Funny misheard things

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One of my personal favorite mondegreens. What has been heard, cannot be un-heard.

http://wetdreamtomato.ytmnd.com/

My aunt sings "There's a bad moon on the rise," "There's a bathroom on the right."

She knows the right words. She just thinks its funny.

I'm sure people hear all sorts of amusing things come out of my mouth. Between the colloquialisms and the caricature-sthick Ozark-Appalachian accent, it's a wonder anyone ever understands anything I say correctly.

Years ago when I was in a band (I played guitar & bass), our singer used to do that "bathroom on the right" line once in a while (especially if there really WAS a restroom on the right side of the place where we were playing)!

He knew the right words too, but he'd sing that instead sometimes to see how many people in the audience were really paying attention. Sometimes he would get a good laugh from the audience, and other times nobody seemed to notice.

From the manager where I volunteer: "...chocolate chip cookies from Klingon."

I don't know what she actually said.

A girl in my boarding house said "I don't like mushrooms" and I thought she said "I don't like Russians"... Oops

We gave my son some whiffle balls for Christmas and he was playing with one and all of a sudden he got mad and threw it against the wall. I said, What's the matter?"

He said, "That whistle ball is broken! I blew and blew but it doesn't whistle!"

On an ad that was for a rich-people estate and definitely had nothing to do with Star Trek:
"... the best Borg games..."

"I'm a chick, and love it!"?

I dunno. Thats my only guess.

A line from The Sound of Music: "We've hidden the car in the woods.".

What I heard: "We've hidden Picard in the woods.".

A friend I play Magic: The Gathering with told me to "grab his deck," but having hearing loss, I heard "grab my d*ck."

So, what did you do?

What I heard: Thin Cursed Pizza

Actual Phrase: Thin Crust Pizza

When I listen to the song One Week by the Barenaked Ladies, I kept racking my brain over the first line of the second verse. I thought it was something that would make more sense, like "ticket to China, the Chinese chicken". I found out later that it was actually the more gibberish-sounding "chickity China, the Chinese chicken". When I found that out, my first thought was "what the **** is a chickity?"

Plante Moran, a company, when looked at quickly, looks like Planet Moron.

When my aunt was young (she was old enough to read, though), she saw a sign that said "Union Plaza" and, without thinking, said "Look, Onion Pizza!"