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TungleVatn
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Joined: 24 Apr 2014
Age: 31
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Location: Indiana

16 May 2014, 12:34 am

Sometimes I feel like I probably have trouble processing information. Either that or I'm not that good at choosing words wisely. Sometimes I end up saying things that don't make any sense and I have to rephrase statements. I wonder a lot if my replies to people's posts on WP are relevant or what the poster was looking for. I wonder if I've made any sense at all to anyone. This seems to happen more when I'm not face to face with someone.

Sometimes I even think it wouldn't be the end of the world if I shared something and turns out it was the worst thing I could have said. Example- when I used to eat drugs my back would hurt after a while and it got to the point someone had to give me a massage so I just gave it up. One night it started again so my friend took me out of the room we were in and started to work on my back. Only this time it just made it worse and I stopped her. She suggested I go to a massage place and I said I'm not comfortable going to those places. She asked me why and I said last time I went it wasn't really a massage place so I left, only I phrased it differently. Before I could even finish my sentence she makes an extremely uncomfortable facial expression tells me about some other place that was legit and walked out of the room. I started to go back upstairs while looking where she walked to and the next room was full of people. They were listening to us. The night just wasn't the same after that. I remember thinking 'should've just said 'because I said so'.. Looking back on that now I see how that was very inappropriate. I'm just learning every day.

People say you shouldn't second guess yourself but why wouldn't I? That's what happens when I don't second guess myself. It takes practice to learn social ways but it just gets to me. I'll have to learn to just say oh well eff it and try not to beat myself up over it for the rest of the week.I don't think I'll have another one to that degree again, but there will be more. There always is.
It shocked my friends but I was way more bothered by it. It probably stems from the gut wrenching hateful reactions from others I experienced as a kid when I never made sense. Does anyone else have trouble trying not to cross lines? Do you sometimes wonder if what you're saying makes any sense?



Dreycrux
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16 May 2014, 1:12 am

What drugs were you" eating"?


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eggheadjr
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16 May 2014, 2:51 pm

We use language differently - it's a component of autism.

In my case I am often misunderstood as a result - especially if people read more into things that what I had been trying to stay.

An example:

My boss told me of an idea that someone had and I replied - that's a dumb idea, who had that idea? He replied that it was his idea and the room went silent. I replied - well it's still a dumb idea - and he just laughed.

He laughed because he understood because of my autism all I was trying to say was that I didn't think the idea was very good. I was certainly NOT implying that he was stupid. Others might have thought I was trying to insult my boss.

This really happened and I had the situation explained to me after, that what I had said could have been taken "another way".

People on the autism spectrum are often accused of being blunt / rude / inconsiderate / etc when really we are not trying to be.

It's just that we use language differently - we tend to be very literal, almost concrete in our language.

Based on what you outlined in your posting, I believe this is what happend to you in the situation.

Happens to me all the time, and to others here as well. Part of who we are.


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