What is / was your self-confidence like?

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It's gotten better over the years. It used to be absolutely terrible. I can still get quite nervous and fumbly under pressure - even break into a sweat. But, following the principle that sometimes we just have to face our fears - It's a lot better and a lot less debilitating than it used to be. It helps that I try to avoid people and situations who are intolerant of even a little bit of under-confidence. It helps that I found a place to work and live that is relatively tolerant and less stressful.

It's still low. I'm extremely anxious in new situations and don't handle change well. I can't approach a task or another person with much confidence, ever.

The frustrating part is everyone's solution is "you just have to be confident" really? You'd think if I could, I would just goddamn do it, wouldn't you? It's not like I can flip a switch in my brain. I have very serious anxiety that doesn't just go away overnight.