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thinkinginpictures
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12 Feb 2014, 3:01 am

"Stop being a victim"

That's the most used sentence I hear on the internet.

Being a victim of a crime is the only victim that doesn't get shunned upon, yet.

Everyone else who are victims of some sort or the other, be it victim of abuse (legal abuse, such as being spanked as a child), or victim of an illness or
victim of the unfair government decisions, are being shunned upon. The very word "victimization" has a negative connotation these days.

I think we are on a VERY dangerous path here. Because if you can't excuse yourself from duties, because of illness, what else have you left back?
It's not one's fault to fall ill!

Examples of victims getting shunned at:

* Tibet
* Peaceful activists getting arrested for peacefully protesting.
* People in favor of government welfare.
* Conscientious Objectors.
* The sick and/or disabled, mostly those mentally ill or mentally handicapped.



beneficii
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12 Feb 2014, 3:12 am

It's a way to disregard the elephants in the room by guilt-tripping those affected.


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zer0netgain
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12 Feb 2014, 7:35 am

We live in a society (USA) where if your life isn't how you wish it to be or if something bad happens to you, you are a "victim" of someone else's bad act.

Sometimes this is true, but in most every situation, the "victim" bears some of the blame. Sometimes, the "victim" is to blame for their own mess.

Like anything else, when you throw it about too liberally, it becomes meaningless.

To tell someone they are a "victim" so they can blame someone else rather than do some painful self-reflection is not only not helping them, but it degrades the status of "victim" for those who legitimately are victims.



Fnord
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12 Feb 2014, 8:51 am

It would be better (imo) if certain people would stop playing the victim -- people who, for whatever reason, seem to think that every conversation, every relationship, and every aspect of their lives simply must center on their victimhood.

True, there are some traumatic experiences that may keep a person firmly rooted in one emotional state, forcing them to relive, over and over, the memories of that trauma; also, there are some traumas that leave a person mentally or physically disabled -- these people are not just "playing the victim", since they are REAL victims.

For example, some people who "Play the Victim" may start every conversation with "I can never get a date" or "No one will give me a job", and then ignore every attempt to advise them on how they can make themselves more attractive or employable.

Another example might be a person who provokes others into attacking them so that they can play the victim and complain about being attacked (i.e., Internet Trolls).

Everyone is a victim of something ("You are still a victim of the accident you lead / Sure as I'm a victim of desire!" -- Billy Joel), so why should anybody want to present themselves as "More Victimly Than Thou"?



MegaBass
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12 Feb 2014, 9:03 am

thinkinginpictures wrote:
* People in favor of government welfare.


Notice how the people who spite them manage to victimize themselves? "I work full time and have to support my etc. while all these scum are living off the taxes I pay. I work so hard oh woe me".

Ironic?



thinkinginpictures
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12 Feb 2014, 2:04 pm

MegaBass wrote:
thinkinginpictures wrote:
* People in favor of government welfare.


Notice how the people who spite them manage to victimize themselves? "I work full time and have to support my etc. while all these scum are living off the taxes I pay. I work so hard oh woe me".

Ironic?


Even worse, they claim that that they are not shunning at the victims, they are merely "re-defining" victims.
Being the ones who claim that being the strongest/fittest should grant them better political privileges (such as the right to vote) than those who cannot provide for themselves and have to rely on
government welfare, who in turn should be stripped off their basic civil rights, such as voting in liberal democracies.

These same people also claim the restricting the right to vote for the welfare recipients, makes a society more liberal/free.

What happens in reality is that a lot of people are banned from entering politics, and a lot of people have to work under henious conditions in work/poor houses.

These same people who proclaim their ideal goal is "liberty" are nothing, but hypocrites!



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12 Feb 2014, 2:50 pm

I have noticed this too and I think it means "take responsibility and do something about it." I have also heard "playing the victim" and to me it means someone does something wrong and refuses to take responsibility about their consequence.

Like my husband suffers from pain, people may say he is being the victim meaning he isn't doing anything to fix it or to make his situation better so when they say "he needs to stop being the victim here" they mean he needs to do something about his pain, go get on insurance and go to a doctor, go to a pain clinic.


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adb
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12 Feb 2014, 3:22 pm

Whiners are being shunned, not victims. Whether you're a victim or not, whining about your disadvantages doesn't generate sympathy.



thinkinginpictures
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12 Feb 2014, 4:17 pm

adb wrote:
Whiners are being shunned, not victims. Whether you're a victim or not, whining about your disadvantages doesn't generate sympathy.


This comment clearly illustrates my post. Thank you for providing an example.

It's EXACTLY this: "Whining about your disadvantages doesn't generate sympathy".

It should!



LKL
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12 Feb 2014, 5:33 pm

whether a person is 'reporting an adverse event,' or 'whining,' appears to be in the eye of the beholder.



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12 Feb 2014, 5:43 pm

LKL wrote:
whether a person is 'reporting an adverse event,' or 'whining,' appears to be in the eye of the beholder.

Why someone would go looking for the semantics of a phrase in one of the ocular appendages of an aberration that shoots disintegrate and death rays just by looking at you is beyond me... :scratch:



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12 Feb 2014, 5:48 pm

LKL wrote:
whether a person is 'reporting an adverse event,' or 'whining,' appears to be in the eye of the beholder.


For the most part, yes. But there are some people who go beyond "reporting an adverse event" to "never shutting up about an adverse event."


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12 Feb 2014, 6:05 pm

It's not victim-hood per se, it's a certain helpless negativity from people who not only claim that all their problems are the fault of being victimized, but that they are themselves powerless to do anything about it that is off-putting. No one likes to listen to someone who does nothing but complain and won't even try to make things better.


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12 Feb 2014, 6:43 pm

MegaBass wrote:
thinkinginpictures wrote:
* People in favor of government welfare.


Notice how the people who spite them manage to victimize themselves? "I work full time and have to support my etc. while all these scum are living off the taxes I pay. I work so hard oh woe me".

Ironic?


This.


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beneficii
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12 Feb 2014, 6:45 pm

adb wrote:
Whiners are being shunned, not victims. Whether you're a victim or not, whining about your disadvantages doesn't generate sympathy.


Instead, you are supposed to shut up about any problems that you have, that social and other factors may be contributing to, take them all upon yourself, and let the privileged live a guilt-free life and ignore the elephants in the room.

If you end up being further victimized, then well that is just YOUR fault and no one else's.


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12 Feb 2014, 6:46 pm

League_Girl wrote:
I have noticed this too and I think it means "take responsibility and do something about it." I have also heard "playing the victim" and to me it means someone does something wrong and refuses to take responsibility about their consequence.

Like my husband suffers from pain, people may say he is being the victim meaning he isn't doing anything to fix it or to make his situation better so when they say "he needs to stop being the victim here" they mean he needs to do something about his pain, go get on insurance and go to a doctor, go to a pain clinic.


It's highly abused, though.


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