Do I have Aspergers? Symptoms I have & symptoms I don't

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I wasn't sure whether or not to post this in the "General Autism" section or here because I'm only 14 years old. I decided here. It's probably selfish to make a topic all about myself, and many people have probably made topics in the past titled something like "am I an aspie?" and it might be annoying. But, I'm doing it anyway, sorry :/

I think I'm an aspie but I'm not totally sure. I definitely have some symptoms but there's also many I don't have, so I was wondering if you guys could help me out? I know I shouldn't asked to be diagnosed on this website and I should get professionally tested. My mom has been trying to get me an appointment for months but for some reason they're always busy. My mom thinks it's really stupid of me to think I might have Asperger's but she doesn't understand everything about me even when I try to explain it to her. Well I don't really know where I'm going with this but here are some things that make me think I might have Asperger's.

This is a weird one to start off with, but I heard that apparently kids with Asperger's sometimes grab their crotch? I used to do that all the time when I was around 4 years old, I remember my dad always had to tell me to stop doing that. ...I don't do it anymore, I swear

I'm obsessed with music. Most of my time is spent listening to music or making music. I spend hours pacing in my room with my headphones on. I collect cd's and recently I'm starting to collect vinyl records. Music pretty much dominates my life. I want to be a musician. I believe I have a naturally good musical ear. A few years ago I wasn't into music as much, and I was obsessed with stop motion animation. I was sure I would be an animator. Before that, when I was a toddler and throughout elementary school, I always wrote stories and read books and thought I would be an author. I also made fake album covers with full lyric booklets and tracklistings. Maybe this doesn't have to do with Asperger's at all, though

I pace a lot. I can spend a lot of time just pacing and thinking.

I'm pretty clumsy. Also, I'm very bad at sports and physical education is by far my least favourite class. I'm not athletic at all. I don't have good aim at all, I get scared when the ball is coming toward me, sometimes I get scared of the noises around me, and I often don't know what to do. I usually walk around aimlessly during gym class because I'm useless when it comes to sports. Sometimes the opposite team even passes the ball my way because they know I'll mess up and do something stupid.

I talk to myself a lot. I think everyone talks to themselves, though. Sometimes I make up pretend conversations, and don't even really realize it.

I don't have friends, I used to, but I failed at keeping them. I fail at making friends and I'm pretty sure nobody wants to be my friend anyway because I'm very quiet now and I avoid people.

I'm considered "weird" by others my age. When I was younger people said I was weird in a good way, but now it's like a negative weird Recently someone was about to sit in the seat next to me but he noticed me and got up, and I overheard him saying to his friend "I'm not sitting with him, he's really weird". (not that I wanted him to sit next to me anyway) I always feel left out, like I'm "that weird kid" or something.

I get very uncomfortable at parties and dinners and things like that. I can't stand being around so many people and I'd rather not talk to them. I have to pause a lot, I have trouble translating my thoughts into words, sometimes I stutter or says things I don't really mean. Conversing is very difficult for me. I'm very shy and socially awkward, I can't hand a cashier money without being awkward and clumsy. I think I might have social anxiety to some extent. I get really nervous, worried and easily embarrassed when I'm around people. Also, I usually avoid eye contact when I'm talking to someone, usually without knowing.

I don't wear what's "trendy" and I don't try to be cool and fit in. I guess I have a normal fashion sense overall though I do have some clothes that I get made fun of for wearing. Sometimes my mom comments on what I'm wearing and says my clothes are weird or they don't match. I don't really care. I rarely wear matching socks just because I don't bother to sort them, I just grab whatever socks I can find.

I'm kind of a picky eater.
For some reason I have trouble with meat sometimes and I can't swallow it no matter how much I chew it. Maybe this is unrelated to Asperger's though Also I cannot stand soda or other fizzy drinks. The fizz feels absolutely horrible to me, I don't understand how anyone can drink that stuff.

I tend to notice patterns or make patterns a lot. One example: whenever I'm watching a youtube video or reading an internet article or something, I always have to highlight every other letter in the title and then go back and highlight the letters I skipped. I don't know why, I just like to do it. I often doodle patterns in class.

Flashing and spinning objects and stuff tend to really fascinate me for some reason. While typing this I find myself pausing frequently to look at the flashing ads on the screen

I hate when people show up somewhere too early and I especially worry when I'm expecting someone and they're late. They have to be right on time or else I'm very annoyed.

When I have to go somewhere I need to know way in advance or else I get very frustrated because I don't feel prepared.

I often do repetitive movements like tap my feet or move my legs in a certain way and sometimes I rock back and forth or side to side (I believe it's called stimming) and I usually am not aware I'm doing it.

I naturally walk in an unusual way and I used to get made fun of for it a lot.

I socially isolate myself even though I want friends at the same time.

I get depressed a lot. Sometimes I go through periods where I cycle between feeling hopeless and feeling really positive and confident. It's frustrating.

I get frustrated quite easily.

I can't concentrate on something unless it really interests me. I have problems with homework because of that. I'm also not good at taking notes.

In elementary school, following verbal instructions was always a big problem. I still have problems with that sometimes. And I can't handle many instructions at once, it makes me all confused.

Sometimes I mistake a noise for a voice.

Sometimes my mom tells me I'm yelling when I think I'm speaking at a normal volume. Other times I talk too quiet.

When I hear something that makes me laugh, I usually laugh a lot longer than I should. I try to stifle my laughter, it's a little embarrassing.

I notice I sometimes have odd facial expressions.

When my mom rearranged the living room and bought new furniture I became extremely frustrated and upset and argued with my mom a lot about how she shouldn't change it and everything was fine the way it is. That was around two months ago. I'm over it now.

I like to make lists sometimes. I'll write out a band's discography or the tracklisting of an album, sometimes more than once. I start over if I make a little mistake, the list has to look perfect.

There's some more but that's probably enough So now, here's the things that make me think I might not have Asperger's...

I'm pretty sure I don't have a monotonous voice. I do when I read aloud, but don't a lot of people read like that? Anyway, I'm pretty sure there's a lot of aspies who don't have monotonous voices so I guess this one doesn't really matter.

I'm fine with reading facial expressions as far as I know.

I'm an honest person, but I'm never blunt, at least I don't think I am.

I don't think I lack sympathy. This may be a stereotype, though, I'm not sure. I think I am a sweet person overall, I'm just misunderstood.

I usually understand sarcasm (not always. Sometimes sarcasm confuses me but I get it for the most part. When someone says an expression I usually translate it literally for a second before I realize it's an expression). Sometimes I'm sarcastic myself.

I'm failing algebra. I was always ok in math, but never enjoyed it. This year I'm not doing well at all. Apparently aspies are usually very good at math, at least that's what I've heard/read.

I have decent handwriting.

Sorry if this is too long. Please tell me what you think, though.
Bye

-Noah

It's so interesting how people equate math with aspieness. Why is that? This could only be a stereotype conjured up by images of Rain Man, Sheldon Cooper, Spencer Reid, etc. I've been diagnosed as having Asperger's, but like a lot of other aspies, math is weak with me. You do seem to possess some traits, though. You never know. You're pretty precocious for your age, that's for sure.

The systems you listed that you don't have aren't really true for all aspies (I'm actually diagnosed, and I understand sarcasm and am pretty sure I don't have a monotonous voice). The fact that you lack them doesn't mean your not an aspie. I think your mom is mistaken; you probably do have aspergers. But if she tells the school you go to they might drop you into special ed or something... which could be really excellent, or terrible.

You sound like you could have Asperger's.

You defiantly have traces of Asperger's, there's no way to be certain without been diagnosed professionally though.

I'm 14 (a girl, by the way. i don't know if that's relevant) and can relate to you a lot. But I don't have asperger's. this quack That I went to said that I was somewhere on the spectrum. PDD-NOS maybe. I don't believe him. But you might have it. I'm not a psychologist so I'm not even going to try and diagnose you, but yeah. You certainly have a lot of autistic traits. But everyone does.
I do have some advice concerning your social anxiety, though. Go to the doctor's and get medication for it. That's what people with anxiety do. And it helps. I've been on anxiety medication for a week now and let me tell you, friend... It's awesome.
Oh yeah, and one more thing. This is most important. JUST DO IT. Do you want to talk to someone? Then go up and talk to them. Say hi to people in the halls. I'm sure there are some nice people at your school that you can acquaint yourself with. But you have to do it. Dude, I went one whole year without having a single friend at school. If you don't start making changes, you aren't going to get anywhere. The more you do something, the easier it gets. I used to not even be able to order my food at restaurants. I made my mom do it. I didn't say hi to anyone in the halls, I didn't talk to anyone. But, this past two months, I've been doing things that would normally scare the crap out of me. And it's still hard. But socializing has gotten much, much easier since then. I've made 3 great friends.
And y'know what? Some Kids don't like me. They think I'm weird and awkward and hostile, but THEIR OPINION DOESN'T MATTER! It doesn't!
I'm sorry if I've been no help to you. I'm sorry if I sound rude. I really don't mean to be. if you need any help or need to talk just PM me. I understand what you're going through.