Feel like I'm not allowed to have emotions

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Joe90
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04 Jul 2014, 2:08 pm

My mum seems to dislike me having emotions. Well, she is comforting when I'm specifically upset (as in crying) about something and would give me a cuddle and talk to me about it, but other types of emotions I feel I'm not allowed to have.

I have been on Sertraline for over 2 months now and yes they are working and are making negative emotions like anger and depression under control more, and so I am not having rage outbursts or getting too depressed about life. But I still do have emotions, like getting in a mood about something or just going withdrawn. I see nothing wrong in that, as it doesn't cause upset for other people around me. But now that I'm on tablets, I feel like close relatives are like monitoring me, like if I complain about something or just seem a bit quiet or upset, they're like ''I thought those tablets were working?'' So I feel like I've got to go around completely calm and happy all the time like a robot or something.

Does this happen to anyone else? It seems to be OK for other people to feel irritable and I've got to respect that, but if I show any sign of negative emotion I get criticised.


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Girlwithaspergers
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04 Jul 2014, 2:58 pm

My parents always hate it and get mad when I am upset.


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lostonearth35
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04 Jul 2014, 4:02 pm

My mother likes it when I'm feeling positive emotions. If my mother had her way I'd always be happy, happy, freakin' Pollyanna happy, and never sad, angry or upset because that makes her upset. But we both know that's not ever going to happen. I will be sad, angry or upset because that's what makes me a human being. What should I say, sorry I wasn't born an insect or something?



Norny
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05 Jul 2014, 4:37 am

I'm fine with others feeling negative emotions, unless they start raging at me or extensively drain my energy for what I perceive to be poor reasons.

For example, if my sister were to break a plate, and become upset as a result that's understandable. If I walk out of my room and ask her a question after that happens and she yells 'F*ck off' or something then it really bothers me.


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mr_bigmouth_502
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05 Jul 2014, 5:02 am

I often feel like other people downplay my emotions and don't take me seriously whenever I'm in a negative mood. Then again, I am somewhat known for my mopiness and tendency to complain about trivial things. On the one hand it's kind of a good thing because when I tell people to screw off they don't take it so personally, but on the other hand it really sucks when I have something that's really bothering me, and I want to let someone else know about it.



cavernio
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05 Jul 2014, 5:52 am

Joe90 wrote:
But I still do have emotions, like getting in a mood about something or just going withdrawn. I see nothing wrong in that, as it doesn't cause upset for other people around me.

It probably does cause upset for others around you. It's not pleasant to be hanging around with someone who's in a funk, at all. At least, that's my experience from being around my sister when she's in mood. I guess it depends on how connected I feel to someone as to how I'll react to their bad mood.
Also, I don't think most mentally healthy people 'get in moods' or 'just get withdrawn' on any regular basis, but what do I know? They'll get upset about events, and then they'll get over it or solve the issue. I get the impression from your wording that you 'brood' more about things.

Joe90 wrote:
But now that I'm on tablets, I feel like close relatives are like monitoring me, like if I complain about something or just seem a bit quiet or upset, they're like ''I thought those tablets were working?'' So I feel like I've got to go around completely calm and happy all the time like a robot or something.

Ummm, no, they think that your prescription should be working better than it is, that you should not be as upset as you are.
I kinda don't understand why them scrutinizing you now that you're on meds makes you feel that you have to act happy though. 'I thought those tablets were working' doesn't sound like a criticism of you.

If you feel that the meds are working and that you've improved, tell them that and explain how.


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Joe90
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09 Jul 2014, 11:17 am

Can I just point out that the tablets I'm on have worked and have noticeably lessened my mood swings so I have noticed that I am in a good mood more than I'm in a bad mood, but like all humans I do have ''bad says'' every now and again too. Sometimes I may be a bit irritable during PMT, or if I'm tired or hungry after a hard day's work, or if I might just be having a bad day and nothing's going right, or if I'm worried about something like a blood test, etc. I'm always told to respect NTs if they are in a bad mood due to the same reasons I wrote above, and also in nearly every discussion I have read here about NTs it's always about emotions, emotions, emotions.


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rapidroy
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09 Jul 2014, 10:48 pm

I have noticed this in sports, if someone is disappointed in themselves or someone else they get angry and they show it, this is called showing passion, a drive to win, the sprit of a champion etc. the list goes on. Same situation, If the aspie gets angry people wonder if they are sick and sometimes threatened with medication. I suppose reactions change when there is a piece of paper that can explain your actions, people can't just accept that it may just be a healthy and normal reaction, they always revert back to the paper as some sort of manual. Defiantly a double standard at work here.



Kiprobalhato
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10 Jul 2014, 12:09 am

^exactly!!
i try to keep my quiet whenever i am competing in anything. i have gotten angry and been a little loud and shown it, later i've heard people mentioning my "anger problems" or my "specialness" and stuff like that, when i am just trying to be like everyone else when i try to show anger.
but...it might be because i scream non words.


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