too. Men are to a far smaller degree made into sex objects, but it's alot more rare.... A man has to obtain a woman, a woman only needs to find a man.

If I were a guy, there is no way in hell I'd be married, unless I kidnapped a woman and held her hostage.

It is true that males, Aspie or not, find it more difficult to get dates than women. I think it is largely due to what men look for in comparison to women though, and how each sex selects their partner. If we all selected in the same way, I reckon each sex would have similar chances of finding a date.

Men are (traditionally) the ones expected to do most of the foot-work in regards to initiating a relationship. That alone isn't an issue only experienced by AS males, as has already been said. As such, it is often up to the woman to either accept or reject the man. This gives the impression that the woman, or rather women on the whole, have more power.

This assumption seems reasonable.... at first. It works well with a further assumption (which is implicit) that all women will have such a decision-making opportunity occur. There is no guarantee to this. Discussions of people going for mates that aren't out of their league can arise, again suggesting everyone has a fair shot.

The lower on the totem pole of social "acceptance" you go, the harder it will be for a guy to be comfortable with approaching a female in the first place. Society is great about making the popular people feel like they can do anything if they put their minds to it, and the unpopular ones (popularity being used in a somewhat broader sense than normal) that they can't necessarily do anything they want. Right off the bat this will take away some guys from this "active" pool of males. This, in turn, will force an increase in women that don't get approached. (Simple math, has to "balance.")

Furthermore ( Sweeping Generalization Alert ) many guys start their "hunting," "searching," whatever you want to call it, by judging physical appearance. If a woman is considered (by society, isn't society grand?) less attractive, she will be considered less "dateable" by a good number of the male populace. Again, the whole league thing comes up, but I'm not entirely swayed by that argument.

The end result is that, if you look at things as a whole, rather than in individual pieces, both parties make choices about who is and isn't "worthy." The "work" a guy may have to do differs from that of a girl, but that isn't to say that the difficulty is unequal.

Some might say that this traditional approach to dating no longer necessarily applies, but if you consider other approaches, such as a reversed-role approach, you can simply flip the genders in the above and it still applies. You can tell me that women are "more likely" to initially judge a guy based upon more than looks, if you like, and I can start listing incidents where I have seen the exact opposite. More than that, you can't initially judge someone's personality. The first input you have is how they appear.

(This is not including indirect meeting, such as t3h interweb, that puts an entirely different spin on things, and I haven't really addressed that here.)

I think you guys are all overlooking the biggest statistic of them all:


There are significantly more Aspie men than there are Aspie women.

With stats like that, logically its almost a sin if an Aspie women can't find someone who can A) relate to their problems and B) understand their mind/find them awesome

is seems jonathandoors is an idiot.

Quit the assumptions, man.

Men seem to have ridiculously high standards, also "love" is very hard to find no matter who you are.

Hark! My search for the elusive ad hominem has been met with great success!

We don't call names, here at WrongPlanet.