Help with writing an autistic character in my next novel?

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Yes, the important thing is to make him/her a fully rounded character, not a condition, not a stereotype, not one-dimensional.

We are not a set of symptoms!

The huge challenge for an NT writer would be to be able to imaginatively enter the soul of such a character, not just how the normocentric population oppresses him or her and reactions to that.

Making that imaginative leap will be difficult.

AmthystRose has a good point--pick a special interest for the boy that you also like, because if you do that, you'll be able to inject some of your own enthusiasm into his obsessive enjoyment of the subject. Usually it's not particularly good practice to create characters that share your likes and dislikes, if only to avoid creating a self-insert, but in this case I think it could be a useful write-what-you-know.

ClaireBridgeman. I think your aims are admirable. And your habit of doing lots of research on any given subject is an Aspie thing to do.

StarTrekker's advise over the years has always been comendable. I would encorrage you to contact her directly and involve her in the project (assuming she takes up such an offer).

For many of us, we love particular movies, books, music lyrics. Those words and actions resonate with us. So we often quote precisely from a movie in order to encapulate what was happening in the movie. I think it's kinda like trying to express an emotional state, we're trying to say "just like in this episode at this time when this event happened, that's how I feel now".

For a very good self documentary of Autism; Dona William's book "Nobody Nowhere" and the followup "Somebody Somewhere" will be excelent resources for you. She's also very approachable and has a web page where you could contact her directly.

I wish I had more time to add more. I'll try to catch up over the weekend and add a wall of text.

ClaireBridgeman;
You say you want your character to be likable by the reader, yet we get bullied and ostracized because we aren't likable. Your aims and our reality are at odds.

So who are you appealing to?
The bully? They'll laugh as they read your novel.
The Autistic/Aspergic? They'll relate to the character, but probably be offended and upset at seeing (being reminded) the same treatment they cop at school themselves.
The parents? Do any care?
The school system? They don't care.

I think you need to seriously consider who you are writting for. Perhaps an Autisitc/Aspergic person isn't the best for the story you wish to tell.

I don't think we get bullied because we aren't likeable; I think that's just mean.

I think we get bullied because bullies target those who are vulnerable. Someone who is internally freaking out because the hallway is too loud (or whatever sensory thing is making them freak out) is a vulnerable person. Someone who doesn't like to socialize and therefore doesn't have friends to protect them is a vulnerable person. Someone who wants more than anything else for everyone to just like them and who will do anything for friendship is a vulnerable person.

Thank you for the additional posts.

Yes, bullies pick on people who are vulnerable and, of course, different (and by that I mean those who are considered different). Those with behaviours that might be considered autistic may well fit that description, and therefore become a target. For me it was something else - I dared to be the person I was, to not hide away in spite of the fact that I wasn't very good looking. I did talent shows (and got booed off the stage... but not because I'm rubbish lol - see clairejemima.co.uk to judge for yourself!!), I spoke in assemblies, I was always there. in many ways I MADE myself a target for boys and girls alike. They didn't like how such an ugly and rather intelligent person (or geek, I suppose!) would dare to project herself and her interests, talent etc on everyone else. That's why I got picked on - I was different. People who are talented have to be pretty. Geeks have to be quiet. I was neither pretty nor quiet!!

I have taught one or two children with autism. One of them in particular was very likeable. He preferred to spend his time with the staff because he didn't feel that the students his age understood him. He was a very talented actor and like I said, I liked him a lot. But his classmates really didn't like him. Unfortunately he flipped out one too many times, attacking other students... I don't know the exact circumstances but I wouldn't be surprised if he was provoked. He ended up being permanently excluded.

So yes, the aim is to make him likeable to the audience. He isn't likeable to the bullies because they don't get to know him. They don't give him a chance because after witnessing some of his unusual behaviours, they label him as 'weird', a 'freak' etc.

I have written an opening for the character. Would it be worth posting it here and you guys could let me know what you think?

YESSSSSSS!

I look forward to reading the opening. I'm actually interested in reading the novel too.

Sorry I didn't get time over the weekend to put forward my own experiences. I'll steal some time from work to put down my thoughts.

Were you bullied at high school?
Some, not as much as primary school. That was terrible.
I played Dungeons and Dragons, we had a group of kids (about 8 to 12 in number) who had permission to use a classroom at lunch time and play D&D. So I was safe in a group, and safe in doors. We still got visited by bullies every now and then, and I was usually the one who stood up to defend us. I remember throwing a chair at one guy and missing, hitting his mate who was twice the size. I got dragged over the tables by the throat for that one.

Have you contemplated suicide?
Contemplated, and attempted. Apparently unsuccessful.
I suffered depression in my mid 20's due to lack of relationship. I so desperately wanted companionship, but got zip.
I've hated my life since my earliest childhood memories. I remember as a young child making myself a promise "I'll won't have any children, because I can't bear to put any child through what I went through". I was mid 30's by the time I realised that my children don't have to experience the same childhood I did. I'm a bit slow that way. (I wasn't diagnosed until 46).

I wonder if you have any input on what kind of interest I could give to my main character?
I was into dinosaurs in my early childhood. Studied and memorised everything about them.
Then Dungeons & Dragons in high school. Memorised all the manuals.
I don't recall having any special interest in my late primary school years. I loved riding my bike around everywhere, I guess that could almost be called a special interest.

so I was thinking of making him an exceptionally talented artist. I wonder what your thoughts are on this?
Many of us have a special interest, which we study to the point we can't find any more information on the subject. It's not a natural talent as such.
Over the years I've learned, or taught myself: Surfing, martial arts, computer programming, classic 50's & 60's cars (I owned two), advanced mathematics (3 dimensional vector maths), cabinet making, wood carving, oil painting, photography, fluid mechanics & hydrology (my special interest), acoustics, music theory (currently doing a 12month course), drumming, keyboards, song writing, music mastering.
None of these are a gifted. But I've delved into each subject to the exclusion of all else and taken it to the best of my abilities. Which are quite good. But it was all effort, all the way.

Cheers, and look forward to more.

Wow, Claire, you really do seem to be putting a tremendous amount of thought into this. I am amazed, and apologise wholeheartedly that my initial impression of you was based so thoroughly on wrong assumptions caused by lack of information.

What you're planning sounds great so far, with the exception of these few things that jumped out at me:

Autistic people very rarely get the chance to babble to anyone at all. It is rare for us to have friends, or be in the company of anyone who wants to listen to us. Again, this idea that autistic people walk up to perfect strangers and start babbling about our special interests is simply a stereotype that is untrue.

In reality, most of our life is played out inside our own heads, and we tend to talk or think to ourselves about our special interests, not to other people. Unless there happens to be someone in his life (or on the Internet) who shares his special interest, it would be far more realistic to depict him babbling to himself in the playground (not to others) and being called a freak.

That's assuming he's doing any babbling at all. He probably isn't (at least, not in the company of others). If he's being bullied, it is far more likely that he has become withdrawn, and just keeps his head down and doesn't look at anybody and is extremely quiet. He would only be babbling to himself in the playground if his autism were quite low-functioning or he was extremely eccentric, or had reached the point where the bullying was so bad that he just didn't care what others thought about him any more.

At school, he probably wouldn't talk to anybody at all about his special interest. He may initially, but once he realises how much people laugh at him, he will probably keep himself to himself. You could certainly consider having him talk to his family at home about his special interests. If you did that, you would have to decide how his family would react. Would they humour him? Become annoyed? Shout at him to shut up? How they react will depend upon the personalities you decide to give his parents and siblings.

Once he was forced into school, he probably wouldn't feel like talking to his family once he got home. It is very likely that, as soon as he got home from school, he would retreat upstairs to go into his bedroom and be alone, due to feeling drained from being in the company of other people all day at school. He would probably cry a lot there, or maybe do things to try and distract his brain and wind down, such as listen to music.

As others have pointed out, the idea that only one girl would be bulling him is extremely unlikely. He would probably be actively bullied by a minority gang of popular people, and ignored or treated as an outcast by all the rest. There might be one (or perhaps two) fellow odbods who he would hang around with, simply because their ?outcast? status had thrown them all together. They would not really be his friends per se, but just fellow outcasts that he ends up sitting next to because nobody else wants to sit next to any of them.




You need to specify what you mean by ?sensitive to touch.? All autistic people are sensitive to touch. However, it is a myth and a stereotype that all of them are touch phobic.

What you need to understand is that autistic people react more to sensory input than neurotypicals do. A smell, a taste, a sound etc will be experienced by us more intensely than by other people. The same applies to touch. But what you also need to understand is that we autistic people have no idea what it's like to be anybody else. So your character will not realise that other people's brains don't react to touch in the same way that he does. For him, his own experience of reality is ?normal,? because it's all he's ever known.

Generally speaking, there are two extremes in this particular area of touch: those who hate the overload of sensory input when others touch them, and those who love it. The former will be touch phobic. The latter will be hypersensual. Hypersensual people are extremely clingy huggers, and when they get into romantic relationships they will never want to stop hugging and kissing, because to them, the signals that their nerve endings are sending to their brain upon physical contact feel overwhelming in a nice way. Touch phobic people do not tend to like hugging or kissing at all, because to them, the signals that their nerve endings are sending to their brain upon physical contact feel overwhelming in a frightening and intrusive way.

Both kinds of extremes cause problems in relationships. Nobody wants to date a person who doesn't want to touch or kiss them, but equally well, nobody wants to date a person who is so physically clingy that they keep their partner lying in bed for hours, clinging to them in panic and holding them back down if they so much as mention that they need to venture to the bathroom and go for a pee.

If you are making your character go through puberty and you decide to make him touch phobic, he is unlikely to be fantasising about kissing girls or cuddling them. He is more likely to be extremely grossed out and frightened by that idea, and puzzled as to why other people seem to like it. At home, he will ward off hugs from his parents and may stand there stiffly and awkwardly when they try to give him a hug.

If you decide to make him hyper sensual, he will likely be fantasising about kissing girls and may become accidentally promiscuous due to loving physical contact so much that he simply can't say no. At home, he will rush up behind his parents and give them extremely affectionate hugs, and annoy them repeatedly by following them round the house stuck to them like a limpet, and simply refusing to let go.

If you decide to make him ?normal? in this area, he could be somewhere in the middle: neither touch phobic nor hypersensual. That would be uncommon, but plausible. Since no one person has all the listed traits of autism, there are plenty of autistic people who are "normal" when it comes to the area of touch.



I noticed you did not mention the word "meltdown." You only mentioned panic attacks. It's worth mentioning here that not all autistic people have panic attacks, but they do all have meltdowns. I am autistic and have meltdowns more or less frequently, depending on my emotional state, but have only ever had one panic attack in my entire life. A panic attack is not the same thing as a meltdown. If you are not sure of the difference, you need to go and research those two things.

Also, please note that all sufferers of panic attacks tend to experience more or less the same symptoms, but meltdowns can manifest in different ways, depending on the person's personality. Violent people may have meltdowns that consist of frightening violent outbursts of yelling and physical violence, whereas gentler people may just have meltdowns that manifest as feeling helpless and crying inconsolably and feeling that they want to die. *raises hand*

My dad's kind of meltdown was picking up a TV and smashing it against the wall, whereas my kind of meltdown is crying as quietly as possible so that nobody will hear me, and hiding underneath the bedcovers and wishing I could die. How your character has a meltdown will depend upon the personality you give him, you see. What meltdowns all have in common is that the brain is overwhelmed. How that person handles the feeling will depend upon their personality.





Ouch. Now you're heading into new territory: home education. Again, this is something you will need to research a little before writing about it.

I was home educated until the age of twelve, and then sent to High School, so I know a bit about it. If you are writing a British novel, please do not use American terminology to refer to home education, as this will frustrate and annoy British home educating families. In the UK, the noun is ?home education,? not ?home schooling.? Children who are taught at home are referred to as ?home educated? and their parents are "home educators" or ?home edders.?

It is a common misconception that British children must attend a school to sit their GCSEs. In fact, that is not the case. I know of many home educated children who did not attend school at all.

Unless the law has changed since I was a lass (which I do not think it has), exams are not compulsory. The only thing that is compulsory is an education. If a home educator wishes their child to sit GCSEs without attending school, it is perfectly possible to arrange for the child to sit the exams somewhere as an independent candidate. Also, if a home educator doesn't feel the need for their child to sit GCSEs at all, there is no particular reason why they must. Most universities will accept home educated candidates with no official qualifications. The OU in particular has no requirement that any of its students hold any exam certificates at all.

Therefore, your plot of sending the boy to school to get his GCSEs is not plausible unless you specify a particular reason why the boy's parents insist on him attending school.

Perhaps the parents feel very strongly that gaining an official exam certificate will benefit his future job opportunities. But, as I have explained above, that is unlikely, since if they were home educating him already, they probably know the law and know that their son could easily be accepted into uni even without GCSEs.

So you will need to come up with a plausible reason why your character's parents are suddenly forcing him to go to school.

Perhaps one of his parents has died or had an accident or walked out on the family, and the surviving/remaining parent now has all their time taken up with work, and no time for home education.

Perhaps the parents simply feel unequipped to give their son a good education in certain subjects now he's reached a higher level. (This was my parents' reason for sending me to school. My mum taught me up until the age of twelve, but then started to feel out of her depth and felt she did not know enough). I felt absolutely terrified at being sent to school, and pleaded with her over and over again not to send me. But send me she did. I was mercilessly bullied by some children, and ignored by others (see above). It was not a nice time.

For more information on home education in the UK, this website will be helpful:

http://www.educationotherwise.net




That depends entirely on his personality. People with autism are not clones. We are all different. You have to decide what personality you want to give the boy. Autism is not personality. It's just a syndrome.

If the boy's anger has a short fuse, he will lash out instantly. If he has a long fuse, his anger may simmer underneath the surface, and then one day he may just snap and lash out and surprise the bullies by fighting back. If he is a bitter and vengeful person, he may just fight the bullies back all the time, and may even bully others himself and get into trouble for bad behaviour. If he is a meek and gentle soul without a vengeful or fiery bone in his body, he will just tremble and quiver and run away to hide in the toilets.

These things do not depend upon his autism. They depend upon his soul; his own unique personality. Please give him one. He needs it. Otherwise, he will just be a caricature of a stereotype.

Hope this helps. xx

Last edited by thumbhole on 15 Aug 2014, 8:16 am, edited 1 time in total.

It also depends heavily on his mood at that moment in time.
It also depends on if this bully has done anything else over time, or in previous years.

I think there are at least two forms of bullying:
The easier one is the physical bully. He'll walk up to you and belly bump you. If you raise your arms to ballance yourself he'll grab them.
The one that does untold long term damage is the character assassin type. They get you right where it hurts most, and they are crewl and hatefuly beyond words. Then they'll turn to their friends and they'll all have a good laugh at you. If you want your character to lash out into a crowd of kids uncareing about if he gets hurt or not, this is the time.

NOTE: I didn't realize the date on the forum when I first posted. I know now that it is kind of irrelvant. Whoops.

It's nice to see that you want to write a character with autism. Canon autistic characters aren't that common, and it is great to see that you want to try and integrate autism into your book!

Were you bullied at high school? Can you tell me about how you reacted to it? If you had to write a diary about what happened at the time, what would you have written?
I personally was never bullied. I was fortunate enough to have grown up in a very accepting community and family (most of my family is neorodiverse as well.)

However, school was an immense struggle for me. Sensory wise I got overloaded very often. At my worst, I was only able to stay in school a third of the time (that was in middle school.) I had meltdowns multiple times a day, and sometimes my parents had to pick me up early from school.

Have you contemplated suicide? (I know this is very personal so feel free to totally not answer this one.) Can you tell me more about what you went through?
At my worst points I did think about it, but it was something I never thought I could go through with. Since so many people cared about me, I couldn’t bear the thought of hurting them like that. If you are writing a character that feels that nobody cares about them, then that could make it difficult for them to see why they should stay alive.

I have read that some people on the autistic spectrum have very detailed knowledge on niche interests. I wonder if you have any input on what kind of interest I could give to my main character?
Giving your character an interest that is very obscure could make it difficult for them to find friends. Once I met someone (who was probably on the spectrum) who only talked about their salt water tank and their chickens. Also I read in one of Temple Grandin’s books that she struggled to find others who were interested in a mechanism used to calm cows.

I don't want to be completely stereotypical and give my main character a talent in maths, so I was thinking of making him an exceptionally talented artist. I wonder what your thoughts are on this?
I like that idea, since I am an artist too. Also, it could help to convey the emotional side to your character. You could have their art change as they get bullied, if the character doesn’t know how to communicate their feelings directly. However, I don’t think having them be good at math is bad, as long as not everything about the character is a stereotype.

And really, what general help can you give me with the way in which he should communicate? I'm thinking I need to avoid making him use sarcasm and figurative language - would that be an accurate reflection of how many or most of those on the autistic spectrum communicate?
Personally, I never had too many issues with sarcasm outside of elementary school. Autism mainly affects me in speech by making it harder for me to start a conversation, and maintain it. I am told the way I start conversations is awkward, but also amusing. If I am unsure on how to start a conversation, I will start with some sort of greeting but forget to follow it up with an actual topic to talk about. Also, I will sometimes have another idea I want to incorporate into the conversation, but it will not connect to the previous topic smoothly. However, the more comfortable I am with a person, the better I tend to do.

Really, anything you can tell me that will help me make this kid a believable character and avoid hitting too many cliches or coming across like an incredibly stupid person who has no idea about autism, that would be great. I really want to be sensitive to the condition.
As long as autism isn’t a personality trait, I think you will be fine. Autism may be a part of someone, but it will never be their entire persona. You don’t have to completely avoid stereotypes. Most of us fit into some sort of stereotype, but very rarely all of them. Considering your genuine concern to portray autism respectfully, I think you should be fine.

P.S. Enjoy writing your book!

Last edited by Hydromind on 11 May 2018, 9:04 pm, edited 1 time in total.

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