Do you think it's harder to be LGBT or have ASD?

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Would you rather be...
LGBT 45%  45%  [ 29 ]
On the spectrum 55%  55%  [ 35 ]
Total votes : 64

Ettina
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10 Apr 2013, 8:34 pm

I think it depends on what kind of LGTB you are.

Transsexual? Hands down harder than AS. At least AS doesn't make you feel like you have a horrible growth between your legs (or two on your chest). From what I've heard from trans people, it really sucks to be trans. Being trans can make you miserable, even if you get the best support possible. Sure, transitioning fixes all that, but I wouldn't want to go through that kind of distress even if it was temporary.

Gay, Lesbian or Bi? Probably easier than AS, because it's easier to hide if you're in an unsafe situation. But on the other hand, a lot more people condone violence against LGB people as opposed to autistic people.

Asexual? Definitely way easier. Most virulent homophobes have no clue asexuality exists, and some might even like us better than heterosexuals. And the stuff asexuality interferes with, it also tends to make you want less. Only thing I don't like about being asexual is that it'll be a lot trickier for me to have a child.



cemil
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31 Jan 2019, 3:49 am

idk ..



MC1729
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11 Feb 2019, 10:51 pm

I am transsexual and I can tell you (at least for me) it is WAY more painful to suffer from gender dysphoria, even in an environment that is accepting of transsexual people. (I use "transsexual" because it is more medical and "transgender" has been politicized and has a vague definition, but that's a completely different subject.) Gender dysphoria makes me hate myself and I wish every day that I was born biologically male. Knowing that will never happen even as I transition is really disappointing for me. Being autistic, however, gives me (mild) disabilities and some abilities, so it's something I can work with. Being transsexual has no benefits.


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04 May 2020, 4:49 am

Me personally in my own objective opinion, I have to say that it's much harder to be on the spectrum.

Reason why I say that, is that comes first.

Yes I'm gay, but it's not everything, as sexuality, it's only half of me really.

Being autistic however, I feel plays a bigger role, and it's more complex. Also, the LGBT community can be judgmental towards those that are different, have disabilities, and are on the spectrum. So therefore, I have to say it's much harder being autistic, than it is being LGBT.



goldfish21
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04 May 2020, 6:53 am

It’s been 7 years since I posted in this thread.

Answer hasn’t changed. It’s way harder to be AS than gay. It just affects Way more of life than sexual orientation does, and for the most part in negative vs positive ways.


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Lost_dragon
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04 May 2020, 6:51 pm

Hmm, well being gay hasn't always been all sunshine and rainbows for me. With a traumatic physical attack and persistent homophobia that has occurred in my life. Despite this, I would imagine that ASD would be harder.

Being trans must be fairly rough though. Earlier in the year I went with my friends to a nightclub. Some of my friends are trans. We ran into trouble with some bouncers. They were guarding the toilets and stopped my friends from going into the men's toilets. Both are trans men.

So we got into an argument about the gender of my friends. One of them told us it was OK and that he was used to it. That he'd just use the ladies'. However, the other was shaken by the experience and decided to leave the club early.

Unfortunately, when someone appears androgynous enough they can get judged either way. In situations where my friend isn't allowed in the men's, he might also get judged for being in the women's toilets. Sometimes he passes as cis. I would say that his appearance tends to give the impression of a young feminine guy or a masculine woman to others. A few people stare, seemingly trying to figure out which. People might even assume that we're hooking up in the toilets if we go in together if they read him as male. Yet he's not allowed in the men's sometimes so it's a lose-lose situation.

We went to get food afterwards and a couple of guys we didn't know came up and asked us why my friend had a male name, so he explained about being trans. They kept calling him she which was rather annoying. I'd understand if it was a few times, but it was near constant.

Then they started bothering me, calling me a toff. We were hanging out with a girl with a posh accent that differed from mine. So they joked "Heh, we've got two toffs here, perfect match innit", which I awkwardly politely laughed at. They were off the mark though. My other friend and the girl are unofficially a couple. If anything I was the third wheel in this situation. Although I'll admit to briefly considering asking if I could kiss her when I was a bit drunk, but I didn't. She's cute, kind and unpredictable. I can understand why he likes her.

Some of my friends have been on the waiting list to start hormones for 2-4 years.


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AprilR
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11 May 2020, 2:12 pm

Where i live both groups are ostracized. So i will probably take the fact that i am bi as well as autistic to the grave. I think it's equally horrible in eastern countries.



Domenico.11.07
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10 Aug 2020, 5:54 pm

I think it’s hard either way. But I also think that it can also depend on the people around you and their ability (or nonexistent ability) to accept you for who you are and understand what you’re dealing with. Most people, for me at least, don’t automatically assume that I am an Aspie... but if I do end up saying something, they usually don’t believe me and compare me to a stereotypical image of somebody with Autism. But if I tell them that I identify as LGBT, then they usually believe me and (most of the time) understand. But this is my situation. It’s definitely different for everyone. :-D



FleaOfTheChill
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10 Aug 2020, 6:18 pm

Autism is more difficult for me than being non binary and bi/pan. it took me a lot of years to find a way to comfortably live in my own skin while dealing with things like sensory issues, selective mutism, shutdowns and meltdowns, and the list goes on and on. And I'm no way near a master of keeping my stuff in check. I'm just better about it now. My gender (or lack there of) and sexuality are way less problematic to me in day to day life.



MushroomTacos
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14 Aug 2020, 7:48 pm

Being LGBT.
As a trans woman, I find myself in a lot of horrifying situations. I face discrimination often, people look at me with what i can only describe as "I'd kill you right here on the spot if I could get away with it" expressions on their face.
Not to say being autistic is a walk in the park, but at least it doesnt make me fear for my life.



AnonymousAnonymous
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06 Sep 2020, 9:41 pm

I'm straight, but if I was gay or bi, I think my mom would give me a hard time about it.

She takes pride (no pun intended) in being a raging LGBT-phobe.


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