Your thoughts on growing out of Aspergers

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richardbenson
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17 Mar 2013, 12:40 am

So, I think I have grown out of my aspergers. I have minimal issues with it now, I've been so rusty at this game of socializing that I'm shure itte be a disaster but I'm going to try anyways. I know when I went through "recovery" for my Alcoholism I had people mostley online tell me I would always be an alcoholic. I simply didn't believe this, I have been free from this for awile now and I know I will never come back. This is why I don't think rehab works at all, because people are told they have a disease so they feel helpless in dealing with it. thus relapse, If however you are told you can overcome your addiction without it ever being a problem again some people do well with being recoverd. Anyways, not to compare Autism spectrum disorders and Addiction here just trying to give an example of what I'm trying to get at.

Do you think its possible to not be Autistic any longer? A developmental problem to me would seem like If it was fixed with hardly any issues (A few minor ones) wouldn't be a develoupmental disability any longer and possibly a turn around in your develoupmental portfolio?


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Radiofixr
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17 Mar 2013, 11:36 am

Maybe but its more likely developing coping skills which mask it-I was never good at it and I wont change myself to please others or put on an act anymore-it was getting exhausting-it may have been possible for me to hide it and mask it but as time goes on and things pile up on me I just lose the control and it just comes out as to my true self. I also know a person I used to work with that was an alcoholic and was without drinking alcohol for 20 some years and all of a sudden something happened and now I get frustrated talking to him because he got into alcohol again and he said he beat it too-not to say all people fall back into it and it is great you do not drink anymore-just something happened to him and triggered it-and I have no idea to this day what may have happened.


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17 Mar 2013, 11:41 am

I would think that some Aspies could create adaptations and gain experence that would allow them to process social and non-verbal communication. Considering how many of the issues around AS are social and status-based, a great deal depends on context as well.


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richardbenson
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17 Mar 2013, 2:48 pm

Radiofixer you are probably right. Coping skills, the answer to lifes simple questions. The problem is the social structor Vs. Ones cognative abilities. Increase ones overall mental healths and watch life get better. While I don't think you can get rid of severe Differences such as Autism, Schizophrenia and Manic Depression you can combat it like a ninja with Coping skills. And the messed up thing is nobody can make you see any of this. You have to Expieriance it for yourself


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Dizzee
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17 Mar 2013, 2:56 pm

I think It's possible, but it might be too hard for some of us, I mean who knows perhaps some people just don't want to start growing up, but It's really a
broad term.


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17 Mar 2013, 3:48 pm

You can just as easily grow back into it as you can grow out of it. At least that's my experience. I got to the point where it didn't seem like I was exerting myself to socialize and I felt like I was becoming a natural. Under normal levels of stress that's the way I am. If I'm going to work or school which provides a reasonable amount of stress that most people deal with it doesn't mean I'm going to have trouble socializing. Everyday stress on it's own is something I could handle and still be able to interact with people and feel good about it.

Self-awareness also helped. I knew when I was being annoying or making a faux pas. I could tell I was doing better.

Now I can tell I'm doing worse and having more trouble. I have the self-awareness to realize when I'm making mistakes and I'm making a lot of them lately. I often laugh too loudly and as much as I try not to I'm so anxious that it happens anyway. Lowered self-esteem has contributed to that. When I am confident I am less clumsy because I'm comfortable and therefore I don't make those kind of mistakes and sound obnoxious with my laughter of inappropriate volume. If I'm already feeling unsure of myself and that causes me to make a mistake I notice it and I can feel embarrassment for it which only lowers my self confidence and continues the cycle.

I felt like I grew out of it and I was doing great for a little over a year. It was long enough that I thought I was over it for good. It didn't take much energy at all and it seemed like something I could've maintained forever. Then I entered a period of intense psychological distress and my Autism came flooding back. I lost confidence as part of the depression I entered. My executive functioning deficits increased and I couldn't process information as quickly (including social information). Being slowed down meant I could no longer keep up with a conversation and process all the cues I was being sent. I wouldn't process something for the first 5 seconds and then I'd make a mistake. By the time I processed everything it was a few seconds to late and I had already done something stupid. I realized every mistake I made after making each one and I felt embarrassed every time.


I felt great for about a year and it was such a long time to be continuously successful so I thought I had overcome AS. I gained my sense of smell when I was 10 so why couldn't a social sense develop a decade later than it was supposed to?

There's no way to know if you've truly grown out of AS. Even if you've been doing well for a year like I was it can always come back. A period of crisis could be the thing that brings it all back.



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17 Mar 2013, 4:17 pm

Dizzee wrote:
I think It's possible, but it might be too hard for some of us, I mean who knows perhaps some people just don't want to start growing up, but It's really a
broad term.

I see this tone in many of these threads, and I do find it offensive. Can coping skills be developed...absolutely. People can always improve. The tone of your post says to me that if you continue to struggle, it's your own fault. We should be able to function completely normally, and are lazy if we don't. Correct me if I'm wrong.



Dizzee
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17 Mar 2013, 4:28 pm

MjrMajorMajor wrote:
Dizzee wrote:
I think It's possible, but it might be too hard for some of us, I mean who knows perhaps some people just don't want to start growing up, but It's really a
broad term.

I see this tone in many of these threads, and I do find it offensive. Can coping skills be developed...absolutely. People can always improve. The tone of your post says to me that if you continue to struggle, it's your own fault. We should be able to function completely normally, and are lazy if we don't. Correct me if I'm wrong.

Sorry If I offended you but I meant those people who suspect, not even having a diagnosis who say that they have a disability. Regarding the people who officially got AS I'm not saying that If they try really really hard they might learn to become normal, I'm saying that there's a little chance because we don't have the power to analyze every case.


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Last edited by Dizzee on 17 Mar 2013, 4:51 pm, edited 2 times in total.

tall-p
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17 Mar 2013, 4:37 pm

My 2₵s is that we never think like NTs. They spend a lot of time thinking about the storyline of other people's lives. We don't do that, and keeping up to date on that stuff is a big part of normal folks' socializing. But as I got older, I got more relaxed with other people, my stims disappeared, my special interests turned into "hobbies." My remoteness became "He's eccentric."


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17 Mar 2013, 4:38 pm

If you grow out of Autism, you can't have it in the first place.



Dizzee
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17 Mar 2013, 4:59 pm

Wandering_Stranger wrote:
If you grow out of Autism, you can't have it in the first place.

Arguable, aspergers is just a compilation of various symptoms, diagnosis is used to determine the causes of it. You can't really tell in one sentence what exactly AS is.


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MjrMajorMajor
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17 Mar 2013, 5:07 pm

Dizzee wrote:
Wandering_Stranger wrote:
If you grow out of Autism, you can't have it in the first place.

Arguable, aspergers is just a compilation of various symptoms, diagnosis is used to determine the causes of it. You can't really tell in one sentence what exactly AS is.

What about the numerous studies pointing to unique wiring in autistic brains? This is in addition to other differences that appear prevalent in autism studies...



Dizzee
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17 Mar 2013, 5:13 pm

MjrMajorMajor wrote:
Dizzee wrote:
Wandering_Stranger wrote:
If you grow out of Autism, you can't have it in the first place.

Arguable, aspergers is just a compilation of various symptoms, diagnosis is used to determine the causes of it. You can't really tell in one sentence what exactly AS is.

What about the numerous studies pointing to unique wiring in autistic brains? This is in addition to other differences that appear prevalent in autism studies...

They don't investigate every AS's brain during diagnosis do they? I really don't want to get too deep into this because I really don't know a thing about neuroscience and such, but what if this "brain-wiring" type isn't a constant state?


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Jacoby
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17 Mar 2013, 5:29 pm

I wish I could grow out of my anxiety and obsessive compulsive nature, have a normal social life. It would be kinda sad for it to be impossible to ever learn to cope with these issues.



MjrMajorMajor
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17 Mar 2013, 5:33 pm

Dizzee wrote:
MjrMajorMajor wrote:
Dizzee wrote:
Wandering_Stranger wrote:
If you grow out of Autism, you can't have it in the first place.

Arguable, aspergers is just a compilation of various symptoms, diagnosis is used to determine the causes of it. You can't really tell in one sentence what exactly AS is.

What about the numerous studies pointing to unique wiring in autistic brains? This is in addition to other differences that appear prevalent in autism studies...

They don't investigate every AS's brain during diagnosis do they? I really don't want to get too deep into this because I really don't know a thing about neuroscience and such, but what if this "brain-wiring" type isn't a constant state?


And now we circle back into willing ourselves into normalcy, by sheer willpower I assume? What about self acceptance and working with your strengths?