Almost meltdown in faculty meeting

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First of all, why should any meeting last 3 hours? Every other week I have to go sit with all the other faculty (all women) for the faculty meeting. They don't stick to the agenda, they have side conversations, they go on and on about nothing at all. I usually bring my laptop and get work done because it's so boring and pointless.

Anyway, today was a doozy. I have two students in danger of failing my lab portion of the class. I am the lowest person on the faculty, and unfortunately, the professor who is responsible for my lab section has had a total hands-off approach, and has left me to deal with these two students on my own. These are students who have probably been dedicated to this profession for at least the last 4 years, and to fail them is not done lightly. But to pass them could be deadly, as it is an RN program to which I refer.

Anyway, I'm just a tad stressed about this. Today, in a 3 hour meeting with 12 other women, this professor, after being completely unhelpful last week, LIED about sending me something, IGNORED me when having a conversation about these students, and said, in front of everybody "I'm not their clinical instructor. I'm not dealing with it".

I got so angry, and to have to be so pissed off while in a closed-door meeting with 12 people - I really almost walked out of it several times. I had to tell myself that walking out would be a big mistake. So I literally gritted my teeth (so that's where that saying comes from) clenched both fists, and tried to calm myself down. I'm still upset.

I wrote the Dean a note about why I was upset, and fortunately, she was able to bring the meeting around somewhat.

I've only had this job since January, I love teaching the students but I HATE the politics. Oh where oh were will I ever find a job that doesn't make me have meltdowns?????

Good for you for sticking it out. I take it you're a university professor? You're right, meetings are complete BS, amd every boss I have had lies too, so you're not alone.

Ironic.....I am an analyst (lab scientist/chemist). Anyway, this very afternoon I had a 2.5 hr meeting, which is relatively unusual. This meeting was instigated by administration, who have little in common with the 23 lab analysts. I really did not understand the motivational meeting at all, I just attended and was respectfully quiet. There were yellow daffodils on the table and I sat next to an older Yugoslavian analyst I do like. Afterward, I felt strange - very far away. My co-worker, the one I sat next to, said I was really stemming throughout the entire meeting. I feel sad. He said not to feel badly since it's involuntary. Still, I do. I often rock back and forth. Also, I've been feeling very tired lately, which does not help. So, while I did not have a "meltdown," as you described, I understand in a different way. I do not have a temper at all, but my difference is noticeable and I am conscientious. sigh.

How apt. Yes, on the outside, or to NT's, you and I would not appear to be similar at all. But we both know how similar we are.

Sometimes it makes you think that politics was invented in a University.. actually it was?


Anyway....uhh I would walk out!... if it's a waste of time then it's a waste of time,, if they are wasting time they you should help them!

Yep... If they think it's a good idea to go on about, what heppened here, and how this was done.. and just how much apples at the canteen had gone up in price... join in ! !

There is a consensus in Established work environments -> especially at the meeting.... if we (the employees) can get the work done outside these doors, than why bother going over it, when we have to deal with it all day anyway -> each person in the room already knows what they have to do, almost instinctively, so why go over it. (you are going to have to learn to let go, turn your job into an instinct, and learn to blend in during the meetings)

-What happens to the people that become the Nannying Meeting Holders ---they get fired.... if you start to try to piont out the fact that you don't know what to do, or you highlight it too often that you wnat to discuss a topic, then they will kick ur arse.

-When to highlight what: you need to highlight , and show your importance in very discreet ways... things that no-one, or one other supportive person has thought of could be highlighted... this way you will either look commanding (if it's original) or observive (if some-one aggrees and says that they have thought of tha before)

--Do you get what I am getting at.. the NT world doen't reward on merits of working like Chinese all day, it rewards on the Merits of a person to be able to task enjoyment and the job at the same time.

Alyisa, I know those pesky melotdowns are no fun. I could never figure out why NTs do some of the things they do. Especially in the work enviornment. For what its worth, I don't belive NTs are equipped to work with us. At least it seems they don't want to.
J.C.

Aylissa, the type of meetings you describe indicate poor management skills on the part of whoever is in charge. If you can, try to encourage the person running the meetings to (1) have an agenda (including both topics and the time allocated for discussion), and (2) to stick to that agenda.

I am also in academia, but in a research, rather than teaching position. I have had to sit through my share of 2 to 3 hour meetings. One of co-workers tried to deal with this problem in the manner I just described. Unfortunately, he was unsuccessful. Then he noticed that our boss had to leave work by 5:30 pm to go pick up her child from daycare. So my co-worker and I started having the meetings scheduled to begin at 4:00 pm. This worked for a while, but I think our boss eventually got wise to this because she started scheduling the meetings earlier in the day. Now I try to have them start at 11 am because by noon everyone wants to leave to go get lunch.

Good luck!

I haven't figured this one out either. I'm also a college professor, and when our department meets, it seems that it is to go over things we could have done by email, or to have a few people who love to hear themselves talk do so. Then we listen to presentations by staff members who obviously don't know or understand what we do, are asked to participate in processes that make no sense, and endorse irrational actions that the group will realize a meeting or two later were actually contrary to the desired impact. That is, if we were told the truth about it in the first place. I would go hide somewhere if they weren't mandatory. And I've given up on not stimming. My main fear is being unable to keep my mouth shut when someone says something blatantly absurd.

I know. I always tell myself to just sit there, not react, not say anything, but it doesn't work.

The above situation has devolved in the last month to the point where I intend never to see any of these people again. I am doing my teaching with the students, but refuse to have anything to do with the faculty any more. Since this job ends in a month, I figure I can get away with that.