My lack of social skills makes me want to die

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It's not actually so much my lack of social skills, rather that my lack of social skills means I get used and taken advantage of. I am at the stage when I know I cannot talk to people I do not know, I struggle to talk to people I do know, so I do not try to make friends any more. I would not know how. I always say the wrong thing - sooner or later! I have no friends. I live alone with my dog and cat.

It's not even so much that I would kill myself. More, if I was to die I would be happy.

Anyone else feel like me?

Short answer? Yes. Me.

Longer answer, this question seems to come up a lot. I know I have the same problem - I'm stuck in this trap where to learn more social skills I need to practice, but when I practice I either get used or get deliberately and painfully ostracised.

I live alone, and have few people I would call a friend, none locally.

It's led to massive social anxiety and a depression problem and yes, thoughts of suicide are omnipresent, and I have an suicide plan I could implement quite quickly. I'm living day to day now, waiting for the next major suicide trigger.

I would love another solution.

You are not alone.

Ironically, last time I felt properly suicidal I had ordered some clothes from a catalogue I did not want, so I decided to take them to the post office to send them back, and on the way back pick up a whole bunch of painkillers from every chemist I passed haha The irony is that If I was dead, it would not matter if the clothes got returned. But that was the logic in my head at that time. Quite funny really.

Chuckle.

Yes, when you are feeling like that, executive function is often not a strong point, is it?

I suppose it would matter to someone else, though, someone left behind.

But when you are down you don't think like that... My family is not that close anymore anyway

True.

I'm not what you would call close to my family either.

I suppose the question for both of us (and not a few others around here) is what to do about the isolation and suicidal ideation, but I have no simple answers to that. I simply can't handle being around NTs for more than a couple of hours at a time. Part of me wants to find a couple of acres somewhere and take up permaculture, and get away from the NTs that way, but that is light years beyond my budget.

Yes, I do feel like it's that or suicide.

This was posted less than an hour ago. Something like what you feel is not uncommon.
http://www.wrongplanet.net/postt250322.html

I do live with my family, but it feels like I'm drifting further and further away from them. I'm fighting everyday just to keep myself connected to those few people that I know outside the family. I would really like to find a way to increase my social skills so that I don't have to feel like this anymore.

Speaking from bitter experience, I suggest you try to keep friends and family close. You can't afford to lose friends when making more is so difficult.

Social skills development, especially among those of us diagnosed as adults, is one of the more fraught subjects of discussion around here. As far as I can make out, it's possible to learn to avoid making some of the gross social errors, but failure to recognise much nonverbal communication, make proper eye contact, follow conversation flow and so on is always going to be difficult. Reading books on noverbal communication can only help so far.

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