Do female Aspies prefer male company over female?

Page 5 of 5 [ 70 posts ]  Go to page Previous  1, 2, 3, 4, 5


User avatar

Joined: 21 Sep 2019
Gender: Female
Posts: 5,447
Location: Outter Quadrant

29 Sep 2019, 2:58 pm

Alterity wrote:
I'll take whatever I can get Lol

When I was young I had female friends. But I've noticed as I've gotten older, if I can stop being so shy and anxious, I tend to have better luck with males.

I don't think I really have a preference, I just seem to do better with males.

In all seriousness , finding , must agree with you . (Allergy to cattyness),but do like cats , oddly enuff .

Diagnosed hfa
Loves velcro,
where ever you go ,there you are

Mona Pereth

Joined: 11 Sep 2018
Age: 62
Gender: Female
Posts: 3,342
Location: New York City (Queens)

13 Mar 2020, 7:53 am

In general I tend (with quite a few exceptions) to find men easier to communicate with than women, probably because men tend to be more assertive, and because I'm just not into standard girly stuff for the most part (except for sewing when I was younger). Also nearly all the social settings I've ever been involved with as an adult, both on and off the job, have been predominantly male. Yet most of my closest friends over the years have been women.

- Autistic in NYC - Resources and new ideas for the autistic adult community in the New York City metro area.
- My life as one of the many belatedly-diagnosed autistic older people.
- Queens groups on


User avatar

Joined: 19 Jun 2016
Age: 25
Gender: Female
Posts: 388
Location: A place within a place in the Universe

02 Apr 2020, 7:29 am

I have both female and male friends and I value both. I've been friends with one of my guy friends since 2007. When I was younger, it was especially more prominent meshing more with males than females, and that still plays a role.

But now that I'm at a stage where I've gotten unwanted advances from new guys in my life and it's been happening frequently, it's... complicated when a new guy comes into my life.

Some of my guy friends, I could joke and be more carefree with than a lot of my female friends. I'm not really into fashion, and other stuff like that so the general scope of the interests of some girls get lost in translation with me.

A lot of instances with not fitting in or with being bullied were with other females. A lot of the males I've met would never get as catty as some of the female bullies I've delt with in the past.

All glory to the hypnotoad.

INTP 9w1-5w4-2w3 sp/so


User avatar

Joined: 2 Feb 2008
Age: 72
Gender: Male
Posts: 4,615
Location: Where the Great Plains meet the Northern Pines

02 Apr 2020, 10:38 am

My AS mother spent almost all her time alone or with women, but was not at all "feminine."


User avatar

Joined: 23 Feb 2010
Gender: Female
Posts: 19,625
Location: South-East England

02 Apr 2020, 12:23 pm

I do find NT females my age rather difficult to get past the acquaintance stage with and I don't really know why. I do get along with just about anyone but no matter how interested I am in them or how friendly, chatty, funny, etc, I am I still seem to be ghosted. I try not to be too eager but I try not to be too distant either.

I find guys are less shallow and just accept me for who I am. I do have some female friends but they aren't NTs, or if they are they're older than me, as in their 50s and 60s.

Aged 30
On antidepressants
Diagnosed with AS, ADHD and anxiety disorder
Empathy score: 61 out of a possible 80. (High)

Blue Jay
Blue Jay

User avatar

Joined: 26 Feb 2020
Gender: Female
Posts: 90
Location: New Orleans, LA

02 Apr 2020, 1:37 pm

I have always gotten along better with boys or men than women. I can't relate to the bickering, backstabbing, catty nature of the ultra feminine and soap opera type lifestyle a lot of women seem to desire. I prefer openness, saying exactly what you mean, getting straight to the point, and confronting your problems face on. There's no bull s**t with my guy friends; whereas I feel like I have to mask more around females in order to not seem like a complete weirdo. I can talk about my nerdy interests, be "vulgar" and honest, and relax around men. The only time I don't feel comfortable around men is when they have an interest in me that is other than friendship. I find that women who are more down-to-earth and level headed are good company as well. I don't want drama and pointless conversations from anyone, male or female. If I can have a meaningful exchange with someone, that is rare and worth remembering.

“Be the change you wish to see in the world.” -Buddha
"It takes all the running you can do, to keep in the same place. If you want to get somewhere else, you must run at least twice as fast as that!" -Alice in Wonderland
"I know that I know nothing." -Socrates

Diagnosed with ADHD, general anxiety disorder, chronic severe depression. In the process of obtaining an ASD diagnosis.

AQ from Psychology Tools: 45