is using the word fa***t jokingly offensive?

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I think it's irresponsible. Even if you know for a fact that you're not a homophobe, when you joke around with those words in public, you never know who might be listening. You might be contributing to the overall atmosphere that says homophobia is no big deal.

welcome to the real world ! people are jerks hopefully you will figure it out sooner than I did, : and I do hope it wont scar you for life like it has to me ,though I keep my jerkiness to myself , unless I'm here as I know I can be myself

If you use a word to marginalize someone or categorize them as "lesser," then it is offensive. Both to the person being marginalized and to the group being described as "other."

It's amazing how language can differ. This, honestly, is the first thing I think of when I here the word:



Is the word actually seen as a bad really insult amongst gay people?

Where I was brought up, Fags=cigarettes.

I don't usually mind it. Depends on context and frequency. If someone says it all the time, it could get annoying. If they say it in a derogatory way towards a gay person, it's more likely to annoy me. But again, it depends on context, tone of voice, delivery etc as if they're describing someone I'd personally call a "fag," vs. a "gay person," then I might completely agree with it's appropriate use & it may even be funny. Depends on so many factors. Regardless, if you find yourself worrying it may be offensive - just don't say it.. pick something more universally socially acceptable like "jerk," or "a-hole," or something like that.

It is tiger. It should tell you something about the word that WP has censored the word fa***t. Yet I can still type the word n****r without it being censored.

I personally detest the word. I don't use it often as a gay/bicurious male.
Hehe. Reminds me of a skit from South Park : "See, it's OK for me to say F*GT, because I'm gay. You can't. You're straight"

I reminds me of the episode where all the boys were calling the bikers Fags and the adults were all concerned about them using the term derogatorily and the kids had to explain that they didn't mean it as in homosexual, but rather, just that the bikers were a bunch of Fags. lol I thought it was pretty funny.

" Starbucks is full of fa***ts."
"OMG, that is a totally offensive stereo type!"
"What? It is a fact."
"You sound like a red neck conservative republican living in a trailer park!"
"THAT is a racist offensive stereo type."
"Your right, sorry."



One of the funniest and most offensive conversations I have ever heard. The word fa***t is bad in almost all cases, easier to avoid it all together.

It's okay to call women sluts b*****s and hoes. Are those who do that often femaphobes?

Misogynists, IMO. And generally, I don't think it's okay to call women "sluts", "b*****s" and "hoes".

What I'd like to know is why the words "slut" and "ho" usually refer to women ... as if they're the ones with a proclivity towards licentiousness.

Those are terms used in actuality to put a woman in her place. It's double standards.

When you're a virgin, you're still a slut.

When you wear cut off shorts, slut

When you refuse to sleep with someone, slut.

When you fight back against someone trying to rape you, slut.

I've called straight men who think like this "fa***t" before because I know what the end result is when you tell them to stop or you find it offensive. There's not really many insults you can toss out at privileged straight men who don't have much to worry about. fa***t seems to be the only one because it's all about hierarchy while women face many that could ruin her reputation or put her in a defensive stance.
Men take pride in being sluts, it's called "stud".

Gay men and women are treated with disdain by these types of "men" so they have little to no understanding of the mind of someone who may just be bashed often. They have no reason to have thick skin so suddenly, there is this word that makes them feel the same way a woman feels when she is called a slut, whore or c**t. as*hole doesn't trigger the same response. b***h, douchebag etc..

Very rarely use the word fa***t unless I want a straight man to stfu. I'm sorry if that offends anyone here as that is not my intent but I'd never say that to a gay man. Not out of being a coward but more so as someone who understands how it feels to be bashed and expected to just take it when I'm not taking it nor will I ever.

When I'm on my death bed my last words will most likely be STFU you douchebag...then I'll croak.

Being gay, the only person I am interested in hearing that word from is another gay man. It is a word stripped of any malice, coming from a gay guy. It's actually funny coming from a gay guy. My former lover and I would jokingly call each other "fa***t," or "cocksucker," and we'd laugh and smile. Let that word be overheard in public, and my neck will straighten up quickly and a problem could be brewing.

I can relate to this, but I'm also ok with close friends using it in certain contexts. Other times when I know full well they're just joking/teasing, it becomes annoying and I feel like telling them not to say the word - and have.

Further, it depends on context even between gay friends, as the word "Fag," can certainly be used derogatorily when referring to "fags," vs. "gay men/homosexuals." ie flamboyantly queer reeeeally out there look like they're dressed for a pride parade 24/7 kind of gays.

But yeah, I feel ya on hearing it in public from people who have no real business saying it since they only ever use the words negatively or derogatorily. Makes me want to say something or confront them, but I never do. It makes my ears perk up & I pay attention to what they're saying and think about how rude and nasty they are, but I always decide it's not worth the argument or confrontation because chances are they won't learn a thing & I run the risk of getting into an argument or a fight that I'm not interested in in the least bit. If it was ever more than just a few rude words & I was witnessing someone "gay bashing," and literally getting physical with someone, by all means I'd step up and defend whomever needed defending. At 6'2" 195lbs or so and in decent physical shape, I'm fully capable of defending myself or others - but restrained enough not to ever start s**t because I'm not a fighter. Do something to harm someone else, though, and damn rights I'll knock you into next week and then stick around to tell the police exactly why you got your ass kicked. I've never had to do it, but I would.

This. It's basically saying that gays should be burned, comparing them to kindling. So would he be bothered? ... he may, but considering the weight of hate the word still carries for A lot of people no I would not use it. I personally feel slightly scared or at least very uncomfortable when I hear it because it shows that I'm unwanted in a sense, and even If they know it's not serious the word still carries meaning when used outside of extremely friendly contexts (What you said doesn't exactly count) Your friend my be ok but to avoid unneeded harm I'd stop using it.