She her for the first time in a year!

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Jamesy
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18 Nov 2014, 1:23 pm

A year ago this girl who is in my social crown fancied me a lot and was obssed with me but I have not seen her since January 2014. More to the point in my hometown 6 weeks ago i saw her for the first time in a year and I walked past her. I was suprised she walked past me not acknowledging me like I did not even exist like she was totally uninterested. I thought she would go mental upon seeing me.

According to people i know she has grown up and matured a lot since I last saw her and has got cut ties with some of her old friends.

Why do you think she now has no interest in me :(



AspieUtah
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18 Nov 2014, 1:30 pm

I believe that I am usually very good about noticing my surroundings. But, there are times when someone who knows me suddenly appears or tries to get my attention, but doesn't, and tells me days later that I didn't notice them.

So, I wonder if your friend was simply enthralled with other thoughts, and missed seeing you.


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Jamesy
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18 Nov 2014, 1:41 pm

No I have seen her other times in town in the last few weeks and she is distant and aloof from me. I don't think she cares about me :(



trollcatman
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18 Nov 2014, 1:45 pm

Maybe she thinks the same about you. She didn't talk to you, but did you try to talk to her? Maybe she thinks you are ignoring her as well.



Jamesy
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18 Nov 2014, 1:56 pm

Well I will be honest..... I did smile at her from across the road last week and she did look at me and say "hi". I told my mum about her acknowledging me and she said "well that is just her being 'civil' "

Being civil = not being fond of someone but at the same just being polite not to cause friction.



Nambo
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18 Nov 2014, 2:27 pm

I seem to remember finding Women to be fast.
That being they fancy you like mad but if you don't react to their come-on instantly, they will just give up on you right away and try their charms on somebody else.

Women just want a boyfriend, they don't care much who it is, we are just commodities to them, that's why you will never find a single young Woman, even if they break up with their partner, they will have a new one by that afternoon, no waiting around for them to meet their Soul-Mate.

Maybe NT men are the same?, I never tried dating them, I just know from an Aspie perspective by the time its dawned on you a Woman might be interested, its already too late.

Expecting a girl to wait a year the stuff of fantasy.



rdos
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18 Nov 2014, 2:39 pm

Nambo wrote:
Expecting a girl to wait a year the stuff of fantasy.


I think it isn't. It happens. :wink:



Jamesy
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18 Nov 2014, 3:14 pm

What did my mum mean thst was just her being civil?



AspieUtah
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18 Nov 2014, 3:18 pm

Jamesy wrote:
What did my mum mean thst was just her being civil?

Sometimes, people consider the option of being nice for its own sake is preferable to saying or doing anything which might make another person angry or sad. Most of the time, they really are just avoiding conflicts which might involve themselves.


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Jamesy
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18 Nov 2014, 3:25 pm

My brother said if she liked me before she will like you again.

Do u think that's true?



smudge
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18 Nov 2014, 3:27 pm

Nambo wrote:
I seem to remember finding Women to be fast.
That being they fancy you like mad but if you don't react to their come-on instantly, they will just give up on you right away and try their charms on somebody else.

Women just want a boyfriend, they don't care much who it is, we are just commodities to them, that's why you will never find a single young Woman, even if they break up with their partner, they will have a new one by that afternoon, no waiting around for them to meet their Soul-Mate.

Maybe NT men are the same?, I never tried dating them, I just know from an Aspie perspective by the time its dawned on you a Woman might be interested, its already too late.

Expecting a girl to wait a year the stuff of fantasy.


:lol: I think you speak a lot of truth there. Though, I don't believe in soulmates and, I absolutely need a guy with his own opinion, i.e. my ideal is quite different, which is rare. *

You really prefer a girl who waits for a year? Seriously?

* As in a guy who doesn't change his opinion for the woman he likes, nor copies her opinions. Nor copies the opinions of anyone else close to him just because they're close.


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Last edited by smudge on 19 Nov 2014, 2:23 pm, edited 1 time in total.

AspieUtah
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18 Nov 2014, 3:37 pm

Jamesy wrote:
My brother said if she liked me before she will like you again.

Do u think that's true?

Sure! But, my experience with renewing friendships is that they almost always start over from square one. They advance more quickly than the first time around, but they don't start out where they left off.


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DoubleCatrin
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18 Nov 2014, 4:20 pm

Jamesy wrote:
A year ago this girl who is in my social crown fancied me a lot and was obssed with me but I have not seen her since January 2014. More to the point in my hometown 6 weeks ago i saw her for the first time in a year and I walked past her. I was suprised she walked past me not acknowledging me like I did not even exist like she was totally uninterested. I thought she would go mental upon seeing me.

According to people i know she has grown up and matured a lot since I last saw her and has got cut ties with some of her old friends.

Why do you think she now has no interest in me :(


maybe she decided that her obsession for you was not healthy and did her best to move on?


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18 Nov 2014, 4:25 pm

trollcatman wrote:
Maybe she thinks the same about you. She didn't talk to you, but did you try to talk to her? Maybe she thinks you are ignoring her as well.


This could definitely be the case.



Jamesy
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18 Nov 2014, 4:27 pm

I am just very shy



kraftiekortie
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18 Nov 2014, 6:37 pm

What's a "social crown?" Do you mean "social crowd?"

Yes, JamesY, Café au lait is right.....this could very possibly be the case.

No matter what anybody says, and no matter the amount of influence "gender politics" has had on the world:

Most frequently, the woman expects the man to make the "first move."