Stress in new work

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As I consider myself as half asperger and half neurotypical, there is something which is very hard for me to express my feeling to others.

Currently I have switched to a new job, from a professional firm focusing in auditing to a land development firm focusing on accounting data analysis. There is a huge change of environment that, on one hand, my job amount is substantially reduced, on the other hand, I have to cope with new colleagues. In technical aspect, I am used to be outstanding in prior firm, but now, my technical skills are hardly utilised. It gives me a very depressed feeling that I am trapped in a stupid conditioned environment.

My work in previous auditor work environment includes planning, staff scheduling, negotiation with client, field visit to client office and inspection of the accounting figures, drafting of financial statement reports. Throughout this process, I amquite expert in catching up the chains between the process and capable of spotting major errors. Eventually, I resigned, because of an extreme harsh work environment prospect.

And now, it "should" be very happy for me to be my position. Since I only need to hand in simple report and analysis in monthly basis. In the rest of the time, I can utilise them for doing private things. Of course, alternatively, I studied the property market to allow me to familiarise my current industry. The more challenging things are actually how I deal with my colleagues. This is the part I feel painful. The colleagues are friendly to me, by going around me, doing chit chat, inviting me to play card games during resting session. I joined and involved since I enrolled this company. Despite my poor judgment in human's reaction, they are giving positive feedbacks to me.

However, when I get back home I get depressed immediately such that I hide myself at my room more often. On one hand, I am afraid of failure, on the other hand, there is actually no real incident that indicate my failure. I am kind of trapped in my own mind again.

I want to share myself here not because I want to find any actual solution. I think my knowledge of asperger has give me enough idea how far I can go. However, I really want to know whether there is someone alike me. Someone that can have the same feeling that gives me "resonance".

Wish everyone has a very nice career. Apologize for my poor english, if I am not presenting properly.

Just now, my colleagues just passed by asking me what I am doing. I instantly hide my window because it's very hard for me to actually gives response.

He asked me: "what's your interest?". I say, "well, some sort of philosophy and psychology stuff."

I hope I expressed enough to others while not really keep myself in a state of "hiding too much secret". ~.~

William,

I don't have a solution really. Just that in my last job, I did not get to use 1/3 of my talents either and the mood I had only changed when I switched to my current job.

As for being social, it is okay to be quiet. Do not get depressed, and I know how hard that is to actually follow, about your social stuff at your workplace. You are trying, and that is what counts in the long run. Maybe you can try and make a game of seeing afterwards if you can link a specific piece of information with a staff member name so at least you have something to ask questions about.

For example, my coworker has a picture of a dog on her computer desktop, so I ask how her dog Georgie is doing. That is what is more important, trying hard at the one on ones. And, to my knowledge, that is where Aspies can excel better at.

Thanks managertina.

You are right that we have to get along with people one by one. As for me, I cannot remember enough of the colleagues names just by going through a very fast hand shaking process. Last time when my boss assigned me to an alternative office in Shanghai, I have to meet lots of the colleagues one by one.The chatting process various from a few second to a few minutes. Afterwards, I have remained very vague impression on those people. In compensation, I have to review the business cards and one organisation charts that one colleague of mine drawn for me.

One of my strategy is to be friend of a very very talkative person. As long as I had any stupid stuff, such as not knowing how to fill in a form, I will ask that person. Here I find a colleague, John, being about to break lots of ice for me.

But of course, I am more talented in very technical financial accounting area. Stupidity in lots of miscellaneous stuff in daily life are only another part of me.

William,

There are things all of us need to be "with it" in and things we all let slip. I used to think that as a supervisor, I had to know everything. But I can't! I even forget where the darn first aid kit is. So I have to ask the clerks at a lower pay level where they are sometimes. Or various forms that I only sometimes use. And you know what? They get to feel that they are the expert in telling me.
That is one thing that I learned at my "failed" job: how to let other people share their knowledge.

And you will learn that that is ok too.

Sometimes, if this is in a networking situation: take the business card of the person, and then afterward, write down one or two key things that that person told you. Do not wait five minutes: do it then.

After a conversation, because I am verbal, I repeat the one or two things about that conversation that I can remember, and think, "Wendy told me that" and I write it down somewhere. Because having conversations sometimes needs to be a bit scripted. But this is okay! It is all part of who some of us are as Aspies.

Please take heart (or, in other words, keep trying!), William,

as i am only one year or two older than you. I learned this stuff too at the age of 27.

Tina