The big bang theory lol

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Ok, so like, Adam and Eve got horny and screwed, and began spitting out babies like like nobody's business, and before you knew it there were entire villiages of imbred children, and this is the big bang theory of creation (Note to not take me seriously I'm just goofing off).

Before the Big Bang their was the Big Crunch which ended the universe. Then the universe was reborn. This cycle of contraction and expansion has been happening without beginning or end.

OK, if you say so, we all agree with you, just put the inflatable doll down...

(somebody please bring me the straightjacket and two big men, this guy is going to snap)

It's nice to imagine the universe expanding and contracting rhythmically forever like an enormous heart, and it's really lovely and poetic, but Newton's Second Law of Thermodynamics (entropy, no perpetual motion, etc.) rules it out. The universe did have a definite beginning, and it will have a definite end.

People damn lol, this thread was a joke, your taking it too seriously.

That depends how you define this universe. If you count the 5th dimension as a part of the universe then it is possible, but unlikely that there is no beginning or end to this universe to this space/time continuum. If you count the other higher dimensions then you can see that it is impossible to conceive of a overall begin and end to all universes combined.
If this seams very alien then try reading Rob Bryanton's Book "Imagining the Tenth Dimension". It's a very clear and simple explanation.

No need to worry about any bangs..big or small..the universe is never ending, in any direction, for any distance...remember, all the rules, laws and theories are what WE have conceived, and nature just has a way of letting us know that we just haven't figured it out yet....but it makes for a nice hobby

we are all in a false vacuum any moment that vacuum could fall into a lower energy level and the universe will no longer be livable for us

But the laws of thermodynamics are very real. Have you ever seen a perpetual motion machine? I haven't. And the universe itself is only the biggest, most complex machine in existence. It'll wind down and stop eventually, even if it's trillions of years from now. It'll either continue to spread into ethereal nothingness, or collapse into cold, lifeless ice and stone. That's not a matter of if, it's a matter of when.

Then what? Nothing? In theory, "nothing" cannot exist because anything that one would consider "nothing" is actually "something"

Even in the vaccuum of space, nothing does not exist (from wiki):
"However, supposing such a region existed, it would still not be "nothing", since it has properties and a measureable existence as part of the quantum-mechanical vacuum."

So if the universe had a beginning and an end, what came before and what comes after?

The Big Bang and the big crunch does not effect us now, and scientists estimate that it won't effect us for many more years to come.

Hell, the Big Bang could be the start of YOUR life and the Big Crunch could be the END of your life.