Do girls find it extra hot when big guys bully small guys?

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Alliekit
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29 May 2016, 5:17 am

sly279 wrote:
Alliekit wrote:
Bullying is a complete turn off in what ever form. Someone who protects other weaker people is far more attractive to women as it displays the protector attitude that women seek when looking for a mate.

It's not the dominance itself that is attractive biologically but the ability of a man to be a protector for a women and her future offspring.

:(


Why the sad face?

This is more a deep down evolutionary thing and not necessarily as strong today. After all some women do not fit the type after all



Alliekit
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29 May 2016, 5:30 am

Xenosparadox wrote:

The final sentence is correct. And part of dominance is being able to crush your opponent like a bug without losing your composure. Bullies aren't usually angry or always physically violent. Quite often they use words far more effectively and rely on techniques like baiting(which is what most internet trolling is) to get their target to lash out in anger(AKA "butthurt rage")while they laugh at them.

Using anger as a weapon only works in certain situations. Like one where you are in a position of authority and you want nothing but compliance from your subjects. But asserting dominance, as I said before, involves more covert strategies that allow one to retain his composure but still throw his weight around.


I can't imaging Internet trolls are that good with women.

Also I said that I definitely would not he attracted to bullies as they display no control over their environments. Bullying is a way to try and control people and the environment and people who do this do because they often lack that control.

Some women may feel the same as I do,some my not. Men who people respect and follow are bound to be more attractive in my opinion.

@xfilesgeek was my statement a sweeping generalization? If so I apologise, I meant it as in evolution and not as every woman feel the same



sly279
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29 May 2016, 2:17 pm

Alliekit wrote:
sly279 wrote:
Alliekit wrote:
Bullying is a complete turn off in what ever form. Someone who protects other weaker people is far more attractive to women as it displays the protector attitude that women seek when looking for a mate.

It's not the dominance itself that is attractive biologically but the ability of a man to be a protector for a women and her future offspring.

:(


Why the sad face?

This is more a deep down evolutionary thing and not necessarily as strong today. After all some women do not fit the type after all

I'm not strong, in don't like violence against anyone or creature unless required for defense. I'd never get into s fight over my ladies honor for example.(never understood that, honor shouldn't need defended) I am not rich so I can't provide either. So I don't meet the protector/provider definition.



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30 May 2016, 2:00 am

Women absolutely DO NOT get turned on by bullying, and all the men theorizing are being misogynistic as a result. The truth is many men who are bullies have OTHER traits which women find attractive, but the bullying is a huge turn off.


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marshall
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02 Jun 2016, 10:29 am

Alliekit wrote:
If he bullie weaker people then there is potential for him to be aggressive to me or my offspring. Therefore I would avoid this type for a man who stands up to those bully.

Confidence and strength is attractive. Aggression and inability to control ones anger is not. Those who act cool in situations and don't get angry or violent are shown to be more dominant.

Most bullies are not angry. They have fun tormenting people. They are often confident and arrogant as well. The victims are the ones who wind up angry, tormented by violent thoughts of revenge.



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02 Jun 2016, 5:10 pm

I think actually there are all kinds of people. Both of men and women. So yes there are some women who are attracted by men exerting dominance, even over weaker/vunerable ones.

But I think they are a minority. I believe most girls would be turned off by the ugly behavior.

To me the situation is no loss. I wouldn't be interested in any woman turned on by that sort of thing anyway.



CryingTears15
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04 Jun 2016, 9:18 pm

For me, when I see a guy bullying someone, that's an immediate "nevermind".

However, guys who pick on other people are often the more confident types. If a man is confident, I assume he has a reason to be, and that makes him much more attractive. Confidence is correlated with bullying, in my experience, and I would guess it's the confidence these girls are attracted to, not the bullying.



marshall
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04 Jun 2016, 10:51 pm

CryingTears15 wrote:
For me, when I see a guy bullying someone, that's an immediate "nevermind".

However, guys who pick on other people are often the more confident types. If a man is confident, I assume he has a reason to be, and that makes him much more attractive. Confidence is correlated with bullying, in my experience, and I would guess it's the confidence these girls are attracted to, not the bullying.

I would assume this kind of attraction is superficial though, similar to looks. A guy who is really stuck up might cause sexual arousal because of the "confidence" factor, but would it really make a woman want to "love" him? A guy so in love with himself isn't likely to give any love back. These narcissistic/sociopath bully guys are robots. They rarely have feelings themselves.



Alliekit
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05 Jun 2016, 5:00 am

marshall wrote:
CryingTears15 wrote:
For me, when I see a guy bullying someone, that's an immediate "nevermind".

However, guys who pick on other people are often the more confident types. If a man is confident, I assume he has a reason to be, and that makes him much more attractive. Confidence is correlated with bullying, in my experience, and I would guess it's the confidence these girls are attracted to, not the bullying.

I would assume this kind of attraction is superficial though, similar to looks. A guy who is really stuck up might cause sexual arousal because of the "confidence" factor, but would it really make a woman want to "love" him? A guy so in love with himself isn't likely to give any love back. These narcissistic/sociopath bully guys are robots. They rarely have feelings themselves.


There is a massive difference between confidence and being stuck up. I don't think that all guys woth confidence are bullies.

Confidence to be yourself and do things is amazingly sexy and is what women can fall in love with about a person. Stuck up jerks are overconfident and annoying, most will get initial attraction from a women and, in most cases, not much more.



marshall
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05 Jun 2016, 5:18 pm

Alliekit wrote:
marshall wrote:
CryingTears15 wrote:
For me, when I see a guy bullying someone, that's an immediate "nevermind".

However, guys who pick on other people are often the more confident types. If a man is confident, I assume he has a reason to be, and that makes him much more attractive. Confidence is correlated with bullying, in my experience, and I would guess it's the confidence these girls are attracted to, not the bullying.

I would assume this kind of attraction is superficial though, similar to looks. A guy who is really stuck up might cause sexual arousal because of the "confidence" factor, but would it really make a woman want to "love" him? A guy so in love with himself isn't likely to give any love back. These narcissistic/sociopath bully guys are robots. They rarely have feelings themselves.


There is a massive difference between confidence and being stuck up. I don't think that all guys woth confidence are bullies.

Confidence to be yourself and do things is amazingly sexy and is what women can fall in love with about a person. Stuck up jerks are overconfident and annoying, most will get initial attraction from a women and, in most cases, not much more.

In terms of overall character, I would rate being a good person above confidence. Someone with confidence who is an as*hole isn't better than someone without confidence who is caring. It seems like confidence trumps overall character when it comes to sexual attraction though. Good looks tend to trump overall character as well (for both sexes), unfortunately. At least when it comes to sexual attraction that is. This is why I view it as a shallow trait in the grand scheme of things (similar to looks).

Also, it seems confidence is something that can be gained, while having a decent character is more innate. People who are born assholes tend to stay that way. People who are innately self-centered don't tend to change, unfortunately. People who lack confidence can gain confidence if they have more success and become better at things that make them happy. People lose confidence when they are constantly measured by their shortcomings instead of their strengths.



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09 Jun 2016, 2:46 pm

Alliekit wrote:
marshall wrote:
CryingTears15 wrote:
For me, when I see a guy bullying someone, that's an immediate "nevermind".

However, guys who pick on other people are often the more confident types. If a man is confident, I assume he has a reason to be, and that makes him much more attractive. Confidence is correlated with bullying, in my experience, and I would guess it's the confidence these girls are attracted to, not the bullying.

I would assume this kind of attraction is superficial though, similar to looks. A guy who is really stuck up might cause sexual arousal because of the "confidence" factor, but would it really make a woman want to "love" him? A guy so in love with himself isn't likely to give any love back. These narcissistic/sociopath bully guys are robots. They rarely have feelings themselves.


There is a massive difference between confidence and being stuck up. I don't think that all guys woth confidence are bullies.

Confidence to be yourself and do things is amazingly sexy and is what women can fall in love with about a person. Stuck up jerks are overconfident and annoying, most will get initial attraction from a women and, in most cases, not much more.


I agree, I think that many guys who are confident aren't bullies, but many are, and I think that girls might see that confidence and like it initially.

Some girls are actually attracted to a-holes, don't ask me why, but I think that it's just them as a minority. Maybe enough that such guys always have a girl, but most girls don't like that.



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09 Jun 2016, 3:53 pm

I don't think bully's victims are seen as sexy either.

Also there's a strong height/size correlation in bullying among boys: Big boys often bully small boys.

I don't ever recall once a boy bullying another boy of the same size, there's always this size gap.

and we all know which of the two girls find generally sexier (tall vs small).



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09 Jun 2016, 4:01 pm

I've been bullied by kids who were the same height as me.



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09 Jun 2016, 4:29 pm

Ratae wrote:
. . .

So, ladies, do you like this kind of macho, dominant behaviour in males? I mean, women are attracted to dominance right? And many ladies love the stronger-built looking chaps that can protect them from other males. So why SHOULD they not be attracted to male bullies that have a physical authority over smaller, weaker men.? I mean that's the order of things in animal kingdom - the larger males dominate and bully the smaller males, so why shouldn't it be that way with humans?


I find it repulsive. I find most forms of hand-to-hand physical violence (as opposed to fighting with weapons) repulsive, including sports like boxing, wrestling and fisticuffs. I can't enjoy watching it and will sometimes turn off a favorite program like Criminal Minds if it's about brawling or boxing instead of facing off an unsub with a knife at gunpoint.

That said, I'm on the spectrum myself and have been a bully-magnet. I've been bullied, and I don't like to see bullying. I'm ISFJ on the Myers-Briggs chart, and that personality type is known to be disturbed by seeing the strong take advantage of the weak.

So I can't speak for neurotypical women, or for other personality types. I'm sure there are women who get off on seeing males they like pummel weaker males. But I do not understand such attraction, and to me this kind of behavior seems sociopathic more than anything else.


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10 Jun 2016, 4:01 am

LyraLuthTinu wrote:
So I can't speak for neurotypical women, or for other personality types. I'm sure there are women who get off on seeing males they like pummel weaker males. But I do not understand such attraction, and to me this kind of behavior seems sociopathic more than anything else.

So in a hypothetical situation if you saw one guy bully another one, you would pick a bullied guy over a bully, right?



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10 Jun 2016, 4:20 am

i once had a dream which i awoke from and continued to develop as a possible story until i lost interest in it.
it went like this.
i was stranded on a remote island with 10 very athletic and dominant men and 10 very magazine quality looking girls.
the men saw me as a wimp and pushed me around and ate the food i was intelligent enough to acquire, and the women saw me as an ineffectual person who did not have the gusto to successfully stand up for myself against the men who just pushed me out of the way and grabbed what i had made and took it for themselves (like my living quarters and my fish farm and my garden).
i just wanted to live on my own, but the island was small and i was forced to interact by the tyranny of proximity with them.
i was not prepared to tolerate such an impediment to my survival, and so one by one, over a period of weeks, the men started to disappear.

woman x: where's blake?
woman y: yeah he's been gone for too long now! i hope he hasn't had an accident.
me: death by misadventure is a possibility i would consider likely in cases like this.
woman x: what do you mean by that?!
me: well he was certainly a daring man, and sometimes, people like that fail to take into account the finer details of their environment and possible results of their actions.
woman y: i don't trust you you slimey little f*ck! have you done something to him?
me: how could i do that? me?
woman y: yes you're right. you couldn't have done anything.
me: i'm glad you see it that way.

the next week, another man went missing and i was similarly astonished and puzzled and suggested that all the bravest people in history died young.


blah blah...
eventually i was the only male left on the island, and all the women knew that it must be the case that i arranged the other men's demise, and most of those women hated me for what they thought i had done.

but they were too terrified to attempt to dispose of me, and one by one, they started to go missing.

i was left with one girl who was psychiatrically disturbed, and who was impressed in a sick way with my character, and we lived happily ever after.