Should I tell my ex I'm leaving?

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RikkiK
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15 Jul 2014, 3:26 pm

My bf and I broke up a little over a month ago. He was my first boyfriend and we went out for about 5 months. I wanted to stay friends with him because things actually ended well, but he was basically like, Let's not talk at all for the rest of summer. So, he wasn't that interested obviously. We would have been in clubs together and live near each other at school, so we were going to see each other a lot, but I decided to transfer. I also happened to get a new phone so he doesn't have my old number, if he were to hear I'm leaving and want to ask about it (but I really doubt he would try and get in contact with me for anything...but who knows). He also doesn't have a facebook. I'm over him and I know he's far from giving a darn about me at this point, but it does feel kind of douchey to not tell him I'm leaving. I'm just worried he'll be indifferent about it. I mean, I still consider him one of the best friends I've had.



YippySkippy
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15 Jul 2014, 3:31 pm

Quote:
I'm over him and I know he's far from giving a darn about me at this point


There's your answer. He doesn't need to know, and you're not breaking any social rules by not telling him.



Dantac
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15 Jul 2014, 3:49 pm

You're not obligated to but it wouldn't hurt to let him know you're leaving town. At worst he can simple say 'so?' and thats that. But you'll know you at least told him.



CommanderKeen
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15 Jul 2014, 6:15 pm

Dantac wrote:
You're not obligated to but it wouldn't hurt to let him know you're leaving town. At worst he can simple say 'so?' and thats that. But you'll know you at least told him.

He could say a lot worse than that, but yes there is no reason she would have to tell him.



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16 Jul 2014, 5:20 am

Unless you have concerns about domestic abuse, I would tell him it is over then go on your way.

If he has (or you think he will) beat you then move off first and then tell him it is all over.


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hale_bopp
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16 Jul 2014, 5:45 am

You don't owe him anything.

He told you to stay away, which usually means "I don't want to be friends".

The best thing you could do imo is don't bother telling him anything. If he is genuine he will come back as a friend. If he isn't, he won't, and TBH you don't need people like that around anyway.



The_Face_of_Boo
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16 Jul 2014, 5:57 am

The middle finger would do.



RikkiK
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16 Jul 2014, 12:14 pm

haha thanks for the advice. i guess i wanted so badly to not be the "ugh my ex is such an as*hole" person but honestly, that was pretty assey on his part so I shouldn't really care



cberg
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16 Jul 2014, 1:53 pm

RikkiK wrote:
haha thanks for the advice. i guess i wanted so badly to not be the "ugh my ex is such an as*hole" person but honestly, that was pretty assey on his part so I shouldn't really care


Everyone should care about each other, your relationship is one thing but inner peace means the most to anybody.


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michael517
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18 Jul 2014, 1:32 pm

Unless you had a child with him, the answer is no.



businezguy
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19 Jul 2014, 8:58 am

I agree with the folks who are saying just leave, and don't contact him. You are over him, now put him behind you forever and move on with your life. May sound cold, but it isn't. It's pretty normal. If this was the 70s, there wouldn't be Facebook and cell phones, etc. anyway. Just because we have so many modes of communication, it doesn't mean you have to actually *communicate*.