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Being asked how you are

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Do you get annoyed when people ask you how you are?
Yes 40%  40%  [ 36 ]
No 12%  12%  [ 11 ]
Sometimes 47%  47%  [ 42 ]
Total votes : 89

donothing1979
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25 Mar 2013, 1:36 am

Kaede wrote:
I think I get more frustrated than annoyed. I can manage "how're ya?", as that's very common here and can easily be answered with "grand. And yourself?". But occasionally I get asked "what's the craic?". I don't even know what that means! I don't know if they're asking how I am or what am I up to.

What annoys me more is that my automatic response to the question is "fine". As a result, I can't properly answer the question when it's asked by professionals, like my psychiatrist or therapist. I don't know if they're asking how I am or if it's a continuation of the greeting.


"what's the craic"? you're in Ireland.



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25 Mar 2013, 2:49 am

Kaede wrote:
I think I get more frustrated than annoyed. I can manage "how're ya?", as that's very common here and can easily be answered with "grand. And yourself?". But occasionally I get asked "what's the craic?". I don't even know what that means! I don't know if they're asking how I am or what am I greeting.


Doesn't that mean something along the lines of 'What have you been up to?' as in 'has anything interesting or funny happened to you since I saw you last?' Someone said this to me when I went to a wedding in Ireland (somewhere near cork) and that's how I took it and just answered that I hadn't really been up to much. They seemed satisfied with this answer and started to tell me what they had been up to.


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Kaede
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25 Mar 2013, 2:02 pm

donothing1979 wrote:
"what's the craic"? you're in Ireland.


Yes. I don't think anywhere else suffers with that awful phrase.

Kookygirl wrote:
Doesn't that mean something along the lines of 'What have you been up to?' as in 'has anything interesting or funny happened to you since I saw you last?' Someone said this to me when I went to a wedding in Ireland (somewhere near cork) and that's how I took it and just answered that I hadn't really been up to much. They seemed satisfied with this answer and started to tell me what they had been up to.


I'm not sure. My brother is the main person to ask that and I see him almost everyday. Surely nothing interesting could have happened in the previous few hours or he would have been told. He never seems to respond to the question either so it is quite perplexing.



donothing1979
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25 Mar 2013, 2:35 pm

Kaede wrote:
donothing1979 wrote:
"what's the craic"? you're in Ireland.


Yes. I don't think anywhere else suffers with that awful phrase.


well, that's better than hearing "hella" every five minutes... :roll:



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25 Mar 2013, 2:36 pm

Yes, because I always feel like sh*t.



Kaede
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25 Mar 2013, 2:48 pm

donothing1979 wrote:
Kaede wrote:
donothing1979 wrote:
"what's the craic"? you're in Ireland.


Yes. I don't think anywhere else suffers with that awful phrase.


well, that's better than hearing "hella" every five minutes... :roll:


I still hear "like" all the time.



IDontGetIt
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25 Mar 2013, 2:54 pm

After years of annoying people by giving the "wrong" response, I eventually figured out what I'm "supposed" to say. And realised that, actually, I don't darn well want to. :lol:
At least now that I understand it all I can be creative and have fun. Or simply say "Meh". :D



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25 Mar 2013, 3:50 pm

I have to go back and read the replies, but I like being asked how I am. My answer is always a scripted, "pretty good' or, "not bad", and then I return the "how are you", but i like these little pretenses, because it gives me a chance to feel as though I'm normal, and adhering to social convention correctly. Anyway, that's just me :)



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25 Mar 2013, 7:25 pm

ker08 wrote:
I have to go back and read the replies, but I like being asked how I am. My answer is always a scripted, "pretty good' or, "not bad", and then I return the "how are you", but i like these little pretenses, because it gives me a chance to feel as though I'm normal, and adhering to social convention correctly. Anyway, that's just me :)

Most of the time I don't mind giving scripted responses. I just hate when they tell me that I "don't look okay" or ask me what the matter is.


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glow
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25 Mar 2013, 11:23 pm

makes you wanna grab a doily and put it over your head :cry: :roll:



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26 Mar 2013, 12:56 am

Kookygirl wrote:
I hate this too unless something genuinely interesting has happened to me that day that I want to share, but I will normally just share this anyway without being prompted.


^ This. I hate it when people ask inane questions that they really don't want to know the answer to. I asked my mom to stop asking me this because it's tiring, tedious and nobody really cares anyway because in all likelihood my day was exactly like all the days before it. Of course she said I was being rude and that people ask me to show they care about me. I tried to point out that by not asking me, they were acknowledging my preference and showing they cared, but it hasn't sunk in yet because she still asks me how my day was every afternoon.


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donothing1979
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26 Mar 2013, 11:50 am

Kaede wrote:

I still hear "like" all the time.


i don't know if you can get away from that. "A living language is one that changes", and obviously, English is changing. i prefer to sit back and not judge about that too much, because that fact is true. it doesn't bother me as much as it used to before i started thinking about it in terms of how languages change over time.

...still, it doesn't mollify the effect "hella" has on me, though. or "bro"... they both make me bristle.



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26 Mar 2013, 12:25 pm

I hate it. I swear it's a trap.

You are not just supposed to say, "Fine. And you?" You are supposed to say, "Fine. And you?" and really mean it.

If you are not fine, and say you are not fine, you are being selfish, self-absorbed, and rude.

If you are not fine, and say you are fine, then if the other party messes you over or whatever, they have the built-in excuse of saying, "But you never told me! I asked and everything! I really want to know how you are!"

Either way, unless "Fine" is an honest answer, you're screwed.


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26 Mar 2013, 1:07 pm

I cannot describe it as "being annoyed," but rather, being perplexed. I never have an answer prepared for such a question, as it would require much more aforethought than spending only a brief second to say "fine," "OK," or whatever short answer people usually offer. To know how oneself is, one would have to delve fairly deep within one's own mind and calculate exactly how they feel in relation to other states of mind, understand the nature of their existence and whether or not anything of relative importance (rather subjective term) has occurred worthy of being remarked about in addition to the "existential report" they are expected to give. I, therefore, am forced to reply with "I don't know," because I truly do not know "how I am doing." That requires far too much introspection to give a simple reply to. Come back in four decades and see if I have an answer then.