All Aspie kids should be taught creative skills

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As someone who is approaching the age of 30 I know from experience that being talented academically is not enough to form friendships with others.

Where many Aspies have difficulties is in doing things other people can appreciate. Having knowledge or a great logical mind, while laudable and very useful, do not often unlock the door to social success.

To any parents out there with Aspie kids I ask you to please teach them a creative skill. Put a lot of effort into it and it will probably transform your child's life.

If I could have played the guitar, performed magic tricks or juggled in high school the chances are I would have made more friends. In my case I could do nothing to impress others.

So while it is not easy and does require patience and dedication, it's worth considering pushing your child to develop a creative skill to a high degree of aptitude. Even if you think that is not where your child's talents lie, it will probably help them. Even people who pursue academic or intellectual careers still need friends.

I started socializing in art and music programs with kids who liked art and music, it's the art and music context that made it easier to socialize in these programs instead of playground.

Please drop the aspie from the title... ALL children should be taught the arts

Yeah, you'd have been a regular Howard Wallowitz.

In Elementary school, I was a class clown comedian, until I realized that making people laugh at me was not doing a thing to make them want to be my friend.

In Junior High and High School, I was a comic-art nerd and drew obsessively. I suppose in some ways, it was a stim, because it was the only thing that kept me centered enough to pay attention to what the teachers were saying and kept me from nervously rocking or constantly fidgeting. Those skills got me passing curious attention from time to time, but did nothing to aid me in making social connections. I drew and painted a lot of portraits and caricatures, but it never got me a date.

At 15, I became a radio DJ and made my living for 30 years doing stand-up material in a closed room and answering a request line. Those abilities got me laid more than your average Aspie, but didn't make me any better at creating stable relationships or lasting human connections.

Now don't get me wrong, I'm not saying creative skills are not useful - just that our social shortcomings are not alleviated in the slightest by the ability to do tricks.

Truth is, my most lasting friendships have always been with other social misfit geeks who happened to share one or more of my personal obsessive interests.

What falls in the category of creative skills?

From my own experience I believe there's a lot to be said for this. When I was having a rough time in school every day, the one thing that got the bullies to stop bullying me was when they happened to hear me and a friend behind a wall, singing a song we'd worked out pretty harmonies for. Suddenly everyone who had bullied me in school dropped it or actually became nice to me. It was an accidental thing but worked like a charm, I discovered.

I was academically very bright but was bullied for that. I was excruciatingly shy and withdrawn and was bullied for that.
I also had creative talents in creative writing, art, and also music. I loved to sing, and one day I got the only best friend I had to sing the main part of a song while I sang harmony, and we had fun singing this. We never meant for anyone else to hear it, but we were practicing behind a corner wall at breaktime in school, some of my bullies heard it, and instead of giving me a hard time, they actually listened and were impressed, and from that point on life got a lot better for me in school. I've always looked upon that as the big turning point regarding the bullying.

I think it's fairly true in life that if you can do something that gives people a little bit of fun, pleasure, a moment to dream, a moment to laugh, or a moment to be moved -- which the arts all achieve in an audience -- people seem much more willing to give you a pass, brownie points, let you off the hook, admire you, or whatever. I think the key is to move or transport someone's mind or emotions.

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That was my immediate reaction

Too many things to list.

There are thousands of creative skills a person can learn but I would personally strongly urge parents of Aspies to choose to teach their kid one revolved around performance. Anything that gets people to go, "Wow."

You're ~30, not dead. Pick a creative skill and go practice it. Then master it if you like. Use it as productive creative alone time to unwind and just sort of withdraw into your own right brained world for a while, or use it to meet others in a more social setting - or both.

I never mastered any particular creative art, but I have been creative over the years. I prefer purpose & function driven creativity, fusing art & engineering to create things - especially when they're good looking functional gifts for others I care about. So, every once in a while when I get an idea or inspiration for something, I'll work away on it, learn new skills along the way if I have to, and create something beautiful. Sometimes it's as simple as a set of toy building blocks, others it's much more complex. I have so many ideas for future projects from jewellery to architecture it's not even funny. I'll get a chance to pursue several more of them over the years, and who knows, maybe even all of them if time & money allow.

But what about all the many artists we have here on WP? They don't seem more socially accepted than the rest of us...?

This

Aside from just social interaction and points of common interest, being a creative individual gives children a leg up in problem solving and abstract thinking, something useful in pretty much every field of work and life in general.

I am so thankful that I was raised in a house full of painters, sculptors, dancers, actors and musicians. Even though I'm a scientist I came to love these facets of creativity and consider myself more whole for having taken part in them.

1) How do you know?
2) Speak for yourself...

My art leads to a lot of social interaction and i am quite popular...

I don't know where the hell you come off with thinking that Aspies kids can improve there social outlook through art and creativity but I think that a bunch of effin BS. I know. Been there, done that. I was one of those aspies who tried to be social through art and creativity and all I got was ridiculed for it. I wished I had never pursued any kind of art in school because all I ever got for it was hurt felling and a broken heart. Hell even my own f***ing mother told me that some of my art stuff was ret*d. all that pursuing art and creativity did for me was make things worse.

Now that I am grown up and older now. pursuing art and creativity has been a wonderful experience for me but the scars of the pass still linger.

Children should be encouraged into the arts, not pushed and if they don't like it then they should be left alone. Not everyone can be successful in the arts just like not everyone can be successful in academics. I tried to learn bass guitar but it didn't seem to work for my attention span.

I've always been artistic and did it make me more friends? No. Recently it's made it easier to make friends with bands as I can always break the ice with them over talking about my photography, but there were still many periods of loneliness.

I know this sounds like a great idea to you but it won't benefit everybody. And a high school student doing juggling or magic tricks would be teased for it. Even bullied.

The best thing to do is learn social skills and find a group (or just one) of accepting people. But those who are different will always find it harder to fit in.

Winner, they won't be real friends. I've known many people who just liked me for my photography. They even told people we were best friends when we were just acquaintances. They didn't even offer me a place to sleep when I was stranded in a town I was shooting a band at.
I've felt lonely over the fact people just liked me for my photography.

Umm... I am not sure who you are addressing... but I will sat this... "I don't know where the hell you get off" assuming that you experience will be the only possible outcome of any endeavor...

I am sorry that it led to ridicule in YOUR life... but it was YOUR life and NOT MY life or someone else's life... so "I don't know where the hell you get off" telling us that we are wrong on this... because I was one of those aspies that found a sense of belonging and community through my art... which runs completely contrary to your experience, I know...

For the record...I have no problems with your account or that you feel that way... but "I don't know where the hell you get off" using a phrase as confrontational and dismissive to another's experiences and opinion as "I don't know where the hell you get off"...

Idk about teaching a kid parlor tricks to win friends. Arts are a thing to teach all kids of course and I was taught them as far as drawing painting and sculpting and stuff. Most of the ASD kids in was in special ed with and def myself - had motor skills problems. I asked for a magic kit when I was 10 and then had a meltdown because I could not do most of the tricks correctly. I would like to learn the guitar and will prob try but I do not think I will have the dexterity to do it. Like a lot of ppl with asd I am a perfectionist. What I am saying is trying to teach an asd kid to juggle to make friends may just lead to him feeling worse about himself.