Hey Im 15 and who feels the same way?

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Excuse my disabled mind, but I can assure you that my heart and soul is not
related to it. There is no doubt that my disabilities caused me to be single all my life. My heart is fully capable of a relationship. However my mind sets a huge boundary between something so special and vital to mental health. There is always a chance for me to succeed in achieving such a special emotion.

My mind is disabled but also creative and inspiring. Although others pick up flirting and there sexuality skills naturally, I have to be taught those skills by somebody else. However, my mind is capable of writing and inspiring others. This helps me get my opinions to spread to others.

My heart is capable of a relationship regardless of what my mind is like. However, I have been single all my life. Therefore heart brakes and rejection is all I had for fifteen years. Despite all of that, I have a heart that shines everyday with purity since it has never been taken before. My heart is just hidden in my mind somewhere waiting for the right one to see through my disabilities

However, something has brought my mind and heart together over time. It could be psychological symbiosis. Since I have a different mind than everyone, I express my love differently to others. This causes me to be more caring and supportive to my crush. So basically I am more polite, kind, supportive, and concerned than the average person.

I guess it is debatable wether my mind gives an advantage or disadvantage to
such an emotion achieved naturally by the normal state of mind. Psychologically the
heart is just a figure of speech to express the emotion of love. However philosophically
creativity is also a product of the mind that says otherwise. So my heart can either be
my mind or in some way separated from each other. Either way I think and feel different.


The purpose of this writing is to see if anyone feels the same way. Is there anyone who feels like this?

I think the problem you are having from what I see is that you are allowing your heart and mind to be one, and not separate. For starters, the mind is a powerful tool, but it can also be your enemy at the same time. Your mind in it's current state seems to be thinking that others won't like you for who you are or that you should only expect heartbreak from others. It is obvious that sex isn't a concern to you at this time, so don't allow sex to be a concern. I am not the type of person that wants my emotions and thoughts to be the same, I found life to be too difficult when I believed that to be true.

Maybe try some yoga or meditation to keep your mind from racing around? It can help you establish the differences between thoughts and emotions because the two are very different things. You can also try practicing listening to the thoughts in your mind and just observe them rather than speak them out. The idea is to be yourself, and not what it is you currently identify yourself as being.

15 years of heartbreaks and rejection? You were going after women at 1?

Kid, you're only 15. I know you're just a teenager so it's natural for you to be melodramatic but really.......dial it back.

No guys at your age (regardless of disability) have any idea what they are doing really. You may be a little behind the curve of your age group but not really by all that much. The fact that you are aknowledging your deficit at only 15 puts you about ten years ahead of where I was at that age.

My advice........ I'm sure there are plenty of quite socially awkward kids in your school to make friends and potential girlfriends with. Seek them out. Hell, based on your post here you have the skills to make some pretty good esoteric poetry. Weird girls love that stuff.

Interesting post.

I think many of us feel similarly at times.

As aspiemike suggested, have a look into yoga/meditation and learning about the Chakras - the body's energy centres, as you may find that learning about them, reading about the differences of the heart/mind etc will be helpful, but then to also put that knowledge into meditative practice.. well, you might just find you're able to create a better balance between your heart and mind and the way you feel. I've experienced this myself, and having one or the other (or a different) energy centre being very overactive leads to imbalances, thoughts & feelings like you've described. I suppose you have to be open to the metaphysical realm of things to believe anything I'm saying here or bother to look it up and learn about it. If you are, ok, learn, if you're not, whatever suit yourself - it's not going to affect me any.

Annnnnd you're 15. I know that's 100% of your life to date and all of the experience you have to reference, and that being single for 100% of your life sounds awful.. but you're only 15 years old. There's a long life to live ahead of you and plenty of time for friends, relationships, significant others, sex etc. An extremely low number of 15 year olds have ever had a relationship, never mind one that will last and turn into a long term adult relationship. 15 years of age is not nearly old enough and experienced enough to write yourself off as single for life because you haven't had a relationship yet. As someone else stated, acknowledging you're going to have difficulties to overcome in this area at 15 is going to make it way way easier for you to figure out what you need to do and do it in order to have the life you want than it has been for many others before you. Hell, I wasn't even aware of my own AS until ~6months ago at 30 years old. You've got plenty of time to figure things out, get yourself sorted out, try and fail and learn and try again.. just stop worrying about it so much and go with the flow a little more while you focus on learning how to paddle a little better.

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No for supporting trump. Because doing so is deplorable.

I'm 19 and I feel the exact same way, your love has sight and purpose that is very beautiful even though it may be cloudy and hard to see, but I can tell you are someone who has a lot of love to give back to the world and on the right day you'll find the person worth giving all that love and devotion and care to (also your mind isn't broken if you could write something as incredible as this then your mind works better than most others). A lot of people will tell you that your young and you have your youth to look forward to, and you know this isn't true, it's true for people who seize the day, but you don't do that you think about the day, and it's that thought that makes the love you posses truly a remarkable thing. I believe that with Human born there is a counterpart, there is someone out there like you who will fully understand and listen to it could be a true love, or just an incredible best friend but the point is someone out there exists just for you and you exist just for them. I know you have the soul, the dedication, and the love to truly make the world and the lives other something remarkable, something that only you can give back.