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jetbuilder
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03 Jan 2014, 1:18 pm

Found a link on Facebook to an interesting blog post this morning. Thought I'd share it here.
http://musingsofanaspie.com/2013/07/24/ ... propriate/


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SteelMaiden
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03 Jan 2014, 1:36 pm

I stim in public a lot because leaving my house is often stressful.


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03 Jan 2014, 5:09 pm

As a parent of a child with AS I found this an interesting read. My son's only 4 so it's not often that his stimming behaviours raise too many eyebrows - most kids his age are spinning and throwing themselves everywhere anyway. He also wouldn't be bothered/notice, at the moment, if people were staring, laughing or commenting about it.
I do worry about when he is older though as some people won't just stare - they will likely bully him. And even if the stimming isn't bothering him that will.
I don't think you can compare it to people signing in public or using a wheelchair as they have an obvious disability and MOST people draw the line at mocking people with visible disabilities.
If it's possible to replace a stim that looks unusual for something less obvious or find other ways to reduce anxiety then I can see why some may think it a good option. Though obviously it would be better if people were more educated/tolerant/not a**holes.



League_Girl
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03 Jan 2014, 5:19 pm

I'm actually the one embarrassed if I do it in public. I am talking about things like rocking. At least foot tapping or leg bouncing is normal so I can get away with that and pacing too so it's no so embarrassing. But I have always been self conscious about myself around others and it would always embarrass me if anyone pointed out my quirks. I would deny it or say I didn't know when they would ask me why.


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03 Jan 2014, 6:01 pm

I think it would be wise to put the authors ideas into context. Here is a person who is obviously upset by a perception that the world is unjust towards people who are autistic. The author may have had experiences where he was made fun of or bullied due to his or her stimming.

While I'm sure we all can relate to the uneasiness we have surrounding how we are perceived remember it's just that; our perception of how we are perceived.

I stim a lot. At home, in public, in private, around people I know, and around people I don't know. It's an automated response. It's soothing and comforting for me. I rock, I play with my fingers, I tug at clothing, etc. when I do notice someone staring I normally keep going. I've had bad experiences, but I refuse to allow a few bad experiences stop me from keeping myself calm. If the people staring thinks I am a freak, well they just aren't as empathetic as they think they are. If they want to point and laugh, well someone didn't learn manners. If they want to gossip, well they must lead boring lives if they find my behavior interesting enough to talk about. If they want to make fun and bully me, well have at it just let me exit and they won't find out why I rock in the first place.

It's really all about perception and how you choose to view it, because that becomes your reality. :lol: I choose the perception that people will stare at anything for any reason, it's probably because I have a boggie hanging out.



Marybird
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03 Jan 2014, 6:49 pm

Many years ago, when I was on a bus coming home from school, I noticed some young people sitting across from me were laughing and staring at my hands which were doing that 'playing the piano in the air thing'. I didn't know I was doing anything unusual or that it had anything to do with autism. It seemed perfectly normal to me so I didn't get embarrassed. I still feel the same way. It's no big deal.
Now I just find that kind of automatic repetitive behavior incredibly interesting and would like to know the neurology behind it, but still, it's no big deal. I don't see it as something to stop or get embarrassed over.



jetbuilder
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03 Jan 2014, 10:58 pm

I have never really noticed anyone commenting on, or pointing out anything I do as weird, or I just don't hear\ see them. That may be because most of things I do are relatively subtle. I rapidly tap my fingertips to my thumb, usually when walking. When I was young, I used to walk on my toes all the time, and I never heard anyone comment on it. Any time I can get my hands on any small and interesting object, I'll have fun just playing around with it. Lately I've caught myself rocking when I go to lunch every day. (I've been doing this much more lately) I don't particularly care what random people think about it. It feels good.


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Standing on the fringes of life... offers a unique perspective. But there comes a time to see what it looks like from the dance floor.
---- Stephen Chbosky
ASD Diagnosis on 7-17-14
My Tumblr: http://jetbuilder.tumblr.com/


FishStickNick
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04 Jan 2014, 1:14 am

I get the occasional comment on how fidgety I am, but I don't get ridiculed for stimming. And really, I don't care. The one thing I do, though, is I try to tone the stimming down if I'm sitting right next to someone (say, on the bus); my mom would get on my case about that.



EzraS
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04 Jan 2014, 2:02 am

I'm 13 but i'm only 4'10" so i still look like a little kid.
but I am getting to the age where my stimming is standing out more



Stripeycat
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04 Jan 2014, 8:32 am

League_Girl wrote:
I'm actually the one embarrassed if I do it in public. I am talking about things like rocking. At least foot tapping or leg bouncing is normal so I can get away with that and pacing too so it's no so embarrassing. But I have always been self conscious about myself around others and it would always embarrass me if anyone pointed out my quirks. I would deny it or say I didn't know when they would ask me why.


I'm self-conscious about my stims too. Before my diagnosis I tried to stop myself doing obvious stims even when I was on my own. Since my diagnosis I've started to get more comfortable about stimming, and these days I'll happily rock, grunt and bounce when I don't think anyone can see or hear.

But since I started rocking in front of my family my mum has commented on it a few times, like asking my why I'm doing it, and it makes me so uncomfortable I don't want to talk about it. She says she dislikes it but that it's her problem not mine. I don't know why it's such a big deal for either of us. Perhaps we've both been brought up to think that unusual behaviour like rocking is a sign there's something wrong with the person doing it.

When I'm around people from outside my family I feel really uncomfortable doing obvious stims. But like the author of the blog post says, if you suppress one stim another one will pop up somewhere, so I'm always fidgeting. Sometimes I go to a public toilet to have a rock. It makes me sad that I feel I have to hide behaviour that is normal and natural for us autists.



Davie333
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04 Jan 2014, 8:52 am

Is there a list somewhere that points out all the different stimms cos I dont really know what it is.
I can never seem to be ble to stop moving my feet is that stimming ?
Sometimes when Im in public It feels like there is too much light and I can't stop blinking like imstaring at the sun is that stimming , what aabout randow jibberish playing on your mind all day long is that stimming ?

whackamole indeed. Do we need to embrace our repetative nature more and let it out?
one day when im surrounded by strangers and some music starts playing Im going to DANCE!



Stripeycat
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05 Jan 2014, 1:48 pm

Quote:
Is there a list somewhere that points out all the different stimms cos I dont really know what it is.

I don't think it's possible to create a definitive list of stims because people probably keep inventing new ones. But I think this blog post gives a useful explanation and lots of examples: http://chaoticidealism.livejournal.com/83950.html

Quote:
I can never seem to be ble to stop moving my feet is that stimming ?

It sounds like stimming to me.

Quote:
Sometimes when Im in public It feels like there is too much light and I can't stop blinking like imstaring at the sun is that stimming

I'm not sure if I'd call that stimming or just a reaction to bright light.

Quote:
what aabout randow jibberish playing on your mind all day long is that stimming ?

If the thoughts are repetitive and comforting, in my opinion that could be a stim.