How old is too old to not have a career yet?

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WantToHaveALife
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20 Apr 2015, 6:31 am

first time back here in a while, I will admit, me being born a guy(as in human male), it gets annoying, and often enrages me, on how it seems we are judged, valued, defined by our job, career, occupation, stability, income, what we are doing with our life or where we are headed in life.



Aspiringeccentric
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20 Apr 2015, 11:30 am

I'm 25 and am a cashier and Starbucks barista in training. I'll be damned if that is going to be my career. I was put of S.S. by my father and for the longest time I didn't work. Now I've graduated from college with a theatre degree which I have no interest in perusing. Cashier and Starbucks barista will be the only big things under my belt. I feel though, if I get involved with a career right now, I'm eventually going to hate it and be stuck. I don't think there is any career path out there that where I could stand doing the same thing 5 days a week for 30 years.

As for people looking for college education. Skip the big schools and stick with community colleges. At least if you prefer becoming knowledgeable over getting a piece of paper. My time at a community college taught me so much more than my University ever did. Smaller class size so you can talk one on one with the teacher and a much more tolerable and laid back environment. At least this was my experience.

When going to interviews, the key really is to practice practice practice!! ! Its more about what they want to hear. If you want some coaching, there are community services available for that. I admit that I went to unemployment and one of my caseworkers was really helpful about how to go about searching for jobs, navigating job fairs, and interviewing. Most likely you will screw up your first couple. Its going to happen. You just have to figure out what to say and what not to. If that makes any sense...



KimD
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20 Apr 2015, 12:04 pm

WantToHaveALife wrote:
first time back here in a while, I will admit, me being born a guy(as in human male), it gets annoying, and often enrages me, on how it seems we are judged, valued, defined by our job, career, occupation, stability, income, what we are doing with our life or where we are headed in life.


Some people still judge women the same way with regards to a husband and children. I know that some will "forgive" me for not having children of my own because "at least" I teach. I am soooo glad that I don't live in a more conservative region!



WantToHaveALife
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20 Apr 2015, 12:24 pm

Aspiringeccentric wrote:
I'm 25 and am a cashier and Starbucks barista in training. I'll be damned if that is going to be my career. I was put of S.S. by my father and for the longest time I didn't work. Now I've graduated from college with a theatre degree which I have no interest in perusing. Cashier and Starbucks barista will be the only big things under my belt. I feel though, if I get involved with a career right now, I'm eventually going to hate it and be stuck. I don't think there is any career path out there that where I could stand doing the same thing 5 days a week for 30 years.

As for people looking for college education. Skip the big schools and stick with community colleges. At least if you prefer becoming knowledgeable over getting a piece of paper. My time at a community college taught me so much more than my University ever did. Smaller class size so you can talk one on one with the teacher and a much more tolerable and laid back environment. At least this was my experience.

When going to interviews, the key really is to practice practice practice!! ! Its more about what they want to hear. If you want some coaching, there are community services available for that. I admit that I went to unemployment and one of my caseworkers was really helpful about how to go about searching for jobs, navigating job fairs, and interviewing. Most likely you will screw up your first couple. Its going to happen. You just have to figure out what to say and what not to. If that makes any sense...


ya well i'm 27 and all I have is a high school diploma



xenocity
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20 Apr 2015, 12:33 pm

It really depends on where you live, what the norms are...

In the U.S. you should be done with education by 21, married by 23, career by 25 with kids on the away, and house by 27.


In reality that is very hard to do, unless you are well connected and/or come from money.

In the Great Lakes states we were hit hard with a deep recession around 2001, which created high unemployment for a lot of career people, who in turn took low paying jobs including fast food.
This left very little jobs for college and teens.

Then the national/global meltdown of 2008, made everything even worse (it hasn't recovered for the most part yet)
A college student wanting unpaid internship in your field of study? We don't want you, you're not experienced enough to work for free!

You want to work low end jobs... You are too educated and/or over experienced...!

Post 2008 and up, you are lucky if you can land a job in your teens, 20s and early 30s of any sort due to everyone older and more experienced working for the same price.

Hell I am too over educated and over experienced for retail and other low end jobs, while being too under educated/under experienced for unpaid and paid internships which since 2011 require you to have 2+ years of industry experience, certifications (most which require you to be working to obtain them), GPA of 3.0 - 3.5 (which wasn't a problem for me) and other stupid stuff.

What entry level stuff that does exist has asinine requirements such as 3-5+ industry work experience, certifications that can only be obtained via working, and other idiotic things such as knowing how to use enterprising software (which costs $5,000+ to buy and most companies won't let you learn it until 5+ years on the job), whatever software the company decides to use (which you don't encounter in everyday usage even in college), and/or the company's proprietary software (how can you expect people to have experience with it, if it is proprietary?)

Oh and the former dean of my school had to end his internship program in 2011, because companies were outright refusing to hire college students when they could get people in their 40s and 50s with all the experiences working for the same price as college students.

I was literally declined internships post 2011 because I didn't have enough "industry experience" or work experience despite having 3 internships previous and loads of actual IT projects under my belt.

So, now nearing the age of 30 in 9 weeks or so, I am unemployed graduate with a Masters in IT Management, double bachelors in Marketing and Information Systems, and an Sssociates in Business Administration with tons of software skills, project skills, 3 internships etc... yet unemployed because I'm of reasons ranging from not being perfect enough (was literally told this) to not enough "industry experience" to not knowing the software (I can't possible learn all the software in the world), and other asinine reasons...!

I graduated from the masters program last July...

My campus was right around the corner of the Chrysler HQ and within an hour of General Motors HQ, Ford HQ, Compuware HQ, and many other fortune 500 companies HQs.

Nearly every state has a glut of unemployed and/or underemployed professionals and trades people in their late 30s, 40s, and 50s.
These people range from engineers of sorts to teachers to machinist, etc...

Though if you live on the West Coast, things are a lot better than the rest of the country.

Though with that said, we are still in a jobless recovery as in companies are still reluctant to ramp hiring and the number of people coming of age/graduating is greater than the number of jobs being created each month.
Add that to the number of under and unemployed older people, leads to a job shortage.

Also the U.S. unemployment numbers are calculated based on the number of jobs created and the number of people receiving unemployment benefits and job help from the state and federal agencies.
If you aren't getting government benefits, you aren't counted in the unemployment numbers.


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WantToHaveALife
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21 Apr 2015, 11:35 am

and sometimes i feel insecure about the fact that i still live with my parents, although the good news is that i know as of recently, i have the potential to move out of my parents house in the meantime to move in with a few friends to be roommates with them, but in order for that to happen, i would need an increase in hours at my current grocery store job, but the paycheck i would be getting from there would only be enough to pitch in to pay the rent, i still would not be receiving a large enough paycheck in which it is enough for me to be fully financially self-sufficient, responsible, my parents would still be paying my health insurance, cell phone bill, other bills, etc., the only thing i would be paying is pitching in to pay rent to live with roommates.



KimD
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21 Apr 2015, 4:41 pm

xenocity wrote:

In the U.S. you should be done with education by 21, married by 23, career by 25 with kids on the away, and house by 27.


:lol:

I hope you don't honestly believe that you can (or should) schedule the sort of sincere, committed, emotionally healthy relationship that generally leads to a fulfilling marriage as if it's merely an auto-repair appointment!



kraftiekortie
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21 Apr 2015, 5:04 pm

I'm 54, and I have a job as a government clerk, not a career.

When I retire, I might embark upon a career as a social worker.



xenocity
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21 Apr 2015, 7:11 pm

KimD wrote:
xenocity wrote:

In the U.S. you should be done with education by 21, married by 23, career by 25 with kids on the away, and house by 27.


:lol:

I hope you don't honestly believe that you can (or should) schedule the sort of sincere, committed, emotionally healthy relationship that generally leads to a fulfilling marriage as if it's merely an auto-repair appointment!


Maybe it's due to the fact I am from Michigan, still living in Michigan, but people even in my only family think it is strange that I am 29 (Turning 30 in almost two months) and finished college just after turning 29 (masters) and have no career yet (I've been trying to get hired for two years now).

They also find it weird that I am not married yet (I'm gay and not interested in dating all that much...), I've been hearing it since 24.

Even therapists have told me I'm bucking social norms and that is considered unusual by American standards.


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KimD
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23 Apr 2015, 6:56 am

xenocity,

I did a quick online search on the average age of marriage and in numerous countries around the world, the average is almost never as young as 23—in the Americas, that’s not even the average age for women--who are usually a few years younger than their spouses! In fact, the last time that the average age for marriage American men was as low as 23, was the 1950s. Since 1960, it has risen steadily to 26-27 years for men—and that’s the AVERAGE, not some requirement or deadline.

I see that in Michigan, people can get married at age 16 with parental consent, but that’s probably an age-old law designed to help out pregnant teens in a very different era. (I doubt you’re living in Mayberry with Sherriff Andy Taylor—those days are pretty much over!) If I understand you correctly, your family is giving you the idea that you’re way off schedule--based on an inaccurate timeline--and there’s something wrong with that. I call B.S. on them!

In this era in the U.S., it’s understood by many that marrying “too young” can actually hinder a relationship, as not everyone is emotionally mature or prepared to trade in their single-hood until they’ve been out of college for at least a few years. Besides that, life expectancy in the U.S. has steadily risen since the 1950s, so lots of people feel there is less reason to rush. As for women, more are going to college and prefer to live more independently and for longer than their grandmothers or mothers before they walk down the aisle. In fact, when I was in college in 1990, I had a classmate/friend my age who’d already gotten married—and she was the only one I’d even heard of. It worked fine for her and her husband, but they were the ones bucking the trend. Women who got married right after college in those days were viewed as a bit desperate or needy, even if they weren’t. I don't think that's changed.

Many people put off marrying until they’re financially secure enough to support a spouse--and perhaps help pay for the wedding, too. With the higher rates of divorce seen in the last 50 years or so, many people take things more slowly until they’re sure that they’ve picked their spouse wisely—marriage isn’t just about creating progeny, uniting two clans or economic forces, or trying to hide an unplanned pregnancy just to avoid embarrassing your parents anymore.

As I'm sure you know, it’s even less unusual for LGBT people to get married later (if it’s even legal in their state yet) because it can be harder to find a suitable date when you’re searching a smaller population in the first place!

If you want to “catch up” to their rather arbitrary standards, don’t put so much pressure on yourself that you actually sabotage your efforts. If you’re comfortable with your life and you feel like you’re progressing at a reasonable pace—especially in light of the factors working against you--toss your family’s ideals out the window. It's your life!



xenocity
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23 Apr 2015, 12:01 pm

@KimD

The age of consent for marriage in most states is 16, with some states having age 14 for boys.
Arizona is the only state that doesn't have an age of consent for marriage, allowing anyone to get married at any age as long as a judge approves.

The current average age for marriage in the U.S. is 27 at the last report, and has been rising every few years since the 90s.

Many states still have the law that allows kids at 16 to drop themselves out of high school without parental consent.

I just personally find the comments annoying...!


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23 Apr 2015, 12:17 pm

According to my ivy league helicopter parents, 16 or 17. Basically I can only call my work a career when I can reverse engineer anything with one eye, no hands and no computers or paper.

The reasons for using words like 'career' are rapidly changing and fluctuating. Careers don't have knowledge gaps, and we inhabit a time when knowledge is obtained and stored faster than any human can interpret it.

If you're reading this and you're a person, you're a minority in my audience. Something full of transistors is probably handling your career just fine.


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WantToHaveALife
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30 Apr 2015, 6:56 pm

during which decade of the 20th century(since we are still kinda barely into the 21'st century), did it start to become a huge trend, started to become expected of the vast majority of employers that provide financial stability to their employees, expect them to have a college degree before hiring them? overall, when did college education, a college degree start to become more demanding in the job market?



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01 May 2015, 6:16 am

I'm not sure exactly when, but I believe the overall quality of life in the U.S. got a boost after WWII.

The more people were able to afford and earn college degrees, the harder it got to get a job without them; supply, demand, and competition.

I think that as better- and better-qualified employees settled themselves into their positions, the more they asked for/expected better benefits. Employers were earning more and able to compensate their employees better. Some of them were genuinely grateful and generous and/or didn't didn't want to lose their best people to other companies who offered good salaries and benefits. Again, supply, demand, and competition.



WantToHaveALife
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05 May 2015, 11:44 am

I wonder if it is more common in Aspies than it is for NT's, to take longer to develop a career-plan, career-path, takes them longer to decide on what they want to do for the rest of their life.



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05 May 2015, 6:25 pm

WantToHaveALife wrote:
during which decade of the 20th century(since we are still kinda barely into the 21'st century), did it start to become a huge trend, started to become expected of the vast majority of employers that provide financial stability to their employees, expect them to have a college degree before hiring them? overall, when did college education, a college degree start to become more demanding in the job market?


Employers do not provide financial stability to their employees out of the kindness of their hearts -- they pay them the least amount of money possible, so that they won't just quit/walk away (a transfer payment is the economic term, I think). Employers pay what they need to pay to retain staff with the skill set they require.

Requiring a college degree (and often a graduate degree these days!) is a relatively recent phenomenon... the latter is definitely a late '80s/early '90s thing. A grad degree as union card, if you will, as a means of thinning the herd of applicants who apply for any given position.

The requirement for a college/grad degree?

Is a good thing. Is somewhat meritocratic. Well, maybe not a good thing but certainly a less bad than the way people used to go about getting jobs.

Think about how people used to get jobs? Because they knew somebody. Or were related to somebody who already had a job on the assembly line, at the factory or at the white shoe law firm.

A degree or two doesn't automatically translate into a well-paying job (though it can obviously help) but, to me, the value is that it gives you a lot more say in how you choose to earn your living. and there are still jobs out there that pay well and don't require any sort of post-secondary education (though many involve a non-negotiable, unpleasant component of physical labor).

I have a grad degree, so obviously have a certain bias in the whether-a-degree-is-necessary stakes, but it is worth contemplating what having completed any sort of degree/diploma communicates to employers. My take is also that what your degree is in is pretty much irrelevant.

Pretty much everybody who wants to be gainfully employed will need to:
- complete tasks not entirely of their choosing by a deadline not entirely of their choosing to a standard not entirely of your choosing (that may or may not make sense in the first place)
- work with colleagues not entirely of your choosing without strangling them
- submit to the authority of a person who may well be a psychotic hose beast (or who thinks you are one)
- complete long term projects

A degree (rightly or wrongly) communicates to employers that you have those skills, as you successfully spent 3-4 years completing requirements you didn't choose, to standards you didn't set on a timeline you (mostly) had no say in.