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bumble
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12 Jun 2014, 9:09 am

Do you ever break things in temper?

I just threw my mobile phone across the room. Yet another text message from macro or whatever they are called. Every time it goes off I think it might be a message from someone who wants to meet up....I got frustrated and chucked the phone across the room.

I have no choice now but to resort to hiring someone for sexual release. I can't find a male on any of the dating sites who just wants to meet up regularly for sexy fun without all the chit chat. I keep getting endless complaints about my not talking enough. I am tired and can't keep thinking of things to say. I just want someone I can sit quietly with and where I don't have to keep talking unless I actually have something in my head to talk about. I have decided a male escort would fit the bill so to speak as as sad as it seems it really does save me from having to play this endless social dance whilst never getting what I am looking for...

It's not about casual sex with strangers...ideally I wanted an ongoing passionate love affair with the same person, someone I am bonded with but that is not going to happen for me.

I want someone I can sit quietly with and enjoy a film or similar together...all people do is talk, endlessly talk talk talk talk.

I can't stand it anymore...the talking.....I cant stand it, they never shut up and DO anything interesting. It's just endless pointless gasbagging.



kraftiekortie
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12 Jun 2014, 9:13 am

Seriously....if I wasn't married, I might just travel to East of England just to watch a movie with you. I'm not a gabber.

You should use your energy to be Paleolithic--in the sense of creating stone tools.



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12 Jun 2014, 9:15 am

Your ideal partnership almost sounds exactly like mine.

I love it when I can hug my friends, without talking, that's the best. I love pressing myself up against them in bed, but only one really lets me LOL. >.>

None of them are gay, and with my intense lack social skills/interest, it's going to be hard finding someone who is.

EDIT - I should say that at times when I was very young, I would break stuff. After that, I would develop attachments to everything (such as plates/tulips) and cry if they were destroyed somehow. Now, it still pains me, as if I have lost a 'part' of me/my house when something like that happens. IT is the reason I tend to hoard/protect all of my stuff. By nature, I tend to want to preserve all my belongings/memories etc.

One of my most painful memories (doesn't really feel painful now, but it is something random I remember really, really well) is from a TV show that I just so happened to watch five minutes of at my grandparents house. An old lady was robbed and one of the robbers snatched her perfume bottle, and she made a really sort of helpless/worried gasp sound, and then the perfume smashed on the floor. Probably the strongest empathy I have ever had (if you would call it that).


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KB8CWB
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12 Jun 2014, 12:32 pm

bumble wrote:
Do you ever break things in temper?

I just threw my mobile phone across the room. Yet another text message from macro or whatever they are called. Every time it goes off I think it might be a message from someone who wants to meet up....I got frustrated and chucked the phone across the room.

I have no choice now but to resort to hiring someone for sexual release. I can't find a male on any of the dating sites who just wants to meet up regularly for sexy fun without all the chit chat. I keep getting endless complaints about my not talking enough. I am tired and can't keep thinking of things to say. I just want someone I can sit quietly with and where I don't have to keep talking unless I actually have something in my head to talk about. I have decided a male escort would fit the bill so to speak as as sad as it seems it really does save me from having to play this endless social dance whilst never getting what I am looking for...

It's not about casual sex with strangers...ideally I wanted an ongoing passionate love affair with the same person, someone I am bonded with but that is not going to happen for me.

I want someone I can sit quietly with and enjoy a film or similar together...all people do is talk, endlessly talk talk talk talk.

I can't stand it anymore...the talking.....I cant stand it, they never shut up and DO anything interesting. It's just endless pointless gasbagging.


OMG!! ! You sound like the female version of me!! I mean I don't mind talking some about something meaningful, but to just go on and on about nothing is freaking annoying. Plus when I am trying to do something, or catch a movie or show its like watch the damn tele. I could NEVER watch a program and actually see it for all the nonsensical chatter! :wall:

WTH is wrong with just cuddling and watching the movie (quietly)? Must their gums be flapping incessantly whilst the show is on. At least wait for the damn commercial. Or like when I am working on restoring a radio. For freaking sakes be quiet, I have my hands in anywhere from 300 vdc to sometimes 2400vdc or higher. So sneak up behind and mess with me and/or talk out of the blue after sneaking up? Got nailed by the electric on MANY occasions that way. Then they get all pissy and act like I mortally wounded them.

Easier to stay single and alone! But I really do hear what you are saying. I RARELY will talk unless I have something to say. I HATE unnecessary chatter. Also all the drama they tend to bring but that is another freaking matter entirely.

I have thought about hiring someone but scared to catch something from them I don't want. Plus ideally I would rather have feelings about someone as well.

Sorry for the rant but this really hit home for me! :twisted:

Edit: Oh yea I've been known to break things. My glasses on more then one occasion tossing em at a wall, tools, etc. grrrr



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12 Jun 2014, 12:50 pm

Only thing I ever damaged in a rage was a wall, left a heel-sized cracked indent in the drywall. I'm used to kicking things that hold up when I'm angry, such as my solid wooden bed post, I was surprised when I saw I'd put a hole in the wall. My aspie dad once smashed his phone against a wall... in the middle of a Barnes and Noble. I forget what he was mad about now, and that was before I knew either of us had Asperger's, but looking back at it now, it almost feels bonding in a strange sort of way.

As for people who talk all the time, they drive me crazy too. I've never been in a relationship, and I'm not sure I want one: all the touching and texting and borrowing his clothes and being forced to hang out even when you don't want to as a show of your affection sounds incredibly annoying and pointless. I have one friend who calls me frequently, and nine times out of ten I don't pick up the phone because I don't feel like talking.


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KB8CWB
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12 Jun 2014, 12:58 pm

This is one of the reasons I quit watching the telly years ago, piss poor programming on it didn't help either. Started watching again 2 years ago as I got netflix. Yes some older programs but many I could never watch because of being annoyed when they first played. Was in relationship then. I still get bugged (my 86 year old mum who has needs and I am understanding) but netflix is AWESOME as I can stop it and go back later. To me you miss one scene and I can't "fill in the blanks". Many shows after that I have lost the plot or what is happening and lose interest. I now have satellite on my laptop as well however I can't pause that. :shrug: But being disturbed RARELY happens now and if my mom needs something, she texts me. Both of us hate talking on the phone but we both text. Yes I corrupted an 86 year old she texts and finally 3 months ago I got her a smartphone. She now has and android and loves it. Keeps her amused and out of my hair as she is playing solitaire on it or some other game, etc. :twisted:



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12 Jun 2014, 1:39 pm

My kitchen floor looks like a crater and I smashed a copper pan, so the copper and the steel split from each other. As a teen and a young adult I have damaged a couple of doors and made the plaster fall off the walls, and as a small kid I attacked things that irritated me, - if I had hit my foot on a chair, the chair got licked. I went berserk.
I still tend to get aggressive with things, that, say, are too much in my way when I hoover. :evil:


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Sweetleaf
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12 Jun 2014, 2:45 pm

Yes I have broken things and hit inanimate objects when angry more than once, my brother broke his phone by throwing it across the room....because he was in a bad mood and thought I was trying to guilt trip him for being in a bad mood of course I had no intention of that but I take stuff personally too sometimes. So yeah both of us have done that sort of thing, I've gotten bloody knuckles a couple times from hitting walls or what not but my brother's had that more. Luckily I've only broken my own things aside from the little hole in the wall near my current room and back when I was around 16 I got home from school when we lived somewhere else and the doors where locked and I was frusterated about not being able to get in and ended up hitting the window without thinking and ended up doing so hard enough to break it and cut my hand on glass.

I suppose I'd rather break/hit something inanimate than a living thing...oh and I broke a picture by throwing an umbrella across the room because my moms boyfriend was being stingy about letting me borrow it to go on a quick walk when it was likely to rain out and he's the only one who had any at that point.


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12 Jun 2014, 3:15 pm

I have to break things occasionally, it is the only release for a certain kind of frustrated, overwhelmed emotion that comes on sometimes. But not, as the OP seems to be saying, in relation to sexual frustration. Which I happen to be feeling a lot of at this moment. But it would never lead to breaking things. At least, it hasn't so far.

I did learn a long time ago to steer my need to smash in such a way that I almost always take it out on something that is valueless, and also out of the presence of everyone. Even pets. Once I scared my dog so bad that she ran under the fence into a field to get away, and I was in no way venting my rage in her direction. After that I made sure not to do it around animals. But really, there is nothing like a good, harmless, private smashing of some junk when the need arises.



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12 Jun 2014, 3:26 pm

I have a few big dents in my bedroom door where I kicked it in a temper. I always think that's the best thing to kick because it's hollow wood so it doesn't hurt so much like it would kicking a brick wall. It's pretty embarrassing, because if people ever come round and go into my room they might see these marks and think of me as somebody with severe anger problems or something (luckily I don't have many guests round to see me). I really ought to paint the whole door over so it would cover up all the marks. Now that I've gone on meds, I feel much less angry so objects are more safe now. :lol:

I remember when I was about 9 I slammed the back door so hard (in one of those sulky tempers I used to get), that it made a big crack in the glass. My mum wasn't very pleased with me for doing that. I didn't intend to break the glass like that. I just used to get all sulky about something trivial and want attention and sympathy, and so would go round slamming doors. I was just a kid then though. Now I kick or slam doors when I'm angry with myself and just need to get it out.

I just wish there was a field that was miles away from anybody, and I can just scream and jump up and down as much and as loud as I can, without anybody being anywhere near enough to hear or see me. That is want I wanted to do when I got really overwhelmed with my emotions (depression and anger was a dangerous mix). It would also be good to be in a junk yard and could smash things up until I have calmed down. That way I would not be upsetting anybody or breaking anybody's possessions and nobody would mistake me for some crazy person.


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12 Jun 2014, 3:34 pm

I'm with you on this one. I'm eternally frustrated by constantly be expected to jibber jabber excessively. Sitting in silence is overrated. There's quite enough hot air being blown around this planet, as it is.



Jensen
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12 Jun 2014, 3:47 pm

Are we more temperamental/aggressive than most people?


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chris5000
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12 Jun 2014, 4:41 pm

I do it all the time if I let myself get frustrated enough

just the other day I threw a 150 pound doka shore almost 30 feet because it was jammed up so bad that it would not extend even after beating on the foot with a 20lb hammer for almost 15 minutes
its not even something I think about before doing it just happens in the spur of the moment



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12 Jun 2014, 5:18 pm

I'm prone to throwing or whacking things when I get upset, but somehow I usually stop short of breaking them. I have broken my fair share of phones though.

Bumble I hope you meet your ideal mate.



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12 Jun 2014, 7:16 pm

I have in the past, but it takes a lot to make me lose my temper to that point.

The last time I remember breaking something out of anger was when I was in college a few years ago and I needed to print an assignment. There was something weird going on with my printer, and it was showing over 1,000 print jobs waiting. Every time I clicked to remove one, another one popped up. I tried to remember how to quit them all at once, but I couldn't find it, and I couldn't think straight to remember, because I was already frustrated. The frustration of not being able to find where to quit everything at once made me even more mad. Eventually, I got so mad that I banged my fists on the slide-out keyboard tray on my desk and broke one side of it. (It's particle board, and the screw popped right out of the particle board). I had to borrow my father's drill to fix it, and my brother asked me what happened. When I told him, he started making fun of me, which made me mad all over again. (I wanted to slap him in the face).


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bumble
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13 Jun 2014, 12:57 am

dianthus wrote:
I'm prone to throwing or whacking things when I get upset, but somehow I usually stop short of breaking them. I have broken my fair share of phones though.

Bumble I hope you meet your ideal mate.


I am wondering if pursing a mate is doing my mental health more harm than good. Maybe I should stop. I don't cope with relationships when I find them anyway. It's too difficult to keep up with all the social expectations.