F***ing Angry.
Don't even bother approaching "cold" or "hot" or whatever. I do think the whole advice of "talk to them like you would anyone else" is sorta right. Which is why I said don't care. Some people will like you and some people won't. Dwelling on the problem only makes it worse. So I feel it's better to not think about your problem of lack of a girlfriend, and just move on with life.
Also, what makes you "alpha" or not is testosterone levels, plain and simple. Take some test booster teas or pills, and go talk to girls. You'll find it's a lot more fluid. Or better, work out. I was told by a psychologist my eye contact was "good," (which surprised me) and I've not even specifically "worked" on eye contact, I just work out more often and probably have better hormone balances and increased visual spatial skills.
Cold approach? I hope you won't get caught up in that whole line some people (who coincidentally make their living selling this ethos to others) spout, about a man's worth is directly connected to the notches on his bed post (how many different women he's had sex with.)
Guys who fall for that keep reaching for that ego boost and wind up taking sex tours in distant lands and/or with a slew of STDs.
Quality, not quantity, IMO.
Zacb,
Your frustrations, and your anger, is perfectly understandable. People often give the well meaning platitude "be yourself", because that's what they hear from other people, and they think it works. I would make this argument- love, dating, relationships- they have little rules you have to play by, and things that you should say and shouldn't say to do well in either.
In all honesty, in my opinion, dating and relationships are a game. You have to know the right things to say and the right things to do, to stay in your spouse's good grace, or else you temporarily or permanently "lose". You have to know the right things to say and do to get a date. It is all about knowing the rules- what to say and what to do.
Being yourself, that comes after you start seriously dating a person, and start getting to know them better. You can't pull out all your interests in the beginning, otherwise she will be overwhelmed and turned off to you. I know, it happened to me before.
Love- I can't tell you anything about that. The word itself makes me angry thinking about how much I've struggled trying to establish relationships in the past.
My advice to you:
Look up books on how to attract women. No, I'm talking about player/pick-up artist books, like Mystery Method or the Game, but like Jad T. Jones's "How to Get A Girlfriend" and David Wygant's "Always Talk to Strangers: 3 Simple Steps to Finding the Love of your life". I learned a lot about women just by reading those 2 books. Good luck!