How can I stop thinking about this silly thing?

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jk1
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15 Oct 2014, 1:56 pm

I think this is more related to OCD but I believe my OCD stems from my autism. So I put this here.

Any way, I bought (ordered) a pair of noise-canceling headphones. Two colors were available. I chose black without thinking much. Now I regret that quick decision. The more I look at the white ones (with light brown ear pads) on the Internet, the more I want the white ones.

The sense of regret is so strong that I can't help wasting my time keeping thinking about it all the time since yesterday. My mind is busy with the following two mental activities.

1. I keep thinking about why I want the white ones so much. I just keep trying to describe how the white ones must feel if I had them on as opposed to the black ones, using such words as "cozy", "warm" etc. Doing this makes me regret even more.

2. I keep trying to convince myself that black ones are actually better because dark (black leather) ear pads won't get dark oily stains from skin oil after months of use, whereas light brown ear pads may look yukky when skin oil stains them.

Does anyone know how I can stop this? Do you think the black ones are better?



Swiper
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15 Oct 2014, 2:03 pm

Return the black ones, buy the white ones, and be happy.


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Autism Spectrum Disorder, Level 1 (with language impairment) and Other Specified Anxiety Disorder
Aspie Score: 140 of 200, NT Score: 63 of 200
You are very likely neurodiverse (Aspie)


Last edited by Swiper on 15 Oct 2014, 2:27 pm, edited 1 time in total.

skibum
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15 Oct 2014, 2:09 pm

^^^ yes! Or get the white ones too and you will have both and when your mood changes you can switch! :D


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Nambo
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15 Oct 2014, 2:54 pm

I think these new white headphones fad looks silly.
Maybe if you had chosen white, you would now be posting wishing you had chosen black.
I expect they feel exactly the same.
I get this OCD sometimes but have reached the age where I am fed up with it spoiling my life and so I ignore it.
If you earn more than £2500 a year you are richer than half the worlds population, most people on earth would be happy to even have something to plug a pair of headphones into.
You cannot alter the past so make yourself enjoy the present more by refusing to let OCD spoil your life.



QuiversWhiskers
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15 Oct 2014, 3:32 pm

I have this too. I do think it is an anxiety thing with OCD vaguely underlying it. The best way I can describe it is that I will pick something but then feel more attracted to the other thing and wish I had gotten the other. It often results in that horrible jump-out-of-the-skin, peeved feeling. I wonder what would have happened and what I am missing out on without the other thing. Just as you were saying.

What I do is, if it is something small and cheap, I might go get the other. If not, then I say in my mind every time I think about the other one, "It is insensible to spend money another. I already have one. I don't need that other one." If I have a weird emotional attachment to the item and feel bad for it for rejecting it (I know this might sound weird but I've had this since I was a kid; I know it's ridiculous), like I have hurt its feelings, I add other things, like "That's ridiculous." To make these words more "stern" or serious to you in changing your attachments to the other object, you could picture Jean Luc Picard saying, "Make it so." Or some appropriate command from some other character you really like. That might sound silly, but I am not joking around. Go do your stim of choice or whatever your body is provoking you to do.

I also recommend putting the headphones you have somewhere out of sight. Just to have a break from looking at them. Go do something else.

None of this may work, I know. I've had so many things I couldn't even use because it agitated me so much about the other one I didn't have. Sometimes nothing works against this.



RichardJ
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15 Oct 2014, 3:51 pm

Nambo wrote:
I think these new white headphones fad looks silly.
Maybe if you had chosen white, you would now be posting wishing you had chosen black.
I expect they feel exactly the same.
I get this OCD sometimes but have reached the age where I am fed up with it spoiling my life and so I ignore it.
If you earn more than £2500 a year you are richer than half the worlds population, most people on earth would be happy to even have something to plug a pair of headphones into.
You cannot alter the past so make yourself enjoy the present more by refusing to let OCD spoil your life.


Ditto! Capital concept!



jk1
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16 Oct 2014, 11:45 am

Thank you for responding to my stupid post. I had better mention that this "headphone regret" is just one of many regrets I have quite often. I believe that it's a symptom of OCD.

Swiper and skibum: Yes, returning the black ones and buying the white ones is what I'd like to do. The problem is I'm going overseas at the end of this month (in two weeks) and I need the headphones during the flight and while I'm overseas. The black ones are due to be delivered on the Oct 23rd, a week before I fly out. I think I have run out of time. And yes, I thought about getting both but they are not cheap.

Nambo and RichardJ: I'm aware that what I'm stressed about sounds very silly. And I know the black ones and while ones will feel exactly the same when I use them. I can't even see them while I'm using them. But thinking rationally can't always beat OCD. You know it's silly, ridiculous etc, but you still can't stop it. That's why I'm asking people how I can stop this silliness. Comparing my problem with the problems that the people in the third world countries have is pointless. My life is happening in Australia. One thing you said is true. I might have regretted it if I had ordered the white ones. I'm extremely indecisive and decisions are often followed by regrets.

QuiversWhiskers: I understand what you mean. I'm often paralyzed by the thoughts of other possibilities and regrets that come from them. I also sometimes have that emotional attachment to things and rejecting something can sometimes feel really bad (although this headphone problem doesn't involve that). That can sometimes affect my decision. Any way, there is no way I can hide the headphones where I cannot see them because I will be using them for several hours every day. But as you said I'm worried that I may be reminded of the white headphones every time I use the black ones and keep regretting this decision for a long time.



Nambo
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16 Oct 2014, 3:42 pm

JK1
I certainly don't think you are silly.
I have gone through this sort of thing my entire life, I am old enough to have learnt to ignore it and wish to impart to you that you could enjoy life so much more if you could too.

I wish the world could be perfect in every way, but its wrong in so many ways and fretting about it, especially past actions, can never change it.
Try to learnt to think about things more before you act upon them, and then learnt that you did the best you could at the time so its not worth worrying about the consequences as they cannot be changed.