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HarrisDE
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13 Mar 2013, 5:35 pm

I had an escalated conversation with my boss, today, after she berated me for "disobeying direct orders" to use Comet, which I told her was highly irritating to my lungs and skin. She took this to be evidence that I "misrepresented" myself when I applied for the job.

The result of the meeting was that I have issues with trust, which I voiced was because of over 2 decades of bullying. I was told that my psychological problems are my own, and that I am already being heavily accommodated. The only accommodation I've received was someone taking over my tertiary tasks while I was having a panic attack because of an issue I had warned my boss of in advance.

I feel cheated and foolish.

The entire time of this meeting, I was tense as could be. My boss's superior kept touching my knee. And I was told repeatedly that my behavior is in the way of the function of business, despite the fact that I make business run better, when I am not forced last minute into an avoidable situation. I was just locked up. Now, it's rather too late. I know I'm perceived as a trouble-maker, as my boss commonly expresses behind my back, and sometimes while I am in the room.

I have applied for other jobs, which are all in the works. But I don't know what to do to save face!

Please, help.

-J



cathylynn
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13 Mar 2013, 5:51 pm

don't worry about saving face. "it's none of my business what other people think of me." - learned in a 12-step meeting.

you have done the best thing you can, which is apply for another job.



BlueMax
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13 Mar 2013, 6:13 pm

What job do you have that Comet cleanser is even required??



eric76
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13 Mar 2013, 9:38 pm

Image

I'd recognize that style anywhere even if I don't remember the specific drawing.

I haven't seen a Mad Magazine in years. (It probably doesn't help that I've only been in a book and magazine store about three times in the last ten or twelve years.)



eric76
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13 Mar 2013, 9:39 pm

By the way, I find Comet particularly irritating as well. I don't like to use it without rubber gloves.



BlueMax
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13 Mar 2013, 11:15 pm

eric76 wrote:
Image

I'd recognize that style anywhere even if I don't remember the specific drawing.

I haven't seen a Mad Magazine in years. (It probably doesn't help that I've only been in a book and magazine store about three times in the last ten or twelve years.)


Image :D

And now we should all sing a rousing chorus of, "Comet - it makes your tongue turn green! Comet - it tastes like gasoline!"



HarrisDE
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19 Mar 2013, 1:33 pm

I brought up the issue with my psychologist this Monday past.

She equated my boss's screaming at me to a 2-year-old throwing a tantrum. It's fairly apt, as she's set off by stressful situations, then fixates on some "justification" for her outburst.

This has created an awesome mental image for me, my boss as an Adult Baby, screaming on the floor of our kitchen in incoherent tantrum babble.

I also got my diagnosis, at long last!



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19 Mar 2013, 9:28 pm

HarrisDE wrote:
I had an escalated conversation with my boss, today, after she berated me for "disobeying direct orders" to use Comet, which I told her was highly irritating to my lungs and skin. She took this to be evidence that I "misrepresented" myself when I applied for the job.

The result of the meeting was that I have issues with trust, which I voiced was because of over 2 decades of bullying. I was told that my psychological problems are my own, and that I am already being heavily accommodated. The only accommodation I've received was someone taking over my tertiary tasks while I was having a panic attack because of an issue I had warned my boss of in advance.

I feel cheated and foolish.

The entire time of this meeting, I was tense as could be. My boss's superior kept touching my knee. And I was told repeatedly that my behavior is in the way of the function of business, despite the fact that I make business run better, when I am not forced last minute into an avoidable situation. I was just locked up. Now, it's rather too late. I know I'm perceived as a trouble-maker, as my boss commonly expresses behind my back, and sometimes while I am in the room.

I have applied for other jobs, which are all in the works. But I don't know what to do to save face!

Please, help.

-J


Get the f**k out of that job. She is a complete f**ktard.
Touching your knee can be viewed as sexual harrasment. Lawyer.

HarrisDE wrote:
She equated my boss's screaming at me to a 2-year-old throwing a tantrum. It's fairly apt, as she's set off by stressful situations, then fixates on some "justification" for her outburst.


Probably narcissistic personality or ASPD. Get out fast.


There are LOTS and LOTS of managers who are bosses just because someone gave them the job, it does not mean that they are qualified to lead people. Big difference in being a manager and a leader that inspire people to follow.


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"It is far better to grasp the Universe as it really is than to persist in delusion, however satisfying and reassuring" (Carl Sagan)


HarrisDE
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21 Mar 2013, 2:23 pm

So today, I listened to NPR's TED Radio Hour: "The Unquiet Mind." It was quite enlightening!

Jon Ronson, author of "The Psychopath Test," talked about some of the symptoms of a psychopath.

For s**ts and giggles, I googled this checklist Ronson speaks of. I have recognized in my manager 15 of the 20 on this checklist, only because I know nothing of her childhood/adolescence.

This puts things in perspective. And you were right on, @Ichinin!

She has backed off since I reported her to her superior. Her apologies in the meeting with this superior were completely unconvincing, with a grin on her face and patronizing tone in her voice. But she recognized that I will not hesitate to report anything that makes me feel a victim. She has a lot more to lose as the manager than do I as the custodian.

Also, I have an interview tomorrow for a new position, which is a great sign! Though I have no real issue with interviews, but I know the interviewer, and we have good rapport already, so I feel GREAT about this!

Thank you, guys, for listening. It's nice to feel like part of a community.



Ichinin
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21 Mar 2013, 2:55 pm

HarrisDE wrote:
Also, I have an interview tomorrow for a new position, which is a great sign! Though I have no real issue with interviews, but I know the interviewer, and we have good rapport already, so I feel GREAT about this!

Thank you, guys, for listening. It's nice to feel like part of a community.


Cool! I wish you good luck.


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