I need advice *updated

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Hi my name is Abdi,i'm a 21 year old male and i think i might have aspergers.

before i start i would like to thank any one who posted any suggestion or advice,lets start off with what made me think of aspergers or autism at all. when i was 16 i was made homeless and i lived in a halfway house, in this half way house i spoke to a worker who out of the blue told me that i might have aspergers due to the fact that i didnt give anyone eye contact despite the fact that i was getting along with everyone ( although i was lending out money to people but in small amounts) i quickly became friends with everyone and they told me that they considered me "a weird but nice person" i was already used to being called weird. i however refused her advice to get a diagnoses then because even though i knew already up to that point that i was different than others i had accepted it and moved on.

2 days ago i went out with a friend to watch expendables and visited a shisha bar before and while we were in the small open air bar with low music levels and mild discussion i noticed that i couldn't hear my friend talking as the other voices and music were distracting me. i also noticed that slight accents will slightly confuse me. i didn't enjoy the movie everyone was too odd and the loud noises were becoming unbearable towards the forcing me to block my ears slightly

my family thinks i am a liar due to my poor explanation skills leading to many confusing conversation (i often stop and think during conversation about what to say during conversations leading to some people telling me i might be deceptive but in reality all i want is the person to understand fully)


when i was a bit younger i had no friends and was frequently bullied from the age of 6 till i was 11. between those ages i used to live in the Netherlands and according to my sister the school were going to test my IQ shortly before we left due to the fact that i was progressing faster than others students but my other sister said that at that age the teacher also had concerns that i was emotionally under developed.

all i remember of that age was being alone and having a rigid structure of school then biking or on Wednesdays going to activities such as cooking or go kart racing. looking back at this age i do remember that i would get in to fights for minor insults and misinterpreting however my family said that i was normal. looking back i think i had such a good routine that i would often come home at sunset watch tv and then sleep.

i am currently 21 and notice small behaviour quirks that in the past i attributed to social anxiety such as irregular eyecontact and the inability to filter out noise. i also have a problem focusing visually when someone is talking or i can not hear a person because i am distracted visually.my sister often says to me that i should get tested for deafness.

at age 13 i thought i was friends with a person who was actually making sarcastic comments however i didnt understand. however we did later on become friends and now we drifted apart.

a few weeks ago when i was trying to decided whether or not go for a diagnoses a old friend of mine that i hadnt seen for a year told me that that year he was studying and became friends with a person who has aspergers and told me that we had similar behaviour.


he told me when we used to hang out that i would be talkative and lively if the group was less than 3 and when it exceed that limit i would become withdrawn and i had would occasionally talk about something that completely beyond their understanding but they didnt mind because i was a quiet person.


my sisters often tell me that i am stubborn( i hate being lied to and i have fallen for some lies such as i once asked what happened to our living room carpet and my family told me that we were moving. i then told my friends and teachers that i was moving and you can imagine what occurred). my aunt who i live with tells me that i am stubborn and not religious enough. my sisters tell me that they suspect that i might be a atheist but i am more agnostic.

Im more of a shutdown person and i can suppress my emotions well provided that if am close to a meltdown i am isolated i can calm down.
i think the previous sentence is true because i used to have meltdowns (alot of broken windows and door handles plus caved in doors in my house when i was growing up)

i can read peoples face well enough to cope however micro expression occur and add the overall lack of social skill( such as the inability to see where the conversation is heading).

my family thinks i am addict to the computer but in reality i used to the computer to avoid them as i find them too chaotic. i do admit i spend alot on the computer(for leisure and learning) i used to spend a large amount of time playing games (briefly obsessed but nowadays not really bother) i spend the last year taking a break from education and learned Spanish (a bit) JavaScript(upper beginners level) html (halfway done CSS) a bit of french (maybe a month) same for German. python(upper beginners level). i want to learn but i feel my situation is too hectic

what do you think?

sorry for the spelling mistakes i am not good when it comes to english or writing in general

I didn't vote because I don't really know.

It's possible you have Asperger's. You appear to have some of the symptoms. I'd have to see you in person, though. You should try to get evaluated by a professional

Are you located in the Netherlands now?

Hello Abdi and welcome to WP. We are not allowed nor qualified to diagnose you here and I would not be so bold as to venture to guess what you might have but I think that you should seek a professional opinion if it is possible. There are also some free online tests that you can take. They are not able to tell you if you have Asperger's or not but some of them are used to screen candidates for diagnoses so you can tell if you have symptoms and traits of Asperger's and Autism by taking them. "Scientist" made a wonderful thread the other day listing a bunch of free online tests that you can take. I am having a bit of trouble seeing that thread. Maybe "Scientist" or someone else can post the link to it. But some of the tests that come to mind are the Cambridge AQ Quiz, the RAADS, the Queendom Emotional Quotient quiz, there is a face recognition quiz, there are also quizzes that test your facial expression recognition. There are quite a few you can take that can give you an idea of your symptoms. But those would be a good place to start.

Skibum i did take the those tests in the past and they have always said that i have ASD but i didnt much care really

kraftikorte

i no longer live in Nederland but i loved living there when i was younger.

Welcome to Wrong Planet. You seem at home here to me. Aspergers and social anxiety often occur together, so one doesn't rule out the other. Eventually I recovered from the social anxiety, though not the core features of Aspergers (though I can manage some of these things much better after many years).

Things got a lot better for me after I arrived at Wrong Planet. I hope this will be your experience too.

B19 thank you

Where do you live now?

That moment when you read someone having the same issue with following conversations.
It is REALLY easy for me to switch to a full blown daydream during a conversation and i respond with 'yeah..' occassionaly so they dont stop talking and so they think i am still following them in their part of the conversation. When they are done, i missed about 70% of the stuff he told me

suncatcher i used to stare at people and daydream so much in my sociology class that i noticed that i was having problems focusing

i used to stare at people then stare at another person and jump to the next one
must have made seem like a weirdo