Right Down the Old Conundrum...

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aspiesandra27
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28 Feb 2013, 4:02 pm

Crikey, how does this go from the poor bloke wanting to contact a girl he had a sympathy for, to waking up stabbed in hospital?

FFS, lighten up girl.



Zokk
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28 Feb 2013, 5:45 pm

aspiesandra27 wrote:
Crikey, how does this go from the poor bloke wanting to contact a girl he had a sympathy for, to waking up stabbed in hospital?

I'm kinda wondering that, myself. Because, contrary to popular belief, not everyone you meet is a psycho criminal waiting for a chance to rape, torture and and murder you.


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aspiesandra27
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28 Feb 2013, 5:47 pm

Zokk wrote:
aspiesandra27 wrote:
Crikey, how does this go from the poor bloke wanting to contact a girl he had a sympathy for, to waking up stabbed in hospital?

I'm kinda wondering that, myself. Because, contrary to popular belief, not everyone you meet is a psycho criminal waiting for a chance to rape, torture and and murder you.


Absolutely, Zokk.

Don't let it get you down. :wink:



spongy
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01 Mar 2013, 1:10 am

As a rule of thumb I try to have a decent excuse/explanation whenever Im contacting a girl out of the blue.

My excuses can be as lame as Im sorry but finding your email address on x website is way too easy(in a joking tone).
Last night for example I sent a first message to an acquaintance, in less than 10 minutes I had a reply and she asked if I was going out tonight. As soon as I arrived to where she was she asked me why didnt I send her a sms on tuesday(we were meeting some people and every bar was full so we had to improvise and she arrived late) and she gave me her number as soon as she found out I didnt have it.


If I cant think of a good excuse for contacting a girl out of the blue I sleep on things and if after a while of sleeping on it Im stuck at the same situation I try to find someone thatd be easier to message and wait until she messages me first/explicitly asks me to message her.


Is there any good explanation for waiting 8 years to ask someone out?
Im sorry but if there is its not crossing my mind right now and even if she was into you at the time making someone wait 8 years can make quite a lot of people give up hope and move on(refusing to date the other person in the future to avoid further similar situations)



Zokk
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01 Mar 2013, 1:39 am

spongy wrote:
Is there any good explanation for waiting 8 years to ask someone out?
Im sorry but if there is its not crossing my mind right now and even if she was into you at the time making someone wait 8 years can make quite a lot of people give up hope and move on(refusing to date the other person in the future to avoid further similar situations)

All I have is my own social anxiety and incompetence to blame for that. For a long time now, I've wished I'd been confident enough hang out with her and talk, and ask her out eventually, but by the time I felt like my confidence was high enough, we'd already drifted apart for various reasons- scheduling being the biggest one.

Interestingly enough, she just posted on Facebook today that she's getting bored and frustrated enough with not having a boyfriend (or just a guy friend to hang out with) that she's considering online dating. I didn't solicit myself, but I did comment on that post that if she ever wanted to talk or catch up or anything, I'm up for it. She also went on to post in another comment under that same post that she's looking for someone who's obviously intelligent, content with themselves and makes her feel comfortable around them, and who likes dogs (she has 2). And someone she's attracted to, for once.

I'm pretty sure I qualify for all of those points: People tell me I'm smart (often scary-smart), that I'm friendly, easy to get along with, and entertaining to talk to. On top of that, by my own admission, I'm also a major dog-person. But I can only guess that she was attracted to me at one point in the past, though, judging by her behavior back then.

Maybe I do have a chance, after all, if I play my cards right...


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spongy
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01 Mar 2013, 1:49 am

Zokk wrote:
spongy wrote:
Is there any good explanation for waiting 8 years to ask someone out?
Im sorry but if there is its not crossing my mind right now and even if she was into you at the time making someone wait 8 years can make quite a lot of people give up hope and move on(refusing to date the other person in the future to avoid further similar situations)

All I have is my own social anxiety and incompetence to blame for that. For a long time now, I've wished I'd been confident enough hang out with her and talk, and ask her out eventually, but by the time I felt like my confidence was high enough, we'd already drifted apart for various reasons- scheduling being the biggest one.

Interestingly enough, she just posted on Facebook today that she's getting bored and frustrated enough with not having a boyfriend (or just a guy friend to hang out with) that she's considering online dating. I didn't solicit myself, but I did comment on that post that if she ever wanted to talk or catch up or anything, I'm up for it. She also went on to post in another comment under that same post that she's looking for someone who's obviously intelligent, content with themselves and makes her feel comfortable around them, and who likes dogs (she has 2). And someone she's attracted to, for once.

I'm pretty sure I qualify for all of those points: People tell me I'm smart (often scary-smart), that I'm friendly, easy to get along with, and entertaining to talk to. On top of that, by my own admission, I'm also a major dog-person. But I can only guess that she was attracted to me at one point in the past, though, judging by her behavior back then.

Maybe I do have a chance, after all, if I play my cards right...


Well it looks like you just offered to catch up with her and hang out if she was up for it.

Id say that sounds better than a message about a situation she has forgotten and I hope she picks you up on that offer



Shau
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01 Mar 2013, 2:14 am

Hey Zokk wasn't your life in shambles a while ago? I'd suggest having a stable job or some kind of future academic prospects or something first before you even worry about girls.



Zokk
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01 Mar 2013, 2:32 am

Shau wrote:
Hey Zokk wasn't your life in shambles a while ago? I'd suggest having a stable job or some kind of future academic prospects or something first before you even worry about girls.

I've decided to try a change-up, now that I'm on proper meds and gotten myself accepted into an internship at a computer repair and refurbishing place here in town. I was pretty depressed a while back, and was frustrated with having no luck finding a job and not feeling ready to go back to college, either. Now, I've got something interesting and useful to learn and take up a lot of my spare time (and a good in-road to a good job) a new bike that'll make it a lot easier ti commute around town, and I'm so much of depressed, snarky as*hole to the people in my life.


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