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zacb
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12 May 2013, 3:04 pm

Well, I have no problem asking girls out as far as a warm approach (some experience with them.). Perhaps I should have stated that. I am trying to cold approach.



1000Knives
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12 May 2013, 3:25 pm

Don't even bother approaching "cold" or "hot" or whatever. I do think the whole advice of "talk to them like you would anyone else" is sorta right. Which is why I said don't care. Some people will like you and some people won't. Dwelling on the problem only makes it worse. So I feel it's better to not think about your problem of lack of a girlfriend, and just move on with life.

Also, what makes you "alpha" or not is testosterone levels, plain and simple. Take some test booster teas or pills, and go talk to girls. You'll find it's a lot more fluid. Or better, work out. I was told by a psychologist my eye contact was "good," (which surprised me) and I've not even specifically "worked" on eye contact, I just work out more often and probably have better hormone balances and increased visual spatial skills.



Popsicle
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13 May 2013, 5:31 am

Cold approach? I hope you won't get caught up in that whole line some people (who coincidentally make their living selling this ethos to others) spout, about a man's worth is directly connected to the notches on his bed post (how many different women he's had sex with.)

Guys who fall for that keep reaching for that ego boost and wind up taking sex tours in distant lands and/or with a slew of STDs.

Quality, not quantity, IMO.



zacb
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15 May 2013, 6:00 pm

Hey folks, got a prospect. Met at the library. Thanks for the support.



mattarga
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15 May 2013, 6:03 pm

Good deal! :thumleft: Best of luck. :)


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16 May 2013, 12:59 pm

zacb wrote:
Sorry if I am rambling, but I am just angry. I went out today, trying to hit on chicks, and absolutely no freakin chicks in town. And even if there were, I am nervous as hell, not knowing if I should go "zen" (not think , just do), or "be myself" (whatever the hell that means). Then I tried asking, albeit annoyingly, and I was banned, but at least not on the forum. Add to that, people say be your self, but this f***ing nagging feeling keeps nagging me. I dont know if it is dating or wtf, but I wish I could release what I have to say, but I am worried I will sound like an idiot. Be yourself. God , I wonder if I could get some medicinal pot. Maybe I'll ask my doctor, because it is depressing the hell out of me. But there have been some promising signs. On the way to the library the other day, there was one chick who drove by two times, and I waved each. Another was rubbing her face like she had a beard, but wa sprobably because of my shave. I said hi and whats up. The girls giggled, but they were in a car, and I was checki g to see where my "date" was (long story). I am sorry, I just struggling with"who I am". Do people really want to hear my sh** about counter economics, finance, baseball, stocks, my f**** up humor (think George Carlin and Doug Stanhope), my f***ing treaties on things, or my next idea to change the world? Thanks for bearing withme. :D


Zacb,

Your frustrations, and your anger, is perfectly understandable. People often give the well meaning platitude "be yourself", because that's what they hear from other people, and they think it works. I would make this argument- love, dating, relationships- they have little rules you have to play by, and things that you should say and shouldn't say to do well in either.

In all honesty, in my opinion, dating and relationships are a game. You have to know the right things to say and the right things to do, to stay in your spouse's good grace, or else you temporarily or permanently "lose". You have to know the right things to say and do to get a date. It is all about knowing the rules- what to say and what to do.

Being yourself, that comes after you start seriously dating a person, and start getting to know them better. You can't pull out all your interests in the beginning, otherwise she will be overwhelmed and turned off to you. I know, it happened to me before.

Love- I can't tell you anything about that. The word itself makes me angry thinking about how much I've struggled trying to establish relationships in the past.

My advice to you:

Look up books on how to attract women. No, I'm talking about player/pick-up artist books, like Mystery Method or the Game, but like Jad T. Jones's "How to Get A Girlfriend" and David Wygant's "Always Talk to Strangers: 3 Simple Steps to Finding the Love of your life". I learned a lot about women just by reading those 2 books. Good luck!



zacb
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17 May 2013, 11:45 am

I see. Might look at those. Trying to step out and say hi. Btw, like you avater :) .