I can't let go of the nice past y-y

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I used to be best friends with someone on another site, but I don't think he cares anymore, and I'm heartbroken. Really, I thought I saw him online yesterday, when we were talking, and I thought he would at least say somehting becausey someone else was there, but no he disappeared, I sent a PM, and when I said he could delete it, I DIDN'T MEAN HE COULD WITHOUT REPLYING!! !! !!

I'm so upset. I left the site because I thought it would help me get off him, and give him time to relax and stuff. But no, as soon as I came back, normal service was resumed. I want to know what he really thinks of me, if he really is tryng to avoid me or not, and EXACTLY what I'm doing wrong. I want him to treat me like all the other members. I don't remember the last time he said "Hi Jess!" to me, but he says hi to most others. And I want to have normal conversations as well, but that doens't happen when I'm around. As you said back in the summer, he seems to cease saying anything when I'm around. So I want to know if he IS avoiding me or not.

One thing I don't really want him to know is that...I think I had feelings for him that I denied. For obvious reasons. I mean, ONLINE!! !! !! And if he knew, it would be too awkward. I KNOW he can't AND won't reciprocate if he did know. I don't think I have them as much as I used to, but that doesn't stop me from being heartbroken, that doesn't stop me from being obsessed. I wish I didn't care.

But I'm tired of the arguements, yet I can't stop thinking about this, no matter how much I try. I just want to be treated normally, and I kind of want soeone else to talk some sense into him. I gave up trying myself, because he obviously won't listen to me, but he might be more likely to reply to someone else.

I'm just upset right now but I don't want to be forced to go away from the site again. I want to go when I want to go, which is not right now. And his birthday is coming up soon, and I want to be nice to him, but how can I when he's not being very nice to me? I don't think he'll deserve recognition from me if this carries on. So what can I do?

I think, and it will be hard to do, that you need to ask him whether he wants to continue the friendship or end it. This is probably the best way of sorting the problem out quickly but it will be difficult to take either response. I have literally just gone through within the last week what you are now and while it is hard and hurts I know that because I asked them the question, I could start the grieving process and get on with life. I don't know if there is a support worker or counsellor that you see and, if you do see one, let them know what is going on as they may have more advice to offer.

If you do ask him and he says that he wants to end the friendship, then, if you are comfortable to, PM me and I can tell you in greater detail how I am coping with loosing two friends recently. If he says that he wants to continue the friendship, then ask him POLITLEY to continue to communicate with you.

I wish you the best of luck whatever depiction you make

SRT

I don't really want to talk to him anymore if he won't talk to me, He's had his chances. Now I want someone else's view on it. I won't give him any more chances, I'm done!!

Time to make new friends

it's hug time for you.

I'd let it go. I kinda remember a previous post of yours similar to this and its pretty clear you still have feelings for him.

But the issue isn't you, the issue is him. Yes, people who are like this are insensitive, because many times the individual would back off if given an explanation but not all the time does that happen.

As someone who had an online only relationship/friendship that never translated to real life, I can tell you that the effort isn't worth it. She refused to talk to me about it and went from warm and friendly to cold and hostile if she did talk--with one to two word responses. "Oh okay". or "Ok"

It ended when I tried to call and she threatened to call the police on me just for calling twice. (The first time she hung up and also to top it off she never said I could not call.)

Sometimes people have qualities in them that appeal to you and cause you to have feelings--but they are still not who you want them to be. This person doesn't deserve your attention as a friend or otherwise.

Sweet Pea hugs

Well, I've decided to try to avoid him for a few days, I'm currently going through a "Well, if you do this to me, then I'll do it to you," phase, because what goes around comes around, so I'll see how he likes it. ¬7¬

Good choice.

Ye, except I've cooled down a bit now, and it has been a few days. Tomorrow, I'm going to give it one more try, since I have somehting I want to tell him that is something we now have in common after last night. But if he doens't respond or doesn't care, or is indifferent, then that's it.

Is it possible that you've each had different ideas of what this friendship was? Honestly, I'm a person whose most valued relationships are in real life. I have one person I know online whom I view as a father figure, but that's all. He might have had fun talking to you, but didn't attach much significance to it, aside from a good way to pass the time. That's what the internet is for a great many people: a way to pass the time. I know for aspies, it can be a lot more, but still, one must take these things into consideration.